Current Events > *NEW* Study Says That 45% Of Men Have NEVER Approached A Woman!

(+) Yeah! (+)

Inohira posted...

Within reason, I mean. As long as you were cheerful and respectful while doing so it was tolerable to approach a woman in public.

This is still the case. It hasn't actually changed as much as some men assume it has.

Does "approaching" mean something special in English, like "sleeping" does?

DoctorPiranha3 posted...

It takes more confidence to approach a woman in real life than sending messages online. It also shows her immediately what you're like in person.

And guess what, women love confidence...

I know women like confidence, which is why I make sure they think I have it lol

That doesn't change the fact that both can work.

bsp77 posted...

I know women like confidence, which is why I make sure they think I have it lol

That doesn't change the fact that both can work.

No one said online can't work, just that approaching IRL is more impactful and can yield better results

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Ok

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Well I'm fucked

DoctorPiranha3 posted...

No one said online can't work, just that approaching IRL is more impactful and can yield better results

But that isn't necessarily true. Plenty of men have success with one, or with the other, or with both. 2/3s of new relationships start with dating apps.

The cold approach only generally works if someone is being social and going to bars or events or other gatherings where there is more potential and they are more open to being approached. I always advocate being more social. Randomly walking up to women at stores and on the street rarely works unless really good looking or charismatic.

It is simply not worth risking a potential lawsuit or jail time. Just saying "Hi" to a woman or shaking their hand can now be considered assault.

Gladius_ posted...

Also TC is an incel not a PUA as he has already admitted he has never been with a woman and doesn't even have friends.

Ideologically he is a red pill PUA, he does not promote incel beliefs, he supports online dating despite incels believing it's impossible to succeed there unless you're a top 20% male and reposted a Tweet telling men not to waste time waiting for a better dating environment even though incels believe that trying to approach women at all is the waste of time.

Someone being a friendless virgin obssessed with dating stats does not automatically affiliate them with incels.

B18Champ posted...

It is simply not worth risking a potential lawsuit or jail time. Just saying "Hi" to a woman or shaking their hand can now be considered assault.

Oh, shut up

Ive yet to see a case of someone getting into legal trouble for saying hi to a woman.

Dark_Arbron posted...

Ive yet to see a case of someone getting into legal trouble for saying hi to a woman.

Or even for asking a woman out a single time and respectfully and assuming no power dynamic (boss, teacher, etc)

Much of CE has scared themselves into staying single for no good reason.

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Actually, you can find success in online dating if you have extremely good pics/poses/lighting/decent filters, a decent bio, and you're on multiple apps on top of messaging multiple people. That doesn't mean online dating doesn't have it's difficulties(ghosting, constant flaking, ONS if you're looking for a relationship) but it's absolutely a viable tool

Jiek_Fafn posted...

Girls always came up to me. Approaching is not a skill that I had to learn

Must be nice.

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As far as I'm aware, that individuals point is that it's not ideal to wait until you're 30's to start the dating game. When you're younger and in relationships, you'll experience stuff like ghosting, flaking. jealously. clinginess, infatuation, arguments. it's best to go through stuff at an earlier age so you know what to look out for/not to look out for, and how to act in certain situations or deal with problems

A person who has had a lot of experience from their highschool years-college years with dating or relationships is going to have more experience than someone who didn't actively meet people and kept to himself.

KogaSteelfang posted...

Must be nice.

Hang out at bars enough and be social with friends and such, and it will inevitably happen to just about everyone

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I never said online dating is easy. Just that one can find some success if they are constantly going through the motions and doing whatever they can.

Online dating has it's own set of problems. But I still think it's more viable and realistic than joining clubs to date or trying to build a platonic friendship in a span of several months with the off chance that something romantic starts

Im older than that but I get it in this day and age. You just walk up to a broad the list of shit that could go bad is way longer than what could go right.

Its all online now, people think youre up to something.

bsp77 posted...

Hang out at bars enough and be social with friends and such, and it will inevitably happen to just about everyone

Unless youre ugly and stupid (like me).

But what separates me from an incel is that I know thats not womens fault, nor do I resent them for it. It also doesnt frustrate me since Im not interested in companionship.

KiwiTerraRizing posted...

Im older than that but I get it in this day and age. You just walk up to a broad the list of shit that could go bad is way longer than what could go right.

I mean

Gladius_ posted...

Doesn't help that there's a plethora of bad advice in the red pill community coming from people who don't have a clue in what women want that have no problem presenting misinformation about what we want.

The red pill is telling men that they need to get out approaching women no matter what, because even if they don't have a good grasp on what women want and are likely to fail they'll at least gain experience and become more comfortable doing so.

The anti-red pill tells men to be considerate of women's feelings and desires and whatnot while pursuing them. Which is cool for men who can manage it, but beyond the capabilities of guys with poor social skills. So the latter group just ends up not approaching, because that's the only way to guarantee they don't make women uncomfortable. This group becomes too sensitive to how women respond to them.

Problem is most men can't get away with the latter behavior because men are still mostly expected to approach. So the red pill mentality, despite risking toxic behavior, still provides a performance boost over the more gentle anti-red pill approach if the man is too shy/awkward to pull the latter off.

Gladius_ posted...

