Current Events > CE why am I not sexual?

(+) Yeah! (+)

So I had 4 bfs


First one really wanted sex and I broke up when he started telling people I did stuff that I didn't do.

Then a bf who asked for sex and I said I don't want, and he texted me the next day saying he doesn't believe in long distance relationships. (I believed it at first. We live about 2 miles apart)

Then a guy who I told I wasn't gonna do sex but he still wanted to date. First date he started groping me and scared me and eventually I gathered courage to dip out and protect myself!!

Then I was like why do I never want to have Sex like what's my emotional burden here

So I had sex with a guy. It was boring and I didn't enjoy it much but like whatever he finished a couple times pretty fast and I wasn't having fun and he was tired and I went home lol.

Then I got a new boyfriend and he was like trying to snookie but I was like I don't want to give nookie I wasn't comfortable.


Why am I so uncomfortable with having sex with people I date, yet it feels so boring and kinda nothing with people I don't date?


Am I a single player game?
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LittleRoyal posted...

he doesn't believe in long distance relationships. (I believed it at first. We live about 2 miles apart)

That's literally within walking distance, wtf
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Probably due to the fact you've been having bad experiences with it. So you assume all experiences will be the same.

Low hormones? Genuinely curious. Its based mostly around hormones. Sometimes i actually dont feel like it at all.
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Try dating a chick?
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Vegy posted...

Try dating a chick?

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You sound very normal. There's nothing wrong with you. In time you'll grow more comfortable with yourself and with boys. There's no rush. Take your time!
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Everyone's different. Don't feel like you NEED to be sexual. If that's who you are, do you. And don't settle for someone who's not cool with that.

Without knowing you irl its hard to say. Maybe you didn't find those people comfortable enough to have sex with them, maybe you're asexual, maybe you're too timid (sex in the dark without lights could do it), maybe you just don't want to have sex.
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KiwiTerraRizing posted...

Vegy posted...

Try dating a chick?

Nah I don't want to. I sexed with a lady before and it was really fun, but that's because it was basically like doing it myself but I didn't have to worry about anything and like other stuff. But all in all I don't want to date a girl. I don't see myself as bi or anything it was just fun stuff that is honestly pretty embarrassing and socially I pretend never happened.
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LittleRoyal posted...

Nah I don't want to. I sexed with a lady before and it was really fun, but that's because it was basically like doing it myself but I didn't have to worry about anything and like other stuff. But all in all I don't want to date a girl. I don't see myself as bi or anything it was just fun stuff that is honestly pretty embarrassing and socially I pretend never happened.

can guys do dis to just for fun without being bi or anything iyo?
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_Kowalski_ posted...

You sound very normal. There's nothing wrong with you. In time you'll grow more comfortable with yourself and with boys. There's no rush. Take your time!

Hmm thanks!

Go_Totodile posted...

Everyone's different. Don't feel like you NEED to be sexual. If that's who you are, do you. And don't settle for someone who's not cool with that.

Thank you!! Mm I like that response just fine.

Idk it's kinda embarrassing with all my friends trying to get me to try diff stuff or enjoy it or thinking it's like a party trick that they love mentioning how I don't even like that stuff.
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one possibility is that you're fraysexual, meaning you only feel sexual attraction to people you're unfamiliar with

it's on the asexual spectrum, and it might be worth looking into
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averagejoel posted...

one possibility is that you're fraysexual, meaning you only feel sexual attraction to people you're unfamiliar with

it's on the asexual spectrum, and it might be worth looking into

Awh I don't like that I want to get married and adopt kids someday.
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LittleRoyal posted...

averagejoel posted...

one possibility is that you're fraysexual, meaning you only feel sexual attraction to people you're unfamiliar with

it's on the asexual spectrum, and it might be worth looking into

Awh I don't like that I want to get married and adopt kids someday.

don't stress about it - there are people all over the asexual spectrum that have spouses and families and otherwise live a normal life
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Yeah maybe but idk. Sounds like a marriage where you're not attracted to each other gets hard.
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Im not sexual either, if I am normal then so are you lol. Sex just does not interest me.
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LittleRoyal posted...

Yeah maybe but idk. Sounds like a marriage where you're not attracted to each other gets hard.

there's more than one type of attraction - sexual, romantic, aesthetic, for example - and they're not necessarily related to each other
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averagejoel posted...

LittleRoyal posted...

Yeah maybe but idk. Sounds like a marriage where you're not attracted to each other gets hard.

there's more than one type of attraction - sexual, romantic, aesthetic, for example - and they're not necessarily related to each other

That isn't what I've been told!!

I hear marriages die out when the sex stops almost every time
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LittleRoyal posted...

I hear marriages die out when the sex stops almost every time

lmao, no.
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Well I heard that
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Possibly asexual. If so, not a big deal at all, I am as well. Or demisexual, to be precise.
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Have you tried masterbating more like getting a dildo and such? That might activate your sex drive.
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Leanaunfurled posted...

Possibly asexual. If so, not a big deal at all, I am as well. Or demisexual, to be precise.

It's fine that people are it's just not what I want tbh.

GameofWheels posted...

Have you tried masterbating more like getting a dildo and such? That might activate your sex drive.

I feel like that's too purpose but I don't really use toys scared of it being found or simply that they're too big or long.
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Lean I hope my comment didn't offend you
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LittleRoyal posted...

Lean I hope my comment didn't offend you

Oh not at all, I just couldn't think of anything helpful for you to say so I didn't reply. Sorry if you thought I was upset.
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Leanaunfurled posted...

LittleRoyal posted...

