I challenged myself to go to school full time and work fulltime. I challenged myself to find gainful employment, and eventually to start up my own department. When the business sold, I challenged myself to start my own. When I needed the startup capital, I challenged myself to drive 60 hours a week to earn it myself rather than seeking an investor. When the business died out after a couple years I used the remaining funds from my last deal to get my PI licence and start a different business.
The most important thing I learned from all of it was that the moment you feel content is the moment you stop growing. That is the most dangerous time in anyone's life. That is the time that will tell you it is OK to give up on what you wanted once, in favor of the safety you think you have now.
That entire decade and a half paid off for all the work I did, but none of it was as challenging or rewarding as raising my daughter. None of the successes I've know have ever brought me as much pride as Rein does, and when I hold her none of my failures matter anymore.
I'm all emotional on percocet, so I'm gonna stop rambling now before I make myself bawl. I miss my baby girl.
oh right yeah, you have a kid
did she go to africa too ---
so you kill your conscience, cry yourself to sleep