"Thanks," JEFF ZERO understates in response to JEFFRAZE's wacky science tricks. "Gee, your SIGNALTRON really comes in handy, huh? That's pretty neat."
Taking a few steps forward with JOLTEON by his side, which can be read as (JOLTEONBYMYSIDE) if we want to make fun of FFX's voice acting again, but please don't compare the Jeff/Jolteon dynamic to that of Tidus/Yuna because I promise, it's nothing like that, Jeff Zero whips out his own form of a Signaltron in an effort to provide even more data on that which lurks in darkness.
It's Dexter, his very own vocalized Pokedex! Dexter ought to be able to shed some light on things -- both literally and figuratively if necessary, as Jeff has installed a flashlight app! But for now, from a comfortable distance, he merely scans the unknown.
-- K | H | A | Q | Q | A | H | K "we're about 50 years behind the rest of western society." -icon on B8
Raka Putra pulls out his cell phone, approaching the darkness warily. He hopes that his cell phone battery has enough power to shed some light into this unnatural darkness.
what the **** do you think happens
a giant blue fist shoots out of the blackness, snatching up his puny form and crushing his body. his arms snap like twigs and his rubs burst and splinter inwards, ripping his insides to shreds [3]. his body is flung back out through the secret entrance to the Tower.
Tom rushes into the magical darkness headfirst, relying on his monk senses to try the art of blindfighting. He can feel the presence of a large body in the darkness with him, and with a loud grunt it swings a southpaw at him. Tom adjusts his stance, intercepts the massive limb, and twists feet while swinging his upper body around [1]. He ridirects attack and flings his assailant out through the busted Green Gate into the Floor 2 Entrance Hall.
CRASH!
BLUE DEMON, a 12 foot tall monstrosity, lands in the middle of the group so hard that he shakes the ground. He has been knocked down and WOUNDED. He has a humanoid form but a massively disproportioned upper body, having such a muscular figure that he must use his arms to walk as well.
Tom also hears cries for help in the darkness coming from the left and the right, as well as the clinging and pounding of people slapping and shaking iron bars, trying to break free from cells.
Barry Soetoro uses an indirect approach to deal with the basilisks, by getting elected as the president of their fine nation and then destroying it from within [1]. The treasure chest is now free to access.
JeffRaze quickly purchases a QUANTUM JEFF ENTANGLEMENT DEVICE and then activates his Signaltron to scout out the darkness past the busted Green Gate [AUTO]. Past the Green Gate, Tom the Monk can be seen standing just inside the doors. About ten yards ahead of him is RED DEMON, a humanoid female with a black horn protruding from her head. She seems to be wielding a katana with lightning running along the length of it. To the left and right are rows of prison cells with haggard looking prisoners kept within.
[Note: If you created a character who has died thus far on Floor 2, you may create a new character who starts in one of the Prison Cells. You must spend an action successfully escaping from the cells in some way to join the party.]
A bit further back, right at the edge of the range of the Signaltron, the Magical Darkness provides a partial shroud of darkness for a small humanoid figure that appears to be an elaborately dressed little girl. She's holding a pipe in one hand, from which a trail of smoke runs toward the Green Gate.
The pipe wielding figure retreats further into the darkness after the Signaltron pings the area.
Flip Trigle purchases 7,999 worth of Stock from the Merchant. SEA SCARRED WARRIOR swipes one of his coins and attempts to forge a LUCKY COIN. Flip turns around, cuts him in half with the Vorpal Idol of Earth, and purchases his remaining 1 gold of stock . Whoops for SEA SCARRED WARRIOR [3].
ADAM heads down the East Pass and triggers the trip wire with his slingshot, causing an Acid Sickle to slash out at the empty air in the Trap Room [1]. One trap has been cleared.
Kahu attempts to resurrect Natwaf as a Harry Potter Phoenix, but fails in his attempts [2]. However, Natwaf's ashes does come back as Peter, the Phoenix from Shining Force 2 instead.
BIGPUN9999 starts firing ebay links into the magical darkness, at RED DEMON. She is not currently interested in purchasing erasers that look like Capcom characters [2].
Restandre casts Divine Light into the Magical Darkness, but it's already been lit up [2]. RED DEMON does not seem pleased about the existence of a White Mage.
