Lurker > GunslingerGunsl

3.5 years is the honeymoon phase? News to me. *shrug*

HornedLion posted...

I cant blame her for not stopping.

Huh? Why not? lol

LinkPizza posted...

Or they trust their partners... Which is a thing... Some people just trust the person their dating...

And that's a bad thing that you did. Not everyone is going to falter so easily. I've had tons of chances to cheat. And never do. Because I treat others the way I want to be treated... I don't want to be cheated on, and so I don't cheat on others...

It's weird how trust seems like such an outlandish idea to some people. People also seem to assume that if they didn't have the self-control to not cheat, that others wouldn't have it either.

deoxxys posted...

That being said, I cant speak for everyone as I only set my own rules as an individual but I would think most people wouldnt want their SO being with said opposite sex friend were they not all hanging out together at the same time. No matter how morally righteous you perceive yourself as, hormones exist and temptation is a real thing.

I acknowledge that my own experiences are not the same as everyone's, but I don't believe that temptation is a factor in some platonic relationships. I can spend time with my best female friend without ever feeling temptation. It's not that she's not attractive, it's just that I love her as a friend only. She also has a boyfriend who I'm really cool with now. Her and I actually could grab a drink together and both of our significant others would not give us crap for it at all.

DrPrimemaster posted...

Chicago?

Nah. A lesser-known city in California.

DrPrimemaster posted...

lol, y'all were trader joe's bros. I wonder if you'll run into him again.

I actually have. A few months ago I started working out with my friend who is a personal trainer. Most of the gyms were closed so there was almost no one at the private gym he worked at. While I was there, I ran into the same guy. He was a friend of that friend too. lol. I guess all extroverts know each other in my city. It's not really a small city either.

DrPrimemaster posted...

So people do do this, its not some challenge to himself to talk to people. I haven't been outside in so long and haven't seen this since college.

And what he said was interesting.

That is weird, was there any interaction based on this?

There was only like 8 of us at my friend's house that night so it was the subject of conversation for a bit. We were both tripping out over it. We were all drinking that night and started calling each other "Trader Joe's" as the night went on because that was the name of the store we saw each other at.

I'll probably get the J&J one so I only have to worry about getting one shot. Most of my family has been vaccinated now and none of them have had any significant side-effects. None of them had the J&J though.

I asked some random guy in a store if he knew where the soda was, once. It was half asking the question aloud to myself like wtf why can't I find it, and half asking him since he just so happened to be next to me. I sometimes have random conversations with strangers but most of the time it's because they talk to me first. Anyway, the guy I asked about the soda ended up walking into my friend's house whom I was visiting an hour later. It was a random coincidence that we were both going to the same place. Really weird. Haha

I know my girlfriend's pin and she knows mine, not because we feel the need to check eachother's phones and "verify" what we do. Only because we sometimes need to control spotify or Google maps on the other's phone. She gave me the pin without me asking but I would have never asked for it myself because it's private information that I don't feel entitled to. I've also never felt entitled to know who she's with or where she's at, mostly because it is just not something that comes up. We usually tell each other if we are going somewhere after work because why wouldn't we? We live together. One of my best friends is female and I hangout with her one on one and my girlfriend doesn't mind. I don't mind who she hangs out with either because I'm just not insecure about it at all. I mean, in reality if someone is going to cheat, they're going to cheat. I'm not changing who I am and what I do just because cheaters exist. When you're in a serious relationship with trust, those insecurities just don't exist. I've been in good and bad relationships and my current one is the best I've had. It just seems odd to even imagine being insecure about things like hiding pin codes and worrying about who your significant other talks to when I'm I a relationship like the one I'm in now. It's just such a non issue. I think the goal is to find a relationship with someone who you can feel this comfortable with. If you feel legitimately worried that your significant other is going to cheat on you, it's probably a sign that it's not a healthy relationship or that you may just need some therapy to work through your issues.

Edit: btw sunny, I realized that my post looks like it may have all been directed towards you. Lol. It's not. It's just my general opinion on the matter.

FrozenBananas posted...

Probably not

would your gf / wife like you to have female friends? I dont fuckin think so

Haha what? I'd never be with anyone who would ask me to give up my friends who I've known longer than them. Crazy.

wwinterj25 posted...

Yeah, well. Prove it!

Thanks. That topic is great!

