LogFAQs > #964906630

zzeennoolloo posted...

Everyone, including myself, in this topic who has actually had to deal with someone with BPD in real life in regards to a close relationship (whether it was an ex-girlfriend or a relative) has the same common denominator: the relationship turned into a shit show of very fucked up and vicious proportions due to the BPD viciously getting out of control. All of us in this topic who had a personal real life horror story about someone in our lives with BPD (try reading this entire topic, you will find several) gave our personal experiences and if you notice NOT one of us had a happy ending.

We all simply gave the TC our personal experience and let the TC decide on whether to go out on a date with this woman. If you read the entire topic you would have seen that TC cancelled the date. Honestly, I personally feel that the TC did the right thing as they could have been walking into an extremely shitty experience that would have fucked them up in several ways, even in a very permanent way. I personally feel that the best thing for the TC right now is to try to find someone else who will offer them a healthy relationship.

I know some people don't find it politically correct that we are talking about our experiences with someone with BPD, but for fucks sake, we all decided to tell our stories as a fucking WARNING to the TC and for damn good reasons. Ultimately, it's up to the TC. They already cancelled the date. If they reverse their decision, obviously there is nothing me or anyone else who gave their stories can do about it. It's the TC's decision and maybe... just MAYBE... things might turn out for the good. However, in the event things do get viciously chaotic (and they most likely will, especially when the "Honeymoon" period of the first few weeks of the relationship are over) ALL of us gave our WARNINGS throughout this topic... can't say we didn't try to warn them.

^THIS. The chances of something going horrendously wrong are greatly, significantly elevated beyond belief when BPD is factored in.

Note that I have experience with an ex and I do not quite agree. It was often a shit show, but it never reached vicious levels, and I also recognize how I made her worse. Sure, it didn't work out, but I would still recommend certain guys to date her if they have the right temperament. In many ways, she was the most giving person I have ever met.

Why do I always end up arguing both sides in these topics? Oh, because I can actually see how everyone is trying their best and deserves some empathy.