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TopicITT: I watch every nationally broadcast episode of Mystery Science Theater 3000
Chronic1000
01/28/12 7:15:00 AM
#181:


Favorite Riffs (Short):

*Billy and Crash jump off a cliff and escape from Khan unharmed*

Servo: How they get off a cocky-doody cliff? This is wrong!


Crow: Billy looks like William Frawley (Fred Muntz from I Love Lucy.)


Favorite Riffs (Movie):


*while reading the credits we see the main star is Lon Chaney Jr.*

Crow: Any relation to Dick Cheney?

Joel: I don't think so.


Richard Chasen (narrating): Back in Los Angeles two men were sitting in a dinner listening to the news broadcast...

Joel: Oh, I've heard this joke.


*Detective Chasen is at a cutout of some dame named Eva Martin, looking at his watch.*

Chasen (narrating): I'm a cop, but my job is to ask questions and get answers.

Joel (as Chasen, to cutout): Alright, talk.


*Chasen walks into Eva's dressing room.*

Joel (as Chasen): I saw your sister outside. You know, the quiet one.


*The Butcher chokes out the scientist who revives him and his assistant at the same time.*

Joel (as Butcher): You know, I can't tell who is more fun to kill... It's a draw!


*We get a shot of several cop cars driving around.*

Joel: Be on the lookout for donuts. APP on donu-

Servo: Oh come on Joel that's really lame. No more of these donut jokes.


*The Butcher tries to prove he is who is to Eva, and proceeds to stab his hand with scissors*

Joel: I think scissors beats hand.


*The Butcher is angered and goes to kill Paul.*

Narrator: The name of Paul triggered his hate.

Joel: The name Gary made him happy


*Eva calls Squiny Ellis and informs him that The Butcher is alive.*

Narrator: Squiny didn't believe her and who could blame him? In a way you couldn't blame him. Who in their right mind would believe a man returned from the dead?

Joel: Only millions of Christians..


*Francine, another girl Eva works with, tries to work in Eva's place. She does a little dance to prove it's easy.*

Eva: I just thought of something...

Francine: Yeah?

Narrator: Eva agreed to let Fran-

Crow: Whoa! What happened to her voice?


*The cops are hot on the Butcher's tail in the sewers. They are using flashlights*

Servo: It's a gang of Sunday Night Mystery Movies!

Joel: Oh stop it.

Servo: Whatever you say, Mr. Donut joke.


*A few seconds after the previous riff*

Joel: Hey found half a donut, who wants it?

Servo: D'oh, not a sewer donut joke.. No!


Crow: This is sorta like Close Encounter's of the TURD kind.


*The cops spot the Butcher in the sewers where he buried his treasure, and shot him with an RPG. It's not very effective*

Servo: They're shooting him with chili peppers! They burn his guts, you see..

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