You're not making any sense. Are you seriously completely writing off the possibility that women could also negatively contribute to it?
No I'm saying these are choices men make themselves. People can tell you who to be, but if you make the choice to be that person, it's not "their fault" it's yourself. Even if you were to continue to make that argument that denies any sense of personal responsibility for one's actions, men still do far more of the pressuring and bringing up "welp women do it too!" is just clumsy deflection.
Something you seem to not be grasping is that toxic masculinity is generally indoctrinated in to men as youth. So it can be much harder to make the choice to not be toxic when toxicity has been normalized to the point that you don't know its toxic.
I don't believe in "indoctrination"... you always have a choice to see the impact of your actions and be someone else.