I wanted it to be a Choose Your Own Lesson type of a thing.
Like for the Hot Pocket one, the lesson could be:
Don't eat Hot Pockets.
Don't lay on your left arm.
Don't watch The Daily Show.
Never try to cool things off with your face.
Always try to cool things off with your face.
Go f*** yourself.
So many good lessons and I didn't have to do any work.
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Congratulations to Rafael Nadal on a Career Golden Slam. - The Mana Sword