Lurker > Anagram

Heroic Bigpun posted...

I know b8 has it out for me when it comes to not knowing song lyrics but I seriously thought that song was "love after love"

This is like when I thought I'm Blue had real lyrics.

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Started: July 6, 2005

Just curious.

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Tag

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Started: July 6, 2005

bwburke94 posted...

Currently stuck in FTE hell.

What do you mean? Just grinding all of the FTEs?

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Started: July 6, 2005

I voted Phantom, but my heart says Aristotle Means.

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Started: July 6, 2005

Why Kelsier and not Vin?

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Started: July 6, 2005

What other series have female villains who can be Wickedified?

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UshiromiyaEva posted...

The other woman is the actual villain of the movie and she was using a secret dog whistle to sick them on her.

Amazing, thank you.

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Started: July 6, 2005

Why'd they attack her?

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Leonhart4 posted...

YouTube didn't exist in 2003!

Holy crap, you're right. Pre-YouTube world is completely different, huh.

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Leonhart4 posted...

I've never felt so cheated by a video game than I did after I spent all that time getting 100% to unlock the secret ending, and THAT was what we got.

FFX-2 is why YouTube exists.

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FFX-2 is the only game Ive ever gotten 99% on and just felt no desire to get 100%.

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Mewtwo59 posted...

Oh, Vincent is way older than 30.

I actually didn't bother double-checking how old he was. Now that I think about it, isn't he like 50 or something?

Leonhart4 posted...

Yuna is the #2 waifu for the series

I'm not sure I agree with this! Though she is high up there.

Mac Arrowny posted...

Yuna is not in the top 50 waifus for the series.

Now this is definitely wrong.

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Started: July 6, 2005

Next Up: A waifu who would realistically be a complete nightmare to deal with

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14. Tifa Lockhart

Series: Final Fantasy
Nominator: Not_an_Owl (0/4 remaining)
Personal Familiarity: Yes
Attractiveness: 87 (12/145)
Personality: 91 (2/145)
Girlfriendness: 55 (87/145 tie)
Overall Waifu Score: 77.6
Hair: Brown (3/22 remaining)
Eyes: Red (0/11 remaining)
Race: Asian (6/58 remaining)
Age: 20-29 (4/59 remaining)
Medium: Video Game (12/85 remaining)

Im using the original FFVII for this writeup, because I dont have a PS4, and Square hasnt put FFVIIR on PC yet. And if youre wondering her connection to that weird number, its the damage multiplier on her highest limit break. Also, how weird is it that Tifa and Yuffie got nominated, but Aerith didnt? And yeah, I guess I have to use Aerith now, Ill live with it. Is it sexist that every FFVII woman has to be rescued at some point besides Scarlett, the evil one, but the men dont? Theres no scene where Barret is tied upside-down onto a Buddha eye while a fat guy perves on him.

I guess I should directly state this right up front: Tifa was one of the hardest waifus to rate the Girlfriendness of, because shes basically a terrorist? I dont remember if Tifa calls herself that, but Avalanche is what it is. Add to that the fact that while she technically does have a job, her job is that she runs a skeevy slum bar. I mean, Tifa is a world-class martial artist, but she seems to have little in the way of active ambitions for herself other than to get into Clouds pants. And honestly, who can blame her? Theyre purple. But then again, Tifa is also the only person willing to hang out with her boyfriend after he goes insane, pushes around his wheelchair, goes into the mindrape dimension to save him, can beat up a Midgar Zolom, and is really good with kids, so shes got basically every good girlfriend attribute except that shes even worse than a normal adventurer and has almost the worst job you could have. Although, its funny to think how much of the game would be different if shed just said I dont remember that, Cloud early on. I know why she doesnt, give me a break, its just funny and you know it.

I know that Tifa is like the defining video game beauty, and there is a good reason for that. I was going to make a two good reasons for that joke, but honestly, shes still really pretty regardless of how many boob jokes you want to make. I mean, to be clear, there are a million video game girls from the late 90s, and Tifa is the one who stood the test of time. Not Lara Croft, not Sarah Kerrigan, not even Jill Valentine (though maybe she could have, if she hadnt gotten edged out of the series by Chris). The only video game girl in the same league as Tifa in terms of waifu status is Samus, who has the advantage of an extra decade of legacy and a million more games. Where was I? Ah yes, Tifa. Shes not only the best FFVII waifu, shes the best Final Fantasy waifu in general. Whos even number 2? Rinoa? Yuna? Beatrix? Get out of here. Like, if I wasnt thinking about jobs and terrorism and other boring stuff no one is supposed to think about in terms of waifu status, and I gave her the Girlfriendness she probably deserves, shed be #2 on this list. I know because I checked my Excel sheet. This is unrelated, but I have to tell you how much easier my life has been since I learned more about how to use Excel. Would Tifa know how to use Excel? Probably not, so thats a -1 Girlfriendness point.