Masterplum sits around trying to learn Blue Magic at this time, but he doesn't have a book on Blue Magic [2]. Plus, shouldn't the thrashing BLUE DEMON less than 5 feet away from him be a bigger concern?
Mr. Lazy Everyday tries to psyche the Basilisks out, but they're already dead [2]. He decides that opening the chest is much easier anyway, and loots the treasure inside.
[Mr. Lazy Everyday found an Orb of Cold] [Barry Soetoro found a Book of Corruptors]
"Bad" Frank Phillips limps into the darkness, shooting at RED DEMON, but she is too fast and dodges his bullets [2].
"White mage!", hisses RED DEMON. "Kill it!"
She raises her katana into the air, treating it like a Lightning Rod. A moment later there's a thunder clap and she swings it at Restandre, firing a lightning bolt at her. Restandre rolls out of the way [2], causing chunks of stone to fly all over the entrance hall pelting those gathered around.
She bumps into BLUE DEMON who is laying on his back. He grabs at her, scooping her up in one palm and using the other to stand. He attempts to crush her, but she manages to push outward at his fingers with her arms and leg both and prevent herself from being squashed [2]. Although she is snatched up inside BLUE DEMON's grasp, she somehow manages to narrowly survive.
[Note: RED DEMON and BLUE DEMON have the capability to act every phase as if they were players. They will not kill or WOUND themselves, but they can miss on a 2 or a 3. On a 1 they may successfully kill a player they have targeted (which player they target is decided at random).]
[Note: Yes, Retandre is just that unlucky that she was targeted TWICE]
Jeff Zero whips out his Dexter and tries to scan RED DEMON. Scanning. . . Scanning. . . WHOOSH! RED DEMON slashes with her katana, sending a wave of wind elemental energy flying at Jeff Zero [3]. He is sliced in twain, but a moment later the QUANTUM thingy rewrites reality and bring his pieces back together. Unfortunately, Dexter is still broken, and the QUANTUM JEFF THING breaks as well from the strain.
"Now, foolish adventurers", RED DEMON utters.
"What will you do. . .?"
[NOTE: We have entered an ACTIVE PHASE. There is no time limit, and your actions will occur in the chronological order in which they are posted. I may not update right away but I'll try to get back to you as we go.]
[Also Note: If you are dead and want to submit a new character you may do so, just remember to start in a jail cell!]
Active Roster [15] Barry Soetoro, Lvl 3 Muslim (Inventory: Book of Corruptors) Tom the Lvl 20 Monk (Inventory: 8000 Gold) [BRAWLER] Flip Trigle the Lvl 12 Newscaster (Inventory: Vorpal Idol of Earth, Shining Artifact, 8000 Stock) JeffRaze, Lvl 14 Scientist (Inventory: Bracer of COURAGE) [Wound][QUANTUM JEFF] ADAM, Lvl 7 CHILD (Inventory: Slingshot]) Kahu, Lvl 3 Beastmaster [SUMMONING] Peter, Lvl 1 Phoenix BIGPUN9999, Lvl 1 Merchant (Inventory: ebay links) Restandre, Lvl 3 Chick [WHITE MAGIC] Master Plum, Lvl 5 Plum (Inventory: Ankh of Resurrection) Mr. Lazy Everyday, Lvl 5 Layabout (Inventory: Orb of Cold) "Bad" Frank Phillips, Lvl 5 Outlaw (Inventory: Rifle) Seplito, Lvl 3 Dancer Jeff Zero the Lvl 12 Pokemon Trainer (Inventory: Jolteon, Flaming Longsword, 4000 Gold)[QUANTUM JEFF] Ryokles, Lvl 5 ???? (Inventory: Frying Pan)
The Dead [17] saberz9 - Shot in the eye with a lightning bolt for trying to ape my good friend "bad" Frank Phillips in Phase 2-1. US President Barack "The Condor" Obama - Was thrown into an orcs cookpot in Phase 2-1. Miguel de Cervantes XXXVII - Had his throat ripped out by an Orc in Phase 2-1. Tom Brady - Cut in two with a Flaming Longsword in Phase 2-1. Pirate King - Killed by Karma for attempting to make his own Lucky Coin in Phase 2-1. Ryu - Shot with a repeating crossbow in Phase 2-1. He won't be going home to be a family man. DANT - Made a fool of himself and literally walked right into the same attack right after Ryu in Phase 2-1. Yellow Priest Natwaf - Crushed by Maria's thumb in Phase 2-1. MegaWentGood - Eaten by his own Tentomon in Phase 2-1. Whatever a Tentomon is. Cremona - what kind of a name is Cremona in the Phase 2-1. edwardsdv - Slain by unseen foes in the magical darkness past the Green Gate in Phase 2-1. Jack Swagger - Has his face whipped off with a steel whip in Phase 2-2. Jon Michael Carter - Blown up by his malfunctioning Forcefield Belt in Phase 2-2. Jawarius - Stung by a Rainbow Scorpion while looting saberz9's corpse in Phase 2-2. Bobby Roode - Showed up late, clueless, and was killed by Rattlesnakes in short order in Phase 2-2. Raka - Crushed by BLUE DEMON in Phase 2-3 for thinking a cellphone would trump magical darkness. SEA SCARRED WARRIOR - Cut in half by Flip Trigle for stealing 1 Gold in Phase 2-3.
