Current Events > REMINDER: "Super straight" is transphobia!

(+) Yeah! (+)

loafy013 posted...

Remember, super-straight guys are nasty. They don't wash their genitals or butthole because touching those means they are gay.

They also apparently have to recolor pro-trans content if all the ss "memes" I've seen have anything to include.

Which is to say some pro-lgbtq+ channels I'm subbed to did videos ripping on anti-LGBTQ+ "memes."

GrandConjuraton posted...

Got some tags ITT, so that's nice.

This isnt our first rodeo

Theres always someone who is trying to open up transphobic lines of attacks and accuse us of trying to force lesbians to sleep with us or that people must be attracted to us or they are a bigot.

Its really sad and transphobic.

Cant we just tell people to date whoever theyre attracted to, and not be hateful towards the ones they arent, without having to label every single viewpoint?

KitKats posted...

This is false and Im not sure why you are so hung up on this line of attack towards me.

Some self examination is probably in order, I imagine. Thats on you though - I cant do that work for you.

Because your stance is basically the same thing as telling a man in a relationship with a trans woman that he "isn't straight," but your weird righteous indignation prevents you from seeing how hypocritical you are.

KitKats posted...

This isnt our first rodeo

Theres always someone who is trying to open up transphobic lines of attacks and accuse us of trying to force lesbians to sleep with us or that people must be attracted to us or they are a bigot.

Its really sad and transphobic.

Well, surely you would have known it would happen when you made this topic, >.< . When I read the title, it was the first thing that went through my mind.

Nemu posted...

Because your stance is basically the same thing as telling a man in a relationship with a trans woman that he "isn't straight," but your weird righteous indignation prevents you from seeing how hypocritical you are.

L

TimeForAction posted...

Im attracted to feminine features. Ive encountered several trans people in my life but no amount of surgery and makeup has been able to make them pull it off in my book. Im happy that they are living their best life but its just not my sexual preference

lol

basically the same thing as telling a man in a relationship with a trans woman that he "isn't straight,"

Except only one person has made that connection.

You

KitKats posted...

Its certainly something to say about putting in the work and individual responsibility, if that includes therapy too. No one can do that work for you, but it still requires that knowledge and education to do in the first place and unpack those prejudices.

Most people are too busy simply trying to live and survive to put in the work to fix their fears. I would argue that its good enough for people to recognize their fears and try to avoid letting them impact their lives and how they interact with others. Giving into their fears and choosing a path of prejudice is obviously wrong, but having the time to dedicate to therapy is something that not everyone has.

As another way to put it, I think expecting no one to fear me is an unrealistic expectation. I know some people will be afraid of me simply based on past trauma or societal brainwashing. But I still expect people to try and treat me respectfully, and in turn I will do the same. The few who have openly admitted to their fears Ive even tried to be extra cautious and respectful towards, because I recognize theyre dealing with a psychological issue and trying not to let it impact their behavior in a negative manner.

Kindness and understanding is a two way street. No one should be apologetic about who they are, and everyone should have the right to proudly embrace their identity. But there is a blurred line there where your comfort can come at the expense of someone elses discomfort. The goal should be that were all open to communication, empathetic, and try to find solutions to protect the marginalized while respecting everyones mental health.

It's perfectly possible to not be sexually attracted to any group without having an irrational hatred of them. But this super straight thing all just seems so . . . unnecessary.

Is there a point in declaring yourself to be 'super straight' beyond a thinly veiled announcement of a dislike of trans people?

I wouldnt blur the line between someone not apologizing for who they are (in terms of identity, e.g., nationality or ethnicity, sexual orientation, gender) and someone who is unapologetically bigoted.

Those arent the same thing and it shouldnt be conflated.

[LFAQs-redacted-quote]

Too many cis het men are absolutely terrified they might accidentally have sex with a trans woman, or even share a kiss or dance.

Many cis men carry a very real fear of being perceived as gay by friends, family, peers, coworkers. Its shameful how homophobia is perpetuated in this way, it hurts people, and we see it being defended still including here as we make slow progress to raise awareness.

GranAures posted...

Except only one person has made that connection.

You

This is another example how homophobia and transphobia are perpetuated. Thanks for pointing that out GranAures.

This user cannot dictate other peoples sexuality to say you are gay/bi or cant be straight if a man is intimate with a trans woman. He may identify as bi, or straight, but Nemu doesnt get to make that determination.

You can be straight, it doesnt mean you must be straight.

Thats the beautiful thing about labels, as tools they can help communicate our identity without letting them box us in.

A straight man may be attracted to a trans woman but the fear of how their peers or social circle will react is too real. They have to navigate who to tell, how and when they reveal that information. This is the reality of a transphobic society.

[LFAQs-redacted-quote]

Yes! Thank you

KitKats posted...

I wouldnt blur the line between someone not apologizing for who they are (in terms of identity, e.g., nationality or ethnicity, sexual orientation, gender) and someone who is unapologetically bigoted.

Those arent the same thing and it shouldnt be conflated.

Exactly, and thats what I was trying to point out. Some people do blur that line, and it can make discourse very difficult.

So far Im enjoying this topic, but there do still seem to be some lingering questions.

I don't care if you're from Iran.

KitKats posted...

Absolutely. Some people are only looking for casual, no strings, etc. as well.

Alternatively, straight men can date a pre/non-op trans woman. That doesnt make him gay or bi.

Oh I absolutely agree that dating a trans person doesn't make you gay(and even if it did, there is nothing wrong with that.)

bigblu89 posted...

Please pardon the old man in me, as I have never heard this term prior to this...

