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TopicITT: I watch every nationally broadcast episode of Mystery Science Theater 3000
Chronic1000
01/09/12 6:49:00 AM
#138:


(For Some bizarre reason, I accidentally deleted the favorite riffs from S3E15 - Teenage Cave Man. This is simply a repost for that movie.)

Favorite Riffs (Short 1):


*A group of kids are water skiing for the first time*

Narrator: This is positively the first time for this bunch.

Crow: So you know they're gonna fail.


*We see a shot of the teacher of the above kids*

Servo: This is the teacher, Chad Slabbody. Hello Chad.


*A group of female water skiiers let go of the boat*

Narrator: See you later, girls!

Joel: Miles from the dock, and they can't swim!


*A skier shows off his board jumping*

Narrator: Notice his arms don't rotate like in snowboard jumping.

Crow: His arms just come clean off.


Narrator: This time the Mexican Jumping Bean will do a one and a half spin while..

Servo (quietly): Mexican Jumping Bean?

Crow: This time the white facist announcer will make a racial slur.

Servo (as Announcer): What do I know? I'm just a fat, pink announcer mowing down pretzels and cookies and trying tor come to grips with a wonderful life gone horribly wrong.


Favorite Riffs (Short 2):


*Ross the animal catcher is trying to catch a wildcat*

Ted the Narrator: This is where my boyfriend knows his stuff.

Servo: You don't have to say anymore, Ted.


*Ross chases down a baby bear cub*

Joel: Man, what I'd do to see that cub's mom coming through right now.


*Ross climbs a tree and tries to catch another bear cub. He steps on it's paw, making it scream in pain*

Crow: Joel, do they do this on Earth?

Servo: Isn't that wrong?

Joel: I feel deeply ashamed of my race.

Servo: Rightfully so.


*Ross cleans himself off with a towel after catching the cubs*

Servo: Ross tries to wipe away the evil, but it's not happening.


Narrator: In the Everglades, six feet of diamondback. Enough to scare you out of your skin.

Joel: Let's not forget who the real evil serpent is.


*A bear 'escapes', and we get footage of it's recapture (from underwater)*

Joel: Oh, they just so happen to be shooting footage underwater at the time.


Joel: We'd like to apologize to everyone, everywhere for this.


Favorite Riffs (Movie):


Narrator: In the beginning there was chaos...

*A bright light shines amidst the 'chaos'*

Crow: Oh, and then God showed up.


*One of the Cave Man talks to Symbol Maker's Teenage Son (aka THE MAIN CHARACTER)*

Servo: Look, he's got a saggy diaper that leaks.


Grumpy old Cave Man: When the fire comes back in the sky...

Joel: You mean morning?


*Teenage Son and a few other characters walk around a forest, presumbly nude.*

Crow: I know I left clothes around here somewhere..


Servo: You know, I could go for a chared grill hamburger sandwich and some french fried potatoes.


*We see the movie's 'monster for the first time.'*

Joel: It's me! It's Trumpy!

Servo: Oh yeah...


Caveman: On the sun's third rising..

Crow: We'll call it Wednesday.


*Robert Vaughn (the lead actor) seems to have invented the bow after he konks his noggin on a tree branch*

Crow: So let me get this straight, he knocks himself out and he becomes smart?

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