Lean I hope my comment didn't offend you

Oh not at all, I just couldn't think of anything helpful for you to say so I didn't reply. Sorry if you thought I was upset.

Oh okay! Don't be sorry I was just nervous silly me though. I've been told I have a tendency to be demeaning or insulting to people on accident so I'm a bit insecure about that now
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do you have sexual attraction/urge for men or anyone?
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Conflict posted...

2 miles is long-distance? Are you both ants?

No. But I'm short so.

Arcanine2009 posted...

do you have sexual attraction/urge for men or anyone?

Uhh idk I guess
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@LittleRoyal

You should start out with something small then. The average penis is 5 inches so something about that size or a vibrator. I usually hide mine under my bed or under some clothes in my closet and they haven't been found yet.
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You should probably start from first base and then move forward, unless every guy you date wants 4th base from da get go lol
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Vegy posted...

LittleRoyal posted...

Nah I don't want to. I sexed with a lady before and it was really fun, but that's because it was basically like doing it myself but I didn't have to worry about anything and like other stuff. But all in all I don't want to date a girl. I don't see myself as bi or anything it was just fun stuff that is honestly pretty embarrassing and socially I pretend never happened.

can guys do dis to just for fun without being bi or anything iyo?

Dat bicurious vegy.

So adorable. <3
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LittleRoyalWithCheese
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You sound young. It's probably not fun to hear but these things will most likely sort themselves out as you grow up.
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Do you crave any other sort of intimacy in a relationship? Like cuddling, having someone close to you, etc?

It sounds like you don't have very much of a sex drive or haven't really explored yourself enough to "unlock" your potential. There's quite a large spectrum for that, so you shouldn't ever feel like you're not normal or whatever just because you're not out humping everything that moves.

I feel for you, since most guys are horn dogs that want sex pretty much all the time. It would suck to genuinely want the other aspects of a relationship but to never be able to find someone that could be patient with you when it comes to sexual stuff.
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Game of wheels this is embarrassing for me!' I'm scared of width more so

Vegy idk really. They just ask when we'll have sex

Yes Zachary (-.-) I hope that's leading up to something because it's embarrassing.

Scar, I'm 20! And a half ;)

Yes! I do. I cuddle with friends, but I'd rather cuddle with feelings behind it. I mean there's feelings with friends, but it's different you know?
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Because you haven't spent a night with me yet.

Badum-cha
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LittleRoyal posted...

Arcanine2009 posted...

do you have sexual attraction/urge for men or anyone?

Uhh idk I guess

You either do or you don't. Arousal is a pretty "yes or no" feeling. >_>
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@LittleRoyal

It's length that gets me. Width feels better than just being long. The last guy I was with practically stabbed me with his. A good combination of both is probably good. I got a dildo about six inches long.
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Um, from the sounds of things, you probably don't have anything wrong. You probably just need more time to get comfortable around someone you like than the first hour you've spent together. Literally 3 of those four bfs seem to have come to a beginning and an end in like less than a day or two, and the other just doesn't seem to have been all that close or long either.

This literally just means you probably aren't a thirsty person and you want something more meaningful. I recommend trying to start relationships based on something OTHER than sex. I know it is hard, boys be thirsty AF, but I've found you can find some diamonds if you sift through those.
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kewldude475 posted...

Sounds like either a hormonal problem, drug use (of course aphrodisiacs like alcohol is sometimes don't necessarily apply).

I don't use drugs! I mean I drink sometimes and very rarely eat weed stuff but that's only even been a couple times! and I used to be like super not into that but some guy convinced me eventually.


Ivynn well I don't know specifically.

Wheels, idk what good width is I have small fingers but one or sometimes two is perfectly fine to make a sandwich. Umm idk you know >.>

Sylph, the third guy yeah was literally one date I didn't even count him as a bf but I talked about the expirience on CE and they were very mean and insulting to me about how I handled it (basically said no sex, but I didn't specify no groping but idc cuz it scared me and I already established I didn't want sex i assumed that meant him feeling my parts, so I dipped and avoided him and never talked to him again. Well almost) but yeah. The first guy I was with for like less than a month and he started telling people stuff, second guy I was with for like 3 months!! Or something.
And the fourth guy was only 2 weeks then he asked for sex and a week later with me still not putting out he was outtie.
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So yeah, it sounds like you never really got to a real relationship with any of these guys. You found a bunch of losers looking for an easy chick to play with. This is basically the difference I lay between a boy and a man. You want to be looking for a man if you want anything real, and this has nothing to do with age.

Just don't listen to any of the posts saying that this is a problem with you. It may be that you are advertising yourself wrong when you are looking for boys, but my guess is that you don't actually do that and these guys came to you. You may have to go looking for a good guy to be with, the ones that chase you aren't usually worth it.
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Vyrulisse posted...

Because you haven't spent a night with me yet.

Badum-cha

I can vouch for this. Omg, what a night.
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I'm not advertising me wrong! I wear shirts that go down to my waist and show little to no skin. I even have my chest covered and when I don't I have no cleavage anyway
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Sayoria posted...

Vyrulisse posted...

Because you haven't spent a night with me yet.

Badum-cha

I can vouch for this. Omg, what a night.

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V-E-G-Y- posted...

Sayoria posted...

Vyrulisse posted...

Because you haven't spent a night with me yet.

Badum-cha

I can vouch for this. Omg, what a night.

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SSJGrimReaper posted...

V-E-G-Y- posted...

Sayoria posted...

Vyrulisse posted...

Because you haven't spent a night with me yet.

Badum-cha

I can vouch for this. Omg, what a night.

Say I can believe. But isn't Vy lesbian...?
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