Current Events > What's the deal with ghosting?

(+) Yeah! (+)

Can you please quote people correctly?

you can block me if it bothers you.

TC ghosted us lmao

Fluttershy posted...

Can you please quote people correctly?

you can block me if it bothers you.

No desire to block you. But what is the point of doing it? I assume no one likes it.

No desire to block you.

then it's not my problem.

bsp77 posted...

Can you please quote people correctly? This is annoying.

At this point I'm pretty sure Fluttershy refuses to use the actual quote function because not using it makes it harder for people to follow the actual context of the conversation when they're replying to people.

Fluttershy posted...

No desire to block you.

then it's not my problem.

why do you quote people oddly like that? what is the point, other than to make people think you're weird? do you enjoy making people think you're weird?

don't mind my fan club.

None of us need to justify something that can avoid a confrontation nor do we need to display some aspect of courage in dating of all things.

that's true. i guess the point i was trying to make is that manipulative people are aware of the honor codes people follow in these types of interactions and they leverage them.

This means that you're factoring in their learning, in your method of rejection.

no, it doesn't. at no point did i say you had to teach them anything.

you misunderstood my post. badly. it's not the end of the world.

[LFAQs-redacted-quote]

Like I said:

TMOG posted...

At this point I'm pretty sure Fluttershy refuses to use the actual quote function because not using it makes it harder for people to follow the actual context of the conversation when they're replying to people.

It's for trolling purposes, especially when they snap and start having a meltdown.

Fluttershy posted...

None of us need to justify something that can avoid a confrontation nor do we need to display some aspect of courage in dating of all things.

that's true. i guess the point i was trying to make is that manipulative people are aware of the honor codes people follow in these types of interactions and they leverage them.

This means that you're factoring in their learning, in your method of rejection.

no, it doesn't. at no point did i say you had to teach them anything.

you misunderstood my post. badly. it's not the end of the world.

Are you going out of your way to incorrectly quote posts?

Fluttershy posted...

don't mind my fan club.

lmfao what a clownpost

TheGoldenEel posted...

People dont take rejection well

This. And I'm sure people get told, it's not gonna work out,to only get begged for another chance or get insulted

well that's bullshit. just got a message from the moderation staff about "misusing the report message function" for marking this clown's weird and confusing way of quoting that they're obviously doing solely to annoy people, saying that users are not required to use the site's quote function and to just block or ignore them instead. fuck that. it is blatant trolling.

good. you can just block me instead of shitting up any thread i post in.

Fluttershy posted...

don't mind my fan club.

Try not to break an arm over there.

Shut the fuck up

block me instead of whining. you were on ANT. i expect better of you, specifically.

not so much these other dudes, but you were on forums back in the 90s. come on ash.

Try not to break an arm over there.

i don't follow.

Fluttershy posted...

good. you can just block me instead of shitting up any thread i post in.

any thread you post in? dawg this is the first time i've ever seen you pull this shit. you seem to have an inflated sense of self importance.

also you are the one shitting up this thread.

also you are the one shitting up this thread.

no, it would be the fan club showing up and whining about how i post instead of just blocking me.

just block me. i'm not gonna miss you.

I don't care if you've known me for 30 years. You're being purposely obtuse and it disrupts the flow of conversation.

well i am certainly wounded by your words but you still have the ability to just block me instead of disrupting any topic in which i post.

Fluttershy posted...

also you are the one shitting up this thread.

no, it would be the fan club showing up and whining about how i post instead of just blocking me.

just block me. i'm not gonna miss you.

I don't care if you've known me for 30 years. You're being purposely obtuse and it disrupts the flow of conversation.

well i am certainly wounded by your words but you still have the ability to just block me instead of disrupting any topic in which i post.

shut the fuck up

Fluttershy posted...

not so much these other dudes, but you were on forums back in the 90s

it's not the 90s anymore. there are better ways of doing things now. quit being a luddite.

shut the fuck up

you can get the website to shut me the fuck up for you, you know.

i'm not changing.

Fluttershy posted...

good. you can just block me instead of shitting up any thread i post in.

Says the person shitting up every topic they post in by deliberately not using the quote function so it becomes all anybody talks about.

If you get a better gimmick, people will stop talking about how much your gimmick sucks in every topic you post in.

any thread i post in.

*in which i post.

sorry.

so is this topic about ghosting or my posting style? because when considering who has been disruptive to this topic you probably have to consider which of us tried to shift the discussion one way or the other.

users are not required to use the site's quote function and to just block or ignore them instead

like, right there. that's the solution to any perceived disruption you think i'm causing (and not the people making a scene over it). block me and move on. i won't even notice.

[LFAQs-redacted-quote]

I think if a mod comes in and sees how Fluttershy has been responding it will become crystal clear that it's trolling and deliberately being disruptive. The problem is that reporting a message only presents that message in a vacuum without any of the context around it.

