Guiga frowned. "Oh but I've lost my weapon! Perhaps you could just let me hold it? It would put my heart and soul at ease and would give me inspiration!"
Dante's Alt scoffed. God damn, this moron needs to just punch himself in the face.
Guiga abruptly punched himself in the face.
3KL and Dante burst out laughing.
Dante's Alt was puzzled. Okay... that was weird... now he should... drop his pants and turn the treadmill to the fastest setting...
Guiga immediately did just that, as if he was in a trance and being controlled by Dante's Alt.
Dante and 3KL began to laugh even harder as Guiga fell and was launched off the treadmill with his pants around his ankles.
Dante's Alt realized that his Bible was more than what it seemed. It had the power to literally control other people! He decided it was best to keep this secret from his buddies... but he had one more thing for Guiga...
The overweight user managed to get to his feet and pulled his pants back up. He turned to the two Dantes that were laughing their asses off. "I realize now that no one likes me. It's time I leave this board... forever..." He turned to the window wall that had a beautiful view of the ocean. He ran toward and jumped, smashing right through the glass. He had enough velocity to clear lower decks and plummeted straight toward the sea.
Suddenly A narwhal jumped out of the ocean just in time to impale Guiga with its horn.
"Oh cool! A narwhal!" Mooed 3KL.
"Haha! That was awesome! That dude was such a jackass! Glad he did that..." Laughed Dante.
Down below, the narwhal shook the corpse loose and turned toward a camera. "Every story needs a narwhal..." It said in Oprah's voice. It then swam away.
"Good work, Dantes! Now let's go find some other people to f*** with!" Exclaimed Dante.
Suddenly, 3KL's miniguns began to whir. Before anyone could react, they began firing.
Dante went flying across the room as dozens of bullets riddled his body. By the time he came to a complete stop, he was just a pile of mush.
"WHAT?! WHAT THE F*** DID YOU DO, MAN?!" Screamed Dante's Alt dramatically.
"I DON'T KNOW!" Shouted 3KL in horror. "They just went off! I thought I have control of them but they just started firing! I didn't do it on purpose, I swear!" His eyes got watery with elk tears.
Oh I know you didn't do it on purpose... because you didn't do it at all... I did. People don't expect mains to be killed off before alts. That's just silly. You'll live for now, elk, but only because you're an elk, thought Dante's Alt, now a sinister sociopath because of his newly discovered power to use his Bible to manipulate other users. When it comes to Dantes, in the end, there can be only one... and that Dante will be ME!
"I swear..." repeated 3KL tearfully.
"Okay... I don't know how willpower-triggering guns work, and since you didn't shoot me too, I'm gonna give you the benefit of the doubt, but seriously, be really careful with those things and do not ever point them at me!" Exclaimed the sociopath alt. "It's not your fault that you can't control your powers. If you were a human, you could just shoot the guns normally. Clearly, this is the fault of whoever made you become an elk. We will find that person and murder him and/or her, and we will AVENGE our fallen leader!"
"Yeah! Let's do that!" Agreed 3KL.
--
ya right you are case the sunglasses have 3d so i can see right threw their clothes -ertyu
(about wearing sunglasses to stare at boobs without girls noticing)