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48. Christian Bale is at Your Party
Source: Rob Cantor
Villain: Christian Bale
Nominator: jcgamer107 (1 left)

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=A8oIDvCl6lA

Villainy: 3
Characterization: 6
Melody: 8
Total: 17/30

"Now he's stabbing at your wife (What don't you f**king understand?!) / With a carrot for a knife (Give me a f**king answer!)"

Man, Actual Cannibal Shia LaBeaouf felt like it was largely in good fun, but this song gives me just the slightest feeling Cantor legitimately doesn't like Christian Bale. I mean, that terribly endowed line felt personal.

I hate how unbelievably catchy this song is. Bale's "what don't you fucking understand" rant is already pretty iconic on its own, but using his lines to end each stanza is musical comedy genius. The lyrics are complete nonsense, but that only adds to the spirit of the song.

The song tells you quite a bit about Christian Bale. He's rude, antisocial, uncomfortably flirtatious, unhinged, aggressive and... has the ability to vanish into sand? There wasn't much villainous there; the worst things he does are stabbing someone with a carrot (which I can't assume is actually doing much, although he at least intends it to) and flashing everyone as he runs down the street.