Current Events > Does your partner's body count bother you? Is there an acceptable range?

(+) Yeah! (+)

I have a body count of 25 (at 27) and someone stopped getting to know me because of it. Do you have a preference?

I have a significantly higher count than my SO so def not.

Ive dated someone with a higher though and didnt care. Dont see any reason to judge them on their past

Ill never understand why people are weird about this. No, it doesnt bother me, my gf are neck and neck actually (30+ for each of us) and I only know this cause a friend of hers brought it up the other day for whatever reason.

My wife and I had each only slept with one other person before we met

Too many bodies gets hard to cover up after a while.

Anything more than 0 is absolutely haram!

I could understand if like one side was a virgin.

But if both sides have already been around town that shit is Even Steven. Only way it wouldn't be is if one was a literal corn star and perhaps leaving something disturbing to the imagination.

I wouldn't dream of asking someone about their past history.

It's none of my concern.

My girl has only ever been with me, which is pretty nice. Kinda wish I could be the same way for her.

My partner and I don't know each other's body count. It's irrelevant and frankly none of the other's business, because neither of us brought any STDs into it.

Nah but then again, I date guys.

Villain_S_Fiend posted...

My partner and I don't know each other's body count. It's irrelevant and frankly none of the other's business, because neither of us brought any STDs into it.

If the number ended up being 300 how would you feel

I don't think it matters as long as it doesn't increase while I'm with them?

The body count doesn't make a difference whatsoever.

I'm a virgin so I can't date a sex haver. That would be betraying my virgin comrades. TC at 25 sex you are a threat to my people.

Not nearly as much as the 'body count' colloquialism itself.

It's not how many, it's who you choose to sleep with.

My gf did share her body count with me and it doesn't bother me. But both of our numbers are pretty low. I don't think a high body count would be a deal breaker, necessarily. But I would be a lot slower to trust a partner with a huge (100+) body count. "Does she really care about me, or am I just another lay?"

Mine is higher than my partners, but that didn't bother her. If anything, prior experience can be a good thing because you'd be better at pleasing your partner.

This is a stealth brag topic btw.

Me and my wife had a couple of exes before we met....

But also does anyone care solely about the body count? What if its just like a couple of exes but each was for a couple of years so you banged them both like literally a couple hundred times each?

penguin223 posted...

I have a body count of 25 (at 27) and someone stopped getting to know me because of it. Do you have a preference?

User Info: penguin223
User Since: Jan 2006
Karma: 792
Active Posts: 3

so your actual "body count" is 0 right

Wait, are we talking about murder?

LordMarshal posted...

This is a stealth brag topic btw.

Me and my wife had a couple of exes before we met....

But also does anyone care solely about the body count? What if its just like a couple of exes but each was for a couple of years so you banged them both like literally a couple hundred times each?

body count is the amount of different partners you've slept with. and trust me, 25 is nothing to brag about

As long as the number doesn't continue to go up after we've established that we're exclusive, no.

I was admittedly a bit... Questionable, in college, but my partner is okay with it, and there is a firm understanding that, as long as the number doesn't climb while we're together (on either side), who cares?

Damn, I feel like a dirty hoe.
You guys think double digits are bad.

Damn I'm an ole skank.

I don't get why high count be like "I don't see why it matters" to low count people. Obviously you don't, otherwise you wouldn't be high count. >_>

Some low count people believe intimacy should only be shared with someone you love. High count people either had different views on the matter, or went through a lot of breakups (which is it's own concern). There's a compatibility issue there. Nobody wants to think they might be attributing more importance to a relationship than their partner, or more likely to stick around.

Alternatively some low count people wanted to have a bunch of sex but missed out, in which case they may be resentful towards a high count partner and feel it unfair to settle down before reaching similar levels of experience. Some of these are the types who feel like they're "buying the cow after others got the milk for free."

Others are just generally jealous/paranoid people and, regardless of their own count, are hypocritically possessive.

Obviously the justifications get worse as you go on, but how someone feels is how they feel.

How have we made 30 posts without a Clerks reference?