So, if a man is not attracted to a pre-op trans woman, that makes them transphobic?

No.

but thinking that being attracted to a pre-op transgender woman would somehow make you unstraight is transphobic.

TimeForAction posted...

Im attracted to feminine features. Ive encountered several trans people in my life but no amount of surgery and makeup has been able to make them pull it off in my book. Im happy that they are living their best life but its just not my sexual preference

This is my stance minus me encountering several trans ppl in my life. Only trans ppl I see are on tv or online.

"we can always tell"

[LFAQs-redacted-quote]


No, Im not attracted to men. I have a question for you ppl wanting to open up our preferences on who we date/find attractive. Why? I thought you ppl were all about live and let live?

[LFAQs-redacted-quote]

Theyre invalidating trans people because they see being trans as like wearing a costume - he even agreed with the other person being transphobic who said they cant pull it off.

This is all based off their imagination and stereotypes of trans women being a man in a dress, like in some outdated British comedy.

shyguybry posted...

No, Im not attracted to men. I have a question for you ppl wanting to open up our preferences on who we date/find attractive. Why? I thought you ppl were all about live and let live?

No one cares about you opening up your preferences.

KitKats posted...

Whether or not you consent to being intimate with someone is different from attraction and sexual orientation.

To put it more simply, if someone is attracted to women, that does not mean only cis women. Sexual attraction doesnt work that way, and its transphobic to say your sexual orientation is only cis people, or that its not possible to be attracted to someone/anyone solely on the basis because they are trans.

Many people operate on stereotypes or cliches, but trans people actually come in all shapes and sizes, as do cis people. Being attracted to women doesnt automatically mean youre attracted to every cis woman, either. You can be attracted to one woman but not another.

I really can't wrap my head around bolded. You can't just tell people how their sexual attraction works.

what kitkats is saying is one cant know if a woman is cis or trans just by looking at them. so to say "im only attracted to cis women" comes off as either ignorance or a dogwhistle

[LFAQs-redacted-quote]


Yes, I have limits/preferences, whatever you want to call it. I hope this doesnt come out wrong, but for example I dont like or rather not attracted to women that have the whole Kardashian filler/plastic body going on. Do others find that attractive? Of course, but I dont and thats me.

The rest of my post is asking why do you care (not you specifically, just generalizing) about my preferences? Its 2024, we date who we want. Live and let live.

Also sorry about the you ppl, I was just matching your energy tbh.

Most of them time I usually see the term "super straight" as being used ironically or making fun of someone who is insecure about their "sexuality" like "oh yeah buddy, I'm sure you're super straight like a ruler." when that said person said something transphobic.

bigblu89 posted...

Cant we just tell people to date whoever theyre attracted to, and not be hateful towards the ones they arent, without having to label every single viewpoint?

Ideally yes. The whole "super straight" thing was started by transphobes who refused to admit that they could be attracted to transgender women. So they made a big stink about it online, announcing that they were only attracted to cisgender women.

KitKats posted...

Many cis men carry a very real fear of being perceived as gay by friends, family, peers, coworkers. Its shameful how homophobia is perpetuated in this way, it hurts people, and we see it being defended still including here as we make slow progress to raise awareness.

Yeah, I read an article that talks about this. It was really illuminating and made a lot of sense when I thought about it. They're afraid of being perceived as gay by their social circles. And in their mind, all it takes is one "wrong move" to be permanently labeled as gay. A sort of zero tolerance policy for their sexuality.

Hopefully that mentality dies out over time.

Dungeater posted...

what kitkats is saying is one cant know if a woman is cis or trans just by looking at them. so to say "im only attracted to cis women" comes off as either ignorance or a dogwhistle

We also had that guy who was asking, but what if she has a penis?

Like, you cant tell that just by looking at someone whats in their pants. Unless shes naked! And even then its not going to be anything like a cis mans penis, and more like a large clitoris. Theres so many misconceptions about trans people.

MEGAsoldier posted...

I really can't wrap my head around bolded. You can't just tell people how their sexual attraction works.

Right, which is why if youre attracted to women, you cant logic your way out of finding a (beautiful) trans woman attractive. You might be scared people think youre gay, you can deny it to friends and play stubborn, and even exercise your prerogative to not date trans people. Some people refuse to date others based on skin color, too.

But people who say they only find cis people attractive is not a valid sexual orientation.

KitKats posted...

Right, which is why if youre attracted to women, you cant logic your way out of finding a (beautiful) trans woman attractive. You might be scared people think youre gay, you can deny it to friends and play stubborn, and even exercise your prerogative to not date trans people. Some people refuse to date others based on skin color, too.

But people who say they only find cis people attractive is not a valid sexual orientation.

What if it has nothing to do with a penis or being "perceived as gay"? What if I am not interested in sex at all but just have a weird set of very particular niche fetishes that only a cis woman is able to fulfill?

MEGAsoldier posted...

What if it has nothing to do with a penis or being "perceived as gay"? What if I am not interested in sex at all but just have a weird set of very particular niche fetishes that only a cis woman is able to fulfill?

Then youre asexual.

not superstraight.

MEGAsoldier posted...

What if it has nothing to do with a penis or being "perceived as gay"? What if I am not interested in sex at all but just have a weird set of very particular niche fetishes that only a cis woman is able to fulfill?

That sounds like some flavor or shade of the ace umbrella, my friend. Heterosexuality doesnt work that way. If you dont find people attractive based on appearance that is valid and you may be demi sexual, or sapiosexual as Gladius chimed in earlier.

BrohammedAli posted...

Then youre asexual.

not superstraight.

Yep!