Its interesting that people mostly just remember Tifa for her looks, too, because shes actually one of the best waifus ever in terms of personality? I already went into this a bit, but basically, Tifas perfect as a person. Shes at least the best person in Final Fantasy VII, though I guess her competition is literally a thief, guy with tons of emotional problems, spousal abuse: the character, and what if your emo phase from high school lasted into your 30s. Tifa is empathic, helpful, kind, considerate, and not stupid. Shes not exactly smart, either, but she at least has, like, emotional intelligence? I would almost call Tifas personality as the perfect idealized waifu. Hell, even in the movie where Cloud is acting like an annoying jerk, shes still supportive, but still tries to kick him into gear and tell him to stop being dumb. Like, yeah, shes supportive and thinks about other peoples feelings, but shes also not a complete pushover. Aerith is fine and all, but there was only ever one winner in this fight, and it was always, always Tifa. By the way, little aside, making the demure girl the gutsy martial artist and the enthusiastic, energetic girl the healer was a stroke of genius. I havent played the remake, so I am also forced to assume it keeps in the part where Barret complains about climbing too many stairs, so Tifa calls him a word GameFAQs wont let me post.

Goddamn, when I think of big epic RPG tales, my mind inevitably goes to Final Fantasy VII, and when I think of the idealized heroine character in those games, I think of Tifa. Like it cant be emphasized enough how absolutely solid a waifu she is.

Im not really sure what else you can even say about Tifa. If she wasnt a skeevy bartender, shed be like the best waifu ever, as it is, shes still like the best waifu ever. Like, yes, I put her at #14, but basically anyone in the top 15 has extremely powerful waifu abilities. Tifa is such a good waifu that you might even say that her Heart is Premium? That Cloud is in Final Heaven? Eh? Ehhhhh?

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ninkendo posted...

Looking forward to Fast & Furious moving up the list next month

Are theaters making enough money to allow that?

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https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Film_series

It's worth noting that Wizarding World is boosted from #7 to #3 because of the two Fantastic Beasts movies, which is bizarre.

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xp1337 posted...

I actually miss that from P5 - the P3 cast would have different dialogue depending on relationship, costumes, certain party combinations (all senpais, all the second years, all girls, etc.) and P4 had your not-party-members sometimes randomly show up on previously explored floors and have dialogue that changed based on S-Link rank.

That sort of thing needs to be in more games, yeah.

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Pathfinder 2e

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This is actually amazing.

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I wish we got Investigations 3, though I don't know what it would be about.

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Espeon posted...

Mako-chan no!

Also, unless I missed something, Ive still got one waifu left in Hina.

You're right. I don't know why I even have an Excel sheet for this if I just constantly misread it.

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Mac Arrowny posted...

Ann as construction worker Majima too good.

Missed this one, it's pretty good, yeah.

Mac Arrowny posted...

Ayane is optional. You get her if you go for band instead of drama.

That explains it. The other girl I also didn't really remember, though.

Mac Arrowny posted...

At least his romance is hilarious (not intentionally).

I've seen screen shots of it, isn't it the main character falling in love with him despite him being a third grader or something, and Akihiko being annoyed? That has to be intentional.

Leonhart4 posted...

Also don't be dissin' Yuko

Yuko gets dissing for me thinking of her as the most obscure Persona waifu, even though she's not.

azuarc posted...

I feel like that clue should make sense to whoever knows the character. Clair de Lune's in 5/4, so I don't think it's Kaede, but 5/8 (without the +2) does look like a time signature.

It is 2 and 5/8s, I couldn't figure out how to represent that in ASCII text without looking weird somehow.

Leonhart4 posted...

I don't even remember this argument we had about Yusuke!

After Yusuke learns that Madarame is responsible for his mother's death, he reacts the same way he reacts to everything, which is stoically with determined anger. I was like "This is the most emotional thing you could ever possibly learn, he should have cracked at least somewhat" and you were like "no way man." Those may not be exact quotes.

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Snake mannnnnnnn

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MarquessLaus posted...