-- I can see a better time, when all our dreams come true http://i.imgur.com/wITvQ.jpg
Seplito pounds the air beside him, as if there is an invisible jukebox, and "Oh Yeah" by Yello begins to play. He begins to dance seductively, with many gyrations of the hips, attempting to mesmerize the Red Demon (...And maybe Blue. You never know how they swing) to allow his fellow adventurers an opening to plan and attack.
-- SEP Nash, Smelling Like the Vault since 1996 Step FOUR! Get Paid! http://i33.tinypic.com/2v1sq51.jpg
"Dexter...!" JEFF ZERO cries out, shocked that his faithful computer pal is down for the count and apparently not all that shaken by his recent bodily separation thing.
It doesn't take long before Jeff notices the demons' obvious interest in Restandre. "There must be some reason for their repeated attacks! JOLTEON, if you can get in close with Swift -- which never misses, no matter what, rain or shine, heaven or hell, Snorlax or raging demons of the underworld -- maybe you can loosen the Blue Demon's grasp on that girl long enough for her to break free! But Jolteon... please don't do anything too rash! Get in and get out with one fell swoop, do you hear me? Swift-slam into the demon, and then swiftly make your way out!"
But Jolteon shakes his head, determined to do even more than that if possible. Instead, he nods to the launchpad on his back, indicating to studious trainers like Jeff Zero that he's going to bash into the demon with a Swift attack and attempt to thrust Restandre out of harm's reach and onto a safe perch.
"Jolteon... you're a real hero!" Jeff declares, and he holds his Flaming Longsword forward menacingly, approaching the demons with a shout. "Hey! You let my friend go, you big jerks! Or else...!"
This might just give Jolteon the element of surprise necessary...!
-- K | H | A | Q | Q | A | H | K "we're about 50 years behind the rest of western society." -icon on B8
Romney brandishes his Book of Mormon and uses it to slam open his cell door [1]. He looks to his right, seeing pipe-wielding girl retreat into a nearby teleporter. To his left he sees Red Demon swinging her katana about, elemental energy swirling around it with each repeated swing. In the cell across from him. . .
swordz4
swordz4 summons GUTS from Berserk, trying to slice open the bars of his cell. Unfortunately, he's not a Summoner, he's just an insane clone from the swordz project [2]. Romney, feeling pity on him, comes over and unlocks his door from the outside (Passive success).
[Note: Because Romney and swordz have broken out of their cells, any character created in one of the jail cells may now escape on a success or passive roll. If you kill yourself trying to get out, you'll still die. Good luck returners!]
-- I can see a better time, when all our dreams come true http://i.imgur.com/wITvQ.jpg
"Bad" Frank Phillips attempts to let the RED DEMON get a free shot at him, but she doesn't seem interested [2]. Although he failed his check, in a weird way he somehow just prevented himself from being targeted.
Seplito
Seplito has afflicted RED DEMON with the CHARM status [1]. She lost her action for this turn.
Jeff Zero
Jolteon leaps at BLUE DEMON, attempting to break Restandre free. BLUE DEMON catches the little bugger in mid-air and squashes him, causing Jeff's best friend to explode in a cloud of Poke-organs [3].