You are unfamiliar with the user then and his new gimmick argument. His argument has been that approaching women is a waste because the future is online dating and that success via approaching women is impossible but that dating online is also rigged because while it's your best bet women only care about the top 1%.

He is desperate to prove approaching doesn't work so that he can then in turn prove online dating only works for a certain subset of people and therefore by proxy most guys no matter how hard they try are doomed and undesirable.

He's an incel.

Interesting. That level of roundabout scheming is above my pay grade but I guess it's possible.

LiberalAgenda8 posted...

trying to build a platonic friendship in a span of several months with the off chance that something romantic stars

I would never recommend that. But the broader your social circle, the more friends you have, and the greater chance that happens. If you even want it to. I wasn't trying to get with my friends, but it did happen occasionally and now I am marrying one of them.

The difference is becoming friends with women in hopes of sex vs becoming friends with women because you value them as friends and human beings. I was never friends with my fiance because I wanted more. It just happened.

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I think people need to have the total package or a variety of things when it comes to success. Looks alone doesn't cut it for long term, for example.

Also, people change their mind. What someone thought in their 20's, isn't indicative of what they'll believe in their 30's. Or even a year or two ago.

Being active online doesn't prevent doing the above. You can even be friends with women while also pursuing people online and cancel your online if you end up building a relationship with a friend or you can maintain the friendship if you find someone online.

One doesn't mean you can't do the other. Remember when you claimed I suggested otherwise and I copied and pasted quotes of me suggesting that over and over again? Yeah.

I think that if you want a relationship or something casual, then online is an ideal way for both people to express or mutually get what they want.

I've only approached a woman once... and that was 13 years ago... Haven't wanted to try again since...

LiberalAgenda8 posted...

Also, people change their mind. What someone thought in their 20's, isn't indicative of what they'll believe in their 30's. Or even a year or two ago.

Yeah there's a lot of drifting from one philosophy to another in the manosphere.

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the online subculture as we know it has been going on for almost 20 years at this point, but otherwise, you're entirely correct.

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If you really want to shut someone like that down, all you really have to do is point out that even a man as unpleasant as Alex Jones was married even before he became famous. He got married while batting 0 for 3.

willythemailboy posted...

If you really want to shut someone like that down, all you really have to do is point out that even a man as unpleasant as Alex Jones was married even before he became famous. He got married while batting 0 for 3.

Alex Jones isn't that ugly. Y'all haven't seen ugly.

Men are too scared to approach because they're so scared shitless about being labelled a creep. Online communities are teaching these boys that being seen as a creep is one of the worst things that can happen to them, they're under the impression that even taking a shot will get them labelled as a creep, so many don't even try. Also, online loves to glamorize the "top 1%" of men and women and tries to make it seem like that's the norm. Men see clips of multiple women saying stuff like "my man needs to have a 6-figure income, be 6 feet tall and have at least a 6-inch penis" and think a majority of women think like this because that's what you see online. When men see that they don't meet the requirements, then they fall into the rabbit hole of hating women. And the reverse is also true, the few men that are actually approaching women are typically that type of men that will approach multiple women at the same time, these women will see guys as pigs who only think about sex or if they unwillingly get into a relationship with one of them and then find out afterward that they've been cheated on then these women will fall into the rabbit hole of hating men.

I could believe this actually. Speaking from personal experience, the last time I legit asked out a girl in real life, face to face, was 17 years ago back in middle school and promptly got rejected in front of kids spiraling for a couple years with my already set in depression/self-harm that I was already doing prior.

So I mean, after that, it's been really hard for me to get past that and I've had even more issues with my health and relationships since. Online dating has failed me because I view myself as unattractive and I take horrible photos tbh. Idk, don't get me wrong, I don't really blame any of this on any other person but myself, but it's nice to know others haven't really done anything either.

radical_rhino posted...

Most women never approach a man in their life.

This is also something that I'd really like to see the numbers on. It's really only fair to see it lol. It's got to at least be 85%+ that aren't.

Voidgolem posted...

I suspect having everyone borderline burnt out by the grind is not conductive to relationship building efforts.

How are you burnt out if you've never even approached a woman

Tyranthraxus posted...

How are you burnt out if you've never even approached a woman

He means the job grind.

Tyranthraxus posted...

How are you burnt out if you've never even approached a woman

who has time to approach a woman when they're working 3 jobs

bsp77 posted...

Yeah, that info is blatantly false. Men in their 30s and 40s can do quite well.

How is what he said false?

The dating pool does get smaller as you get older. It just gets harder to meet people and build skills as you get older.

DrPrimemaster posted...

How is what he said false?

The dating pool does get smaller as you get older. It just gets harder to meet people and build skills as you get older.

No it doesn't. At least not for men. Women are far more open to dating older men than men are to dating older women. As you get older, the dating pool just grows for men. The only thing that might get smaller are if you're specifically looking for people closer to your age.

Maybe we can raise it to `100% someday.

Jiek_Fafn posted...

Girls always came up to me. Approaching is not a skill that I had to learn

this

Eh, I accepted my fate as a forever alone fourteen years ago when my prom date ditched me and I just stood around for the rest of the night just watching everyone else.

Goten55 posted...
my junior prom date ditched me; my senior prom i took two dates

don't give up hope so easily (except for society)

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true, it's definitely a lot more mainstream than it was then.

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