I have. Ask Kwame. He has a pic. Lol

I didn't even realize that you couldn't feed them nectar anymore. I've noticed that I haven't been able to mount monsters by jumping on them anymore too. :/

I've always been told I have a very nice butt.

LinkPizza posted...

I think it might be more for me. Haha. Especially considering the weekends where I've stayed in bed nearly the whole time (usually having fun with whichever partner I was with). Like one of exes would come over, and we were rarely leave the bed the whole time. And my current BF, we can spend days (espeically when we're both off) not leaving the bed for things other than food and bathroom. And on my weekends alone, I'm in bed. And normally, on my time off, I'm in bed. Doing other stuff like playing games or youtube... I'm in my bed right now, actually...

I've been awake for an hour and been in bed waiting for my gf to wake up. Lol. I'm starting to get sleepy again and might fall asleep. >.<

I could have probably had a good workout already if I was motivated.

I spend probably more than 30% of my life in bed.

The game.

Both?

SunWuKung420 posted...

Knowing potd, they won't accept your apology nor will they apologize for being terrible.

If you believe this, why do you stay?

CoorsLight posted...

I think people don't want to talk about the gym with you because you have a smug, unapproachable attitude about it

I've never read clench's posts about the gym as smug.

Are you going to give her a middle name?

deoxxys posted...

I dont see why any average warm-blooded male would be okay with this.
I could literally ask this to every guy I have ever met no one would think this was alright.

I definitely don't think the "average male" would be okay with this, but polyamorous relationships and swingers exist so it's not too much of a stretch for me to imagine that there are some guys who are okay with their wives cuddling someone else too.

If they are comfortable with it and everyone is happy then good for them I guess. Personally, I wouldn't be okay with that but I'm also very unlikely to ever be in a situation where my girlfriend ever felt like she needed more affection. I'm a very affectionate and cuddly person. Lol

streamofthesky posted...

I really hope he's cheating on her, and thus lets her do this b/c it's "fair". That'd actually be less bad than what it's being presented as here.
Cripes...

This is kinda dumb and mean-spirited. Not everyone feels and thinks the same way. Not sure why you'd want to wish something like that on people you don't even know who might actually be much happier than you're imagining in your head.

Depends on how you measure strength.

hockey7318 posted...

Damn, look at you with your baby name already picked out ahead of time! I'm more of a procrastinator so we'll figure it out when we meet the baby and see what seems like the right fit.

It's weird, I've seen myself as a father probably since I was in my early 20's. I've always wanted a daughter to love, spoil, and protect. There are no girls on my side of the family. She would be spoiled rotten. Lol. I would not be upset at having a boy though. I'd almost prefer to have a boy first so that the he could learn to respect and protect a younger sister.

hockey7318 posted...

Have you ever actually invited her grandmother over for a three way to see if that is her actual reaction?

My oldest niece is Lilee. It's a great name and incorporates her grandfather, Lee, who passed a long time ago.

Naming the baby Benjamin after me was on the table when we didn't know the sex of the baby. Apparently Amanda really likes my name and was contemplating it for her first child too before it turned out she was having a daughter.

I'm quite fond of the name Melody for a girl. My girlfriend wants the name Zoe for a daughter so Zoe Melody it will be.

hockey7318 posted...

Honestly it really isn't fair that I'm this smart and attractive.

We should start a club.

ReturnOfFa posted...

I know I have a bad habit of 'dropping' therapy when I'm 'doing good', but I'd really benefit from a semi-regular, perhaps less frequent check-in. Obvs don't know the best solution, but I know I do a lot better when I'm checking in on the ole skull riot.

Missed your post post first time. I think check-ins are helpful even when you feel everything is okay. It's kind of like getting a yearly physical but it's for your mind. I'm actually required to go to therapy as part of my schooling and I always find there is more to talk about than I had expected.

wolfy42 posted...

Nobody is asking the real questions.

Did that person taste good?

Username checks out

Yeah, ya meathead!

hockey7318

Zeus posted...

You don't have to diagnose her with anything. That's what the professional is there for. And whatever it may actually be, they can help with that.

Not that I'd actually diagnose my own girlfriend, but that is actually my field of study which is why I said that.

supergamer19 posted...

Not really related, but, have you or your mom + boyfriend ever actually changed viewpoints during a heated debate? Is there an actual point to them?

There are things we can find that we agree on and that is pretty much the point. I see value in discussing things people disagree about to find common ground. Also, I think it is nice to have a reminder that you can argue passionately about something without hating someone or resorting to insults. I feel that happens too much, especially in politics.