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=94wGndbOIPk

Is "25" really the number you'd go with to brag though? Yeah that's low to me, male or female. Unless you're the type who is under 10 and only sleeps with someone you're seriously committed to/you're married.

DementedDurian posted...

Wait, are we talking about murder?

Wait is everyone not? i wouldn't bang anyone who can't maintain a quota of 5000 a week

I couldn't possibly care about any of partner's (dating or just fucking) body count

It just doesn't matter if you have confidence in yourself and the person you're with.

Edit: That being said, girls ive dated have given me the side eye about my number much more than women i was just sleeping with

Again: do we care about low body counts where you were with a few people for years and have literally banged them a couple of hundred times over that period of being with them?

I dont care about it

I don't take women who kill people.

LordMarshal posted...

Again: do we care about low body counts where you were with a few people for years and have literally banged them a couple of hundred times over that period of being with them?

That is a completely seperate matter. Most people who want a relationship with someone don't care if they had a relationship in the past. It becomes a bit much to ask that they've just never been involved with anyone before you.

A lot of people don't have casual sex, though, so that's more reasonable to expect.

Inohira posted...

That is a completely seperate matter. Most people who want a relationship with someone don't care if they had a relationship in the past. It becomes a bit much to ask that they've just never been involved with anyone before you.

A lot of people don't have casual sex, though, so that's more reasonable to expect.

One person could have banged 25 people once while the others been in 3+year relationships with 2-3 people and had sex literally hundreds of times.

Im asking if the count is literally only about body counts. Like youre not "insecure" that theses years long relationships have literally banged many many many many times in every which way...

LordMarshal posted...

Again: do we care about low body counts where you were with a few people for years and have literally banged them a couple of hundred times over that period of being with them?

We're talking about the number of different partners. Number of times with a single partner is irrelevant. Having sex with 1 person, 500 times, is very different from having sex 1 time with 500 people.
Inohira posted...

I don't get why high count be like "I don't see why it matters" to low count people. Obviously you don't, otherwise you wouldn't be high count. >_>

Some low count people believe intimacy should only be shared with someone you love. High count people either had different views on the matter, or went through a lot of breakups (which is it's own concern). There's a compatibility issue there. Nobody wants to think they might be attributing more importance to a relationship than their partner, or more likely to stick around.

This is similar to where I'm at. It doesn't matter to me unless their body count is really high (triple digits). Like anecdotally, I've known a few guys who reached 100+ and they were really, really bad at maintaining long term relationships. I'd be worried that if I dated a woman with a really high body count, she'd have similar relationship issues. It wouldn't necessarily be a deal breaker, but I'm all about long term commitment (my last relationship lasted 10 years), so it would make me very wary of her level of commitment.

I am never going to judge what people find important in a relationship. Some people care about that and some people dont. If couples communicate honestly and freely, this and most other issues can be resolved.

But I am pretty old, and at this point I know one thing for sure: If a person can bring themselves to not worry about a partners past relationships, that is what they should do. Zero that is good or constructive can come from worrying about a partners past. There is a lot to lose, and very little to gain by making it an issue.

Unless your partner needs support (coming out of an abusive relationship etc), the best thing to do is focus on the future and not the past. There is absolutely nothing positive that can come from dwelling on water that is already under the bridge.

My fianc and I both only had sex with one other person before we met. No biggie.

penguin223 posted...

If the number ended up being 300 how would you feel

Impressed lol

No
My number is kind of gross and my wife never asks for much detail or even ballpark numbers. She knows its a lot and leaves it at that. If I didn't know that I was her first, I'd like to think I would've taken a similar approach.

I don't care.

LordMarshal posted...

One person could have banged 25 people once while the others been in 3+year relationships with 2-3 people and had sex literally hundreds of times.

Im asking if the count is literally only about body counts. Like youre not "insecure" that theses years long relationships have literally banged many many many many times in every which way...

Insecure people will find any reason to be insecure. Of course there'd be insecurity about the ex. That's why for a long time the conditions for marriage were outright virginity and a person was considered soiled if they had had premarital sex.

Ive been with 50+ people and nobody Ive dated has ever cared about that. I think its really going to depend on the type of people youre dating though. Im poly and in California so, generally different attitudes.