Current Events > I feel like I'm being taken advantage of by a student. Am I petty?

(+) Yeah! (+)

Let me preface by saying that I'm a guy - rather unattractive and objectively overweight - and other student is a girl. It started off as friendly conversation and small talk but now I feel like she's asking for something every time. She sits behind me in class and she has been asking me for a copy of my notes every now and then. I've been kind so far, and have given her notes on every module. But I can't help but feel that her sense of gratitude is lacking and that she's taking advantage of me. When I missed class and asked her for a copy of her notes, she made up some excuse and said she would email me later, which she ended up not doing. Of course I didn't bring this up with her as I was afraid of confrontation.

Note that I bust my ass taking these notes and I even take the effort to modify them when I get home. The class is a bit difficult but it's designed in a way where if you pay attention and take notes, you'll pass. 90% of the class is dependent on being conscientious enough to pay attention and process the notes in your own language. I feel that by her copying my notes, she's not making the effort of trying to learn on her own. She's skipping the note taking process (which takes a lot of work) and is just reaping the perks of my hard efforts. I feel the inclination to sit in a different spot during class time but I'm also afraid of making the situation awkward. Should I just sit somewhere else and not care? Am I being overly petty about this and should just give her my notes?

She is cheating. Tell her to go to your professors office hours for questions and to record the lecture if she has trouble with notes

Either just give her the notes or don't. If you give her the notes, don't expect anything in return as she has already shown she will not even be willing to help you out in the event that you miss class.

[LFAQs-redacted-quote]


If Aeriis is being this forceful you know it's the right thing to do

Maybe talk to her and tell her how you feel

[LFAQs-redacted-quote]

You're right. I shouldn't anymore. But how should I go on about doing this? Can I just show up to class and just stone wall her?

Iamdepressed posted...

You're right. I shouldn't anymore. But how should I go on about doing this? Can I just show up to class and just stone wall her?

My suggestion: secretly record the class and then tell her you didn't take any notes.

[LFAQs-redacted-quote]

Yeah this. She's cut off.

Iamdepressed posted...

You're right. I shouldn't anymore. But how should I go on about doing this? Can I just show up to class and just stone wall her?

Give her misinformation a couple of times, she'll stop asking.

This seems like a great opportunity to practice not being terrified of incredibly mild confrontation with practically no stakes involved.

What class TC? Maybe this is a required class for her degree that has zero to do with the job she is seeking. Maybe she has her own obligations to support herself or family and the last thing she needs is to fail a class she doesn't understand just so she can attempt to find job security for a decent living.

College sucks and exploits people who are already at a stacked disadvantage. Cost of living is sky high now, wages are suppressed, and jobs that support a base living income are hard to come by for those without a degree. Stop being petty TC and just give her the damn notes. Yeah she's taking advantage of you, but that's a by product of capitalism. She is forced to do so.

you dont even have to confront her. just make an excuse yourself why you cant give the notes. do to her what she did to you. simple.

Eh unless she was a jerk or leading you on, I would just share the notes. Costs you nothing and helps someone else. Though if you feel like note taking is such an important part of the class then you should never have started sharing them to begin with.

Since she doesn't seem to take notes herself that's probably why she gave you the runaround when you asked for hers, but that's just a guess. I try not to assume the worst in people but ya never know.

Either dont do it anymore or sit somewhere else. Really though who cares if someone cheats in school? Its all a massive waste of time that doesnt prepare you for the career itself. If its really important and leads to a career then its not like shell even qualify for the job later on anyways. If it doesnt affect you at all then I wouldnt care.