LogFAQs > #895521620

There is no circumstance where low self esteem is attractive. Women IN GENERAL (yes this is true whether you believe or not) do not want to be with people that are not confident in themselves. That doesn't mean you have to be an arrogant douche, but confidence is attractive. In fact confidence (w/o being an arrogant prick) can make the difference between you picking up someone you would rate as a 5 versus someone you would rate as a 9.

People who give off low self esteem vibes and don't have confidence in themselves are pushovers, pushovers are NOT attractive...

Exceptions exist but they are just that, exceptions. They are most definitely not the norm.

The single most important thing during the initial dating period is your confidence. It's not your looks and it's not your money. Both of these things, admittedly do help, but they are not a requirement.

For a long term relationship there has to be SOME physical attraction and you must have a personality to make it last. But confidence is the spark, physical attraction and personality are what keep the spark going.

mew4ever posted...

This is all sound advice but I really struggle with 2. I dont hold any ill will to any woman but I beat myself up so much when I get rejected (which is a lot). I'm proud and confident of my life outside of getting chicks but there's just something demoralizing about failure there that isn't present when I fail at other things.

Honestly, for someone that has been beating themselves up for getting rejected for a long period of time, this is probably the hardest step to take. You have to be able to convince yourself that rejection doesn't matter and that takes a drastic change in the way you perceive things.

The best advise i can give for you to that specific point is this:

1. There are plenty of women in the world, getting rejected by one just means you have a chance with another.
2. Do not put women on a pedestal, they are people just like you.
3. Rejection HAPPENS, EVERYONE gets rejected at some point, even rich people, even famous people, even "chad's." I challenge you to find one person that is in mid 20's that hasn't been rejected in the past. Granted, looks, money, and status DO tend to make things easier, but it's not a requirement by any means.
4. The best way to get over it is to put yourself out their, get rejected, brush it off, and try again. When you finally don't get rejected, it will make rejection that much easier going forward.
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