Devil May Cry

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Next Up: A waifu associated with the number "2 and 5/8s"

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15. Makoto Nijima

Series: Persona
Nominator: Inviso (0/4 remaining)
Personal Familiarity: Yes
Attractiveness: 62 (77/145 tie)
Personality: 80 (10/145 tie)
Girlfriendness: 89 (9/145)
Overall Waifu Score: 77
Hair: Brown (4/22 remaining)
Eyes: Red (1/11 remaining)
Race: Asian (7/58 remaining)
Age: 15-19 (9/62 remaining)
Medium: Video Game (13/85 remaining)

Ive been putting off doing Makotos ranking for a while, because shes one of the first waifus Ive actually cared about outside of the context of this list. Were into the actually liked by Anagram as a waifu part of the list. My first Persona game was Persona 5, and I zeroed in on Makoto as soon as she showed up. Thats right, she was my actual Persona 5 waifu. #2 was Kawakami. And just so were clear, Im basing this ranking on P5 and P5S, but not P5R, which I havent played.

I guess Ill get the bad out of the way first. When I think of Persona 5, I think of a few things. That time I lost 45 minutes of progress because an enemy used a one-shot kill spell on me. How awesome the first villain, and only the first villain, is. An argument I had with Leonhart over Yusukes personality. And the time Makoto demanded I have 5 charm to progress her social link when everything else that needed stats required 2 or 3. Like, what the hell was that? I need to go on a double date to save my friend from sex slavery, but Ill only accept the handsomest fake boyfriend for a one-night fake date? And lets not even go into the time she announced she can take of herself and then immediately got captured by the yakuza.

But Makotos got a number of really good qualities, too. Shes sort of hard to describe if you havent played P5, but shes basically the mostly serious girl who feels bad about being powerless, and the second she gains power, decides to keep everyone on track and save the world with her belief in justice and love of punching things. And only punching things. She claims she knows aikido, but then all of her attacks are just punching monsters with brass knuckles, so Im pretty sure she was just lying.

No, but seriously, Makotos defining attributes are that shes really smart, motivated, and hard-working, which are all good qualities in a waifu. I like the moment when she joins the party and realizes that everyone is actually a complete idiot with no plan, and the only way anything is going to get done is if she does all of the work that isnt just killing monsters, so shes just like okay fine Ill do everything from this point on and then basically everyone else except Joker, Morgana, and Futaba is just along for the ride. That holds true in P5S. Its comical how pointless everyone is in P5S except Joker, Morgana, and Makoto, and Makotos only contribution is that she has a drivers license.

I enjoy how Makoto looks all prim and proper and all that, but then her Phantom Thief form is a post-apocalyptic Mad Max warrior and shes actually very tomboyish. It belies both how everyone in Persona has more to them than appears on the surface (except Ken, why the hell does Ken even exist, most pointless party member ever this side of Umaro) and how Makoto in particular seems really well-put-together, but is actually insecure about a million things and has pent-up frustration over her life. I guess her flaw is meant to be that shes critical of people, but spoilers she mostly only criticizes Ryuji, whos a lazy idiot. I know shes supposed to also have lots of dorky moments that make her more relatable, like being scared of the dark and stuff, but I played P5 years ago and the only one I remember is her trying to hide behind a book while tailing you in the school, and it being hilarious. TVTropes says that she has stereotypical Yamato Nadeshiko traits, Ive gotta disagree, I never got that feeling from Makoto at all. Like, she doesnt look like one at all and shes not demure or anything, she looks like a prim and proper schoolgirl.

Also, I should say this briefly about Makotos attractiveness: shes good, but shes the worst P5 girl. Luckily, she makes up for it in every other way. But while doing this writeup, I was accidentally exposed to Persona 5: Dancing in Starlight, which I didnt realize gave dancing redesigns to every character. Makotos is the best because leather jackets and gloves always look good, Harus is the worst because its meant to look princess-y and instead just looks silly, and Futabas is the funniest because its the same thing she normally wears. This is very minor, but she also has the best winter outfit. I like how the main characters get different clothes during winter, but then everyone else in the game just wears their normal spring clothes because Atlus isnt springing for a second character model for everyone in the game.

I didnt remember this until I looked it up, but Makotos goal in life is to become a police commissioner, which is a very specific goal? Not just a cop, but a police commissioner in particular. Thats actually a shockingly good waifu job. I said before that cop waifus are quality, and that remains true. I guess Im overlooking the fact that Makotos got a big inferiority complex and obsession over her sister, but I dont think thats going to be a huge problem in a relationship, honestly. Sidenote: Ive seen people say that Sae is the best waifu in P5, and while I do agree that shes most attractive P5 waifu (and has the best Shadow design of any character), shes also kind of a bad person? Shes not evil or anything, but shes clearly way out of line in the way she talks to Makoto, so Ive got to disagree here.