Jen0125 posted...

Well, I'll be thinking of her and trying to send some positive vibes.

Thanks! :)

Jen0125 posted...

Hopefully she'll be able to address her anxiety. Sucks living like that.

Yeah, she used to go to therapy pretty regularly but hasn't for some time. She's been through a lot in her life. I've always admired how strong and responsible she has been. Her anxiety about some things can still bother her at times. :/

There's definitely some trauma and symptoms, but I wouldn't go as far as diagnosing her with PTSD. She might have met criteria at some point in the past though.

It really depends. I dont usually remember my dreams. I mostly remember the bad ones. Sometimes they can be interesting.

Muscles posted...

I was talking about clench lol

TC already has a girlfriend so it doesn't make sense to say he could get a girl if he wanted

I have no idea what TC looks like though

I completely misread your post and now I feel stupid. Haha.

Clench281 posted...

Well Chris is also good looking, so it works

Thanks! Pretty positive this has to be towards me this time! >.>

ReturnOfFa posted...

It sounds like you're at least on good enough terms with your mom + her BF to potentially discuss it with them? IDK if they'd hear you out or not in terms of telling them you'd like to keep the 'discussions' a little more tame when the gf is over.

This is a good idea. I was just thinking I'd send him and my mom a text about it.

Kimbos_Egg posted...

That just means shes weak. Throw a pokeball at her and shes yours.

Best advice yet.

ArvTheGreat posted...

Politics is stupid to argue about might as well shake your fist at some clouds

You say that as if I haven't already done that as well.

wwinterj25 posted...

https://i.imgur.com/dfRVE0p.gif

It's so cute. :3

Sounds like a job for Cesar Milan.

Muscles posted...

I used to drink 2 a day until about 2 months ago

Drinking just one too fast would have me bouncing off the walls. Did you have any caffeine crash when you gave them up?

I drink too many bang energy drinks. I have about 2 a week, but that's too many in my opinion.

Muscles posted...

Have you seen him before? He could definitely get women if he wanted

Thanks for the compliment. Appreciated.

Fam_Fam posted...

an incel?

Clench thought I was gay. Lol

HornedLion posted...

Yeah, you have to be mindful of that, TC. Trauma is terrible, and not something people enjoy having to live with. Hug her. Talk to her. All that good jazz.

I can get a little carried away in some situations especially if I've had a few drinks. I try to check on her and ask her if she's doing okay. We talk about everything though so we are pretty comfortable with eachother. There will still always be those situations where we are not completely aware of what we are doing in the moment. She felt much better after venting to me and I was able to hold her while she cried it out.

Clench281 posted...

Girlfriend?

For some reason I always thought you were

You know

Like me

I thought I had you on Facebook or Instagram. I have pics of me and my girlfriend.

Lokarin posted...

ye... me and my cousin are big time headbuttin' butt-heads when it comes to political debate; but my mom hates it and starts crying and then we all feel bad.

It sucks because it's not like we want them to feel bad.

Mead posted...

Yeah that is just how some people are

If you had an especially rough or abusive childhood, then conflict can trigger a genuine fear response and its natural for them to want to avoid that whenever possible

Yeah I get it. Plus, my girlfriend is much more introverted than I am. There are other situations we often find ourselves in where I am much more comfortable than she is. :/

We were at my mom's boyfriend's house the other day and he is very conservative in his politics, while I've always been more left leaning. My mom has apparently become more conservative in her views in the time she has been with him. Because of this, all three of us have sometimes argued pretty intensely over some things. We always stay respectful with eachother, but we can usually get pretty loud. All three of us are able to switch it off and talk about other things within a moment. My mom's boyfriend and I even started playing a game of chess and he offered me another drink nonchalantly in the middle of an argument. Part of me likes being able to have these debates with them knowing that we will still keep a healthy respect for eachother in the relationship. My girlfriend however completely shuts down. She doesn't like when people raise their voices because in her childhood it had always meant that bad things were going to happen. It's hard for her to not make those same associations with the arguments I have with my mom and her boyfriend. I feel bad because this most recent time, she even started crying once we got home because it was too much for her. I think I just need to make more of an effort to keep the politics out of the conversation when she's there with me. Does anyone else have similar problems when dealing with any kind of conflict?

Not really planning on it, so I dont think so.