Board 8 > The greatest musical ever written might be based on B8 (Be More Chill)

(+) Yeah! (+)

It starts off with possibly the greatest opening lyrics of any musical ever:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=54FbCrc5qg0

That's our protagonist, Jeremy, who would fit into B8 so well it's scary. He says later on in the musical when talking to his best friend:

As users we have fought together for years
Both Nintendo zombies

I can only assume that first line refers to SMFFFC. Do we have a Save My Nintendo Character? We must do right? Anyway, Michael the best friend is cool being at the bottom of the high school food chain because:

Evolution's the survival of the fittest, right? But now, because of technology,
you don't have to be strong to survive!
Which means there's never been a better time in history to be a loser!

And like all good B8er stereotypes, Jeremy is a loser who can't talk to girls - and the one girl in particular he has a crush on (Christine). He wants to sign up to be in the play but he thinks that's a sign up sheet for getting called "gay" so he doesn't. Until Christine signs up first. Duh.

Christine has clearly never worked with HaRRicH, because she thinks that:

Life is easy in rehearsal

Maybe she's the Brian? She's probably also a B8er, she has:

mad, gigantic feelings,
Red and frantic feelings,
About most everything
Like gun control, like spring,
Like if im living up to all I'm meant to be.
I also have a touch of ADD.

Mr Reyes, the theatre class teacher and therefore director knows more telling basically everyone:

I just have to keep you from ruining my big night.

The local bully and resident druggie at school, Rich takes pity on Jeremy for some reason, recommending Jeremy "some top-secret-can't-even-look-it-up-on-the-internet shit" that can make him become cool that he can buy from Rich's dealer:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kOgEjj9Ma-U

The SQUIP (Super Quantum Unit Intel Processor) is a microchip that analyses you and your surroundings and literally tells you how to act in order to become cool. In order to activate it, you need to... I promise I'm not lying guys... you need to drink Mountain Dew.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XN-JIyQCHqU

So, our B8er Nintendo zombie takes the pill, drinks the dew... and now has a voice in his head that tells him how to be cool in order to have sex with girls. He goes along with the voice, but the SQUIP tells him he's not cool enough for Christine yet, so he dates a stepping stone chick. He also gets drunk for the first time at a Halloween party, which knocks the voice in his head into Japanese temporarily.

As a result, everything goes wrong and locked in the bathroom he admits he hates parties:

I wish I stayed at home in bed watching cable porn

He leaves the party just before Rich sets fire to the house because he's started ignoring his SQUIP. As the play heads towards it's end, it turns out that the SQUIP wants to take over the world by "infecting" everyone and on the night of the play, everyone in the cast drinks from a prop bottle of SQUIP'd Mountain Dew. Jeremy realises that:

Green Moutain Dew activates it and Mountain Dew Red shuts it off!

The SQUIP hears this and tells Jeremy:

Why do you think we had it discontinued?
To get rid of me now, you'd need a time machine to the 1990s.

Michael somehow arrives with a bottle and forcefeeds it to everyone (???)

Fin.

Along the way, the show also offers us a touching look at Jeremy's relationship with his dad:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ay4za9N5S-U

One of the girls Jeremy has a chance to hook up fits a very specific B8er niche with this offer:

Wanna get inside my diaper, boy?
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dude what
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Tag for weirdness.
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Red Mountain Dew never stopped being available as far as I know.
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@LusterSoldier ? Does this musical's research fail?
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I...um... they're on to us.
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paperwarior posted...

Red Mountain Dew never stopped being available as far as I know.

I researched this, and Mountain Dew Red and Mountain Dew Code Red are two unique products.
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Semi-unrelated, but I'd watch Wigs the Musical
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Terastodon posted...

I researched this, and Mountain Dew Red and Mountain Dew Code Red are two unique products.

Huh, never heard of Mountain Dew Red before. After researching it, it was an extremely limited release back in 1988 and has not been seen since then.
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