Anyway, Makoto. Theres really not much else to say about her. Shes just a really hardworking, cool, intelligent waifu whos the best girl in her game. Of course, the best Persona girl overall is obviously Ayane. No, what I actually did was go onto the Wiki to look up the name of the most obscure girl I could think of, which was the gyaru girl from 3 (Yuko), only to find Ayane and be like I literally do not remember this character, so I had to switch the character for the joke and now that Ive overexplained it its ruined.

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Started: July 6, 2005

Who voted Klavier

I want names, dammit.

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I dont know, para. Phoenix probably couldnt have put together that Key + Lock = Open Lock.

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15.

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Snake5555555555 posted...

Yeah because I don't want to click on a button to see results.

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I really like how Edgeworth Sr.s talking animation is him moving his hand up and down. I dont know why that stood out to me.

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I saw that Reinhardt also gets two flame strikes at once and can cancel his charge.

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colliding posted...

I am delighted to recognize Ron Delite and mediocre waifu (according to Anagram) Desiree Delite

I was shocked and very happy when they showed up.

colliding posted...

And I must disagree with Anagram's assessment of Desiree - she's beautiful, loyal, and rides a motorcycle - what's not to love?

Leonhart4 posted...

What's not to love about Desiree is that you'll be bankrupt within a week

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~ Breaking Waifu News ~

Apparently, there was an interview recently with the director of Super Mario 3D World, where he said they considered adding Daisy to have a second female character, but decided she "wasn't special enough," and should be replaced by Rosalina.

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Hm

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Not_an_Owl posted...

Mai's theme happens to be an absolute bop: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XE0bblXqgJA

Not bad. Fighting games tend to have okay themes most of the time.

Mewtwo59 posted...

It's probably easier to list the characters left who don't have something in hair.

I actually didn't realize that so many waifus had something in their hair. My mistake.

Paratroopa1 posted...

Surprisingly, I've never heard of this character, but the answer for trans women is probably going to be 'positively, due to wish fulfillment' with a dash of 'could we ever just have one normal trans person though', though how respectfully the story treats the issue will determine whether it's idolization or reclamation (hi, danganronpa 1)

Neat, always cool to get other perspectives.

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Leon must be the most inconsistently written character in video games. Every appearance, he has a completely new personality.

https://twitter.com/NetflixGeeked/status/1394820101078065152

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Next Up: A waifu who wears something in her hair

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16. Mai Natsume

Series: BlazBlue
Nominator: Not_an_Owl (1/4 remaining)
Personal Familiarity: Yes
Attractiveness: 89 (10/145)
Personality: 67 (38/145 tie)
Girlfriendness: 74 (25/145 tie)
Overall Waifu Score: 76.6
Hair: Blue (1/7 remaining)
Eyes: Purple (1/8 remaining)
Race: Asian (8/58 remaining)
Age: 15-19 (10/62 remaining)
Medium: Video Game (14/85 remaining)

Dont think I dont know what you did here. Mai is just the most famous example of magical genderbending, isnt she? I cant think of a bigger example, at least not in video games. Well, the jokes on you, because it turns out shes actually a pretty good waifu no matter what the weird plot of her games is. In complete honesty, I actually do sort of wonder how LGBT people view characters like this, but I also suspect that a dorky waifu topic is probably not the appropriate venue for that discussion, so, so be it.

I would say that Mai is probably peak generically anime cute. Do you know what I mean by that? In a medium and art style with zero lack of cute anime girls, Mai still manages to stand out. And its not just her completely insane clothing. I dont even know what shes wearing. Okay, according to the Wiki, that thing on her neck is a big golden zipper piece. I guess Ill be the one to ask it: what is it zipping up? Because the front of her torso clothing (I cant call that a shirt) doesnt have a zipper, and there is clearly no back. Is this another Kingdom Hearts thing, except theyve gone beyond the need for zippers at all, and now its just the little thing you grab to unzip something? God, thats not even the dumbest thing Ive seen a waifu wear in a video game, thank God no one nominated Alice from Zero Escape. Anyway, as youve probably guessed by now, I do have a thing for waifus with long, luxurious hair, and Mai fits the bill, so good for her on that, at least.

