FCW - September 25, 2011
William Regal is back with Matt Martlaro? BOOOOOOOO! We want Byron! Someone brought a "Titus O' Neil DO THE DOG BARK!" sign. lol Maxine comes out with Norman Smiley and says that Bo Rotundo is injured so his Florida Heavyweight Championship has been vacated. Oh darn, that means I won't see any ever-so-surprising Spears now? What a shame. She announces that there will be an eight man tournament to decide the new champion. The contestants are Seth Rollins, Leo Kruger, Big E. Langston (LOL WHAT?), Leakee, Percy Watson, Damien Sandow, Dean Ambrose, and Husky Harris.
But Damien Sandow and Leakee will fight RIGHT NOW! Sandow's beard is looking more sophisticated now. Damien Sandow making Leakee look good in this match, which is a feat in itself. Leakee hits his terrible jumping forearm and then throws up his hand! PUDDUMAAAAAAAAA! (This is terrible for "Put 'Em Up") He hits his crappy diving fist and then Sandow tries to recover in the corner, dodges Leakee's attempt at a jumping forearm, then takes advantage and nails his neckbreaker for the pinfall! GO DAMIEN SANDOW!
Then Briley Pierce interviews Abraham Washington who gives a speech about how awesome Bo Rotundo is and blah blah. He says that Bo Rotundo is like the James Brown of sports entertainment.
Abe: You know who James Brown is, don't you?
Briley: Yeah, 007.
Abe: Boy, what is wrong with you!?
Yeah, Abe really wants to be the new Rock. And I think if he tries that hard at it that people will take notice if he tries in WWE. Abe says he sends his congratulations and condolences to whoever wins the Florida Heavyweight Championship, because he will take their title and make them the shortest reigning champ in history! Dear god, he isn't even trying to hide the fact that he looks like The Rock.
Anyway, next up is Audrey Marie vs Aksana for the FCW Diva's Championship. Audrey looks hot as hell. Caylee Turner (Alicia Fox's sister from Tough Enough) is on commentary because... well, I don't know but she sucks. She's only 23 years old!? I feel old. Caylee calls Aksana a mean jelly bean. God... When Caylee is asked what makes Aksana a good competitor she says "I think it's like, she has experience behind her. She's changed so much since I got here, and she's like, such a veteran in the ring? And I feel like they're evenly matched physically? Like in terms of strength." I feel ill. Aksana shows what a veteran she is with the worst kicks I've ever seen. Holy crap. And now Caylee is just giggling. Oh lord. Aksana failed to kick out of a victory roll, so Audrey had to kind of get off of Aksana and stand in front of her so she could kick her away. Aksana goes for her spinebuster, but Audrey counters it and hits a small package on Aksana for the win! New FCW Diva's Champion!
Matt: Are you aware we have a tournament for the new FCW Champion?
Caylee: I am aware! I'm so excited. 8D
I think I hate her.
We get a weird dark video of The Ascension talking about they will destroy and rise up. Ricardo wasn't there, so it was Conor O' Brian, Tito Colon, and Kenneth Cameron talking with Raquel Diaz trying to talk. Oh god, they gave Conor O' Brian his creepy laugh and sniff thing, but they sped it up at one point. Wooooah. Cool part.
Aksana is backstage and Briley Pierce tries to interview her while she's sobbing. He decides to leave and then Husky Harris walks up and tells her that she deserves everything she got! Aksana cries and says she's sorry and stuff and Husky apologizes for upsetting her. Wtf?
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