If they really didn't want to derail/disrupt the topic, they could just ignore everyone instead of egging them on to reply more.

[LFAQs-redacted-quote]


i did mark it as trolling, because that's what it is. there is no option specifically for disruptive posting.

Fluttershy posted...

so is this topic about ghosting or my posting style?

you made it about your posting style, so i don't know why you are asking anyone else about it.

you made it about your posting style

no, i didn't.

Fluttershy posted...

you made it about your posting style

no, i didn't.

yes you did, by posting that way.

that's not how that works at all. it was made about my posting style the second someone took the time to bring it up.

just block me if it bothers you so much. really, dude.

you can make the website do that for you! like, hello??

I want to point out that every time Fluttershy chooses to respond with "just block me, I won't miss you", they're deliberately making the topic more and more about their quoting gimmick and encouraging people to respond in kind, when they could actually just take their own advice and block the other user instead if they really didn't want everything to be about how they post.

Classic hypocrite and/or trolling behavior.

And Warned

I don't take it personally. It's their problem, not mine.

Cotton_Eye_Joe posted...

You know this thing, right? One minute you're chatting, texting back and forth, its all good vibes, then boomvanished. No explanation, no goodbye, just poof, like they got abducted by aliens or something.

I mean, when did we decide that dating is now part of the paranormal world? You go from making weekend plans to suddenly wondering if you need a Ouija board just to get a response. You text againnothing. Did they forget how to use their phone? Is there a secret underground society of people who just can't handle saying, 'Hey, not interested'?

And what's their exit strategy here? Do they think Im just gonna forget they ever existed? Like, oh yeah, I imagined that whole relationship. They think we're out here with memory loss like a Men in Black moviezap, gone from my brain!

You know what I think? If you're gonna ghost someone, at least commit! Send a message like, 'I am now leaving this plane of existence. Please contact my afterlife representative if you need me.' Because at least then, I'd know youve truly crossed over to the other side!"

Im not reading through 3 pages of this topic but this reads like a Seinfeld bit and it wouldnt surprise me if this was tcs attempt at a Seinfeld bit

Fluttershy posted...

that's not how that works at all.

Shut the fuck up.

Now that we can get back on topic, I have had to ghost a friend group before.

I had played FF14 with them for about 10 years and we were pretty close, but gradually we started to lose members until there were only a few of us left. A new person got brought in who was kind of toxic (but it was "okay" because they were friends with another member of the group), and another person started getting way too possessive of everybody's time and stopped seeing her therapist and taking meds so she could instead exclusively lean on us for that kind of thing, which often led to having to talk her down from suicidal thoughts because a raid went poorly.

The final straw for me was when I was playing Mario Kart with another friend group, and she messaged me asking if I wanted to download VRChat and just spend the night doing absolutely nothing. I told her that I was playing the other game but could join her later tonight, and she started laying the heaviest guilt trip I've ever seen on me, accusing me of not wanting to be friends anymore because every time she wanted to do something I was either busy or going to sleep -- I should note at this point that she would usually message me to play games at or after midnight, and I was definitely in bed because I had work in the morning. Yes, she was aware of this.

So I decided that I just needed to cut things off cold turkey. I stopped going to that Discord server entirely and stopped replying to messages and texts. It wasn't the most graceful way of handling the situation, but it was probably the best way to avoid a further breakdown or additional guilt-tripping.

tripleh213 posted...

And Warned

Finally

[LFAQs-redacted-quote]


I think a lot of girls operate on this mentality, based on their previous experiences, which is valid

But as a veteran of the apps(not proud of it) and someone who learnt after the 2nd or 3rd person "how to do it" when I'm up to my 10th and 11th person that I've met and I'm receiving what I feel to be a clumsy, lazy way of cutting the cord, it can feel a little demeaning

The feeling of "oh she must have thought I was one of those guys" is not pleasant.

Anyway, I'm sure this contradicts some stuff I said yesterday

The story from post #41 really messed me up. Its like I encountered the most reddit obsessed, trendy, knows how to ethically date person possible and they just completey exposed themselves as not caring about anyone but themselves. Severe main character syndrome (she also had BPD). She made so many.... unfair assumptions about me before we met. And then several after

Her explanation for being peeing in front of me was some kind of "I don't see gender, if you do then that's on you" type vibe, yet she was hyper focused on male red flags and other crap like that ya know. And also a lot of my female friends told me "yeah okay so she's saying that, but we don't normally pee in front of each other the first time we meet"

Anyway it made me re-evaluate so damn much

Fluttershy posted...

you can get the website to shut me the fuck up for you, you know.

Successfully, as it turns out.

Quit making everyone else's experience worse because you can't figure out how to press a quote button.

It's actually easier for everyone involved, including you.