Mais got a fairly standard energetic, forthright, helpful anime girl personality. I may have slightly overranked her, to be honest, but its okay. It should be noted that for this, I used Mais post-character development personality. Again, Mais a weird, awkward case to rate thanks to being our only genderbending waifu, but basically my ranking of her only accounts for Mai after shes come to terms with a magical anime book turning her into a girl. As happens, in anime, I suppose.

Can I ask, whyd they give Mai a spear? Seems like a random weapon choice for a noblewoman/schoolgirl type of character. Was it just because theyd used swords a billion times and wanted something else?

What surprised me about Mai, and what I did not know from her game, is that shes actually super, ridiculously wealthy and powerful, or at least the heir to all of that. Ill be honest and admit that I dont really follow BlazBlue lore, I kind of gave up after realizing there was a million-year-old ten-year-old nigh-omnipotent vampire girl. I like to think that I have a high tolerance for silly weeaboo shenanigans, but I guess BlazBlue is the limit between where Im willing to go and where Im not.

Where was I? Mai. So, shes the heir to one of the twelve families who basically control the world (as youd expect, all of the most important and smartest people in the world are Japanese), but her father mistreats her to make sure shes worthy, blah blah blah. Im going to skip to the end here Mai verges on princess territory, not in every way, like the explicit royal duties sense, but at least in the I was born way more powerful than you could ever hope to be sense. Unlike some princesses, shes at least very modest about it and not even remotely noble-ish (Im not a huge fan of like a traditional noble bearing, as you might have guessed), which is to her benefit, but it still Well, I guess what this comes down to is that obviously there are a lot of benefits to being stupidly wealthy, like being able to buy a house on Ocean Avenue (I once walked to the Santa Monica Pier, saw these tiny houses on the beach with like one bedroom each and zero privacy from the outside thanks to their giant outdoor wall-windows, was like I wonder how much those cost, and checked it out, and its like 2 million dollars for the crappiest one), but I also feel like theres going to be a sort of inherent imbalance of power between you in a relationship, unless youre also a gazillionaire (which I am not).

This is different based on the type of princess or heir, obviously, like if youre the princess of a tiny country rather than a giant empire or something, thats different, but Mais the heir to a family that controls 1/12th of the world, which if you translated that to land use terms would be like dating the princess of the United States plus India. I realize that someone might object to me categorizing Mai in princess-esque terms given how little it impacts her actual personality or storyline in the games (shes way more concerned about earning her distant fathers approval than anything else related to her bloodline), and yes, Mais actual family is so thinly sketched out that all I could find about it is that it employs assassins who like poison and that it has four maids, one of whom is named Julian. But her status is definitely going to come up, and I think its something to consider. Like, tell me that you think thered be zero problems with a waifu whos the CEO of like Microsoft or Apple or something, you know there would be. So, it knocks some points off Girlfriendness. Also, yeah, she verges on adventurer territory as well. Technically, Mai is a soldier, but the nature of BlazBlues world makes them almost the same thing.

Anyway, Mai is a really excellent waifu who does everything well, and I can easily see why shed be someones favorite waifu, but Im perfectly aware that none of that is why she was nominated. She was nominated purely for being a meme, which is fine, because waifu ranking topics are inherently silly.

Lastly, I just want to throw out there that Mais alternate dimension evil form is incredibly stupid-looking, and whoever designed it should just be ashamed of himself.


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I also read it. I don't really like Tony that much, but I can say about the double Annies thing is that I think the author just didn't realize how interesting an idea that was, and wrapped it up in a really underwhelming way when it would have been cooler to keep it going.

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Wonder why the account got nuked.

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CasanovaZelos posted...

Judy Garland - Over the Rainbow

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LeonhartFour posted...

I was thinking of doing best non-Phoenix/Edgeworth lawyer and best non-Maya assistant.

I also thought about doing a round of best musical themes (like best courtroom theme, best victory theme, best cross-examination theme, etc.).

Reasonable.

andylt posted...

Best "OBJECTION!" shout imo

Edgeworth's original objection, of course.

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What else is there after this besides like best judge?

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Speaking of, I just posted another chapter.

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~ Breaking Waifu Alert ~

Apparently, Tali's photograph was changed in the new version of Mass Effect. This probably would have affected her attractiveness rating. I guess we'll have to live with an imperfect retconned Tali ranking, now.


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You're nuts, Ibuki's great.

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Mac Arrowny posted...

I can imagine a human beating a lion barehanded. I can't imagine a human beating a grizzly bear barehanded.

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hombad46 posted...

Yes, you do. You need to get her and Iwai's stores open before you really start exploring palaces, and she examines Futaba after you clear her palace

Man, I didn't remember that at all, thanks.

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