-- I can see a better time, when all our dreams come true http://i.imgur.com/wITvQ.jpg
(Welp, that was my action for this round, but just for reference's sake, if Jeff successfully winds up riding atop Sleipnir, he's going to scream all manner of non-profanities that are still really quite angry and mean-spirited as he plans his attack)
-- K | H | A | Q | Q | A | H | K "we're about 50 years behind the rest of western society." -icon on B8
mr lazy everyday comes back from the west pass with his new treasure, the Orb of Cold, and attempts to use it on the BLUE DEMON. Oh, it's stuck to his hand now like when you lick a telephone pole in the winter [2].
BLUE DEMON
BLUE DEMON swings his hand with Restandre inside of it at Mr. Lazy Everyday, trying to fell him. However, Mr. Lazy Everyday steps backward exactly one time (this is his measured amount of effort he's willing to put into any task) and successfully dodges the attack [2]. Restandre is dropped, but Mr. Lazy Everyday doesn't feel like catching her.
'ouch', says Restandre as she hits the ground.
-- I can see a better time, when all our dreams come true http://i.imgur.com/wITvQ.jpg
Kahu summons Slepneir, and zips around the Main Hall, avoiding several wide swings from Blue Demon who literally cannot keep up with or process the movements of the legendary creature. Kahu grabs Jeff Zero, snatching him up onto the horse. Jeff Zero stands up on Slepneir's back, shouting wild curses as they fly at RED DEMON with super speed. She begins to raise her katana, the weapon bursting into flame to meet their charge.
However, Slepneir is too fast for her to even raise her weapon before Jeff Zero cuts her down [1]. RED DEMON has been Wounded!
-- I can see a better time, when all our dreams come true http://i.imgur.com/wITvQ.jpg
Look at it this way Restandre, me catching you is worse than hitting the floor since there's an orb stuck to my hand that you do not want to land on. It might even freeze you. And hey, I got you out of trouble didn't I.
--
2002-2010 R.I.P Noble Nine we miss ya ;_; 07/28/02-12/13/09 R.I.P CATS we miss ya ;_;
Plum blasts at BLUE DEMON with a Holy Arrow while he's distracted [1]. BLUE DEMON has taken a second WOUND! Plum wisely backs away from BLUE DEMON, wanting to avoid his wrath as the beast screams out in pain.
Nuri
Nuri the Nightless powers up his hands with burning holy energy, melting through the cell bars that confine him. He walks right into RED DEMON, stumbling backwards after being slashed by Jeff Zero and swinging her flaming katana at random. She lops Nuri's head clean off by accident[3].
-- I can see a better time, when all our dreams come true http://i.imgur.com/wITvQ.jpg
Urago does the same thing as Nuri, melting the bars with holy energy, except he's on the other side of the prison and also he fails to melt through the bars [2]. He doesn't get cut in half by RED DEMON, but President Romney sneaks over and lets him out of his cell.
Congrats, Urago, you have joined the party without dying!
-- I can see a better time, when all our dreams come true http://i.imgur.com/wITvQ.jpg
Flip Trigle's producer has asked Flip to get a sound byte of the Blue Demon saying "When I need to know what's going on, I turn to Channel 4 Action News."
--
i consider myself a very positive influence on the youths of my community http://sonicgenerationart.com/wp-content/uploads/2011/11/slider15.jpg
JeffRaze lobs the DESTRUCTIVE INTERFERENCE PULSAR at BLUE DEMON, hoping to avenge Jolteon. With a series of loud pops and the crackle of SCIENCE, several small lasers and lightning bolts shoot through the BLUE DEMON (and also narrowly miss any of JeffRaze's allies in the vicinity) [1]. JeffRaze fist pumps as the BLUE DEMON goes down!
[BLUE DEMON has been killed!]
-- I can see a better time, when all our dreams come true http://i.imgur.com/wITvQ.jpg
Rancerot fails at attempting to bust out of his cell, but does succeed in trying my patience [2]. swordz4 comes over and unlocks his cell for him, letting him out.
[NOTE: If you make a jail character and they die, NO MORE JAIL CHARACTERS]
-- I can see a better time, when all our dreams come true http://i.imgur.com/wITvQ.jpg
Optional Boss wakes up from the commotion. Seeing everyone leaving, and tired of his job, he decides to follow suit, trashing against his cell to escape.
--
My Little Phineas and Ferb: Summer is Magic! Aww, I lost to SuperNiceDog, Winner of the Rivalry Rumble Guru Contest