Current Events > Wizards shitting their pants is still the greatest piece of Harry Potter lore

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NeonTentacles
04/03/23 11:28:58 AM
#1:


https://gamefaqs.gamespot.com/a/user_image/7/0/2/AAfWomAAEWP2.jpg

God bless Britain

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Questionmarktarius
04/03/23 11:30:06 AM
#2:


obligatory ProZD:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=D1RMITgiPyk
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Zikten
04/03/23 11:48:39 AM
#3:


I still wonder wtf she was thinking when she came up with that

Wizards can't at least use medieval methods of toilets?
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Blightzkrieg
04/03/23 11:51:11 AM
#4:


Why didn't Doctor Strange just teleport Thanos to the great wizard-shit mountain

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MC_BatCommander
04/03/23 11:53:26 AM
#5:


You think students would just shit in the classroom during lectures or did they have like a privacy screen

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Prestoff
04/03/23 11:56:25 AM
#6:


I think it's their way of showing that Wizard/Witches tend to be behind on technology because of their heavy reliance on magic.

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Zikten
04/03/23 11:58:51 AM
#7:


Prestoff posted...
I think it's their way of showing that Wizard/Witches tend to be behind on technology because of their heavy reliance on magic.
Yes but even the medieval society that wizards cling to, had toilet solutions in history.
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#8
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LincolnDuncan
04/03/23 12:06:57 PM
#9:


They do this in stat trek too.Just beam that stuff into space

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Verdekal
04/03/23 12:08:15 PM
#10:


I mean to be fair, modern plumbing techniques didn't even exist until the late 19th century anyway. Before that there were outhouses or large manors and castles had shit ducts that lead outside or the dungeon or something.

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Unsuprised_Pika
04/03/23 12:10:30 PM
#11:


LincolnDuncan posted...
They do this in stat trek too.Just beam that stuff into space

Beam it into an enemy ship.

"It is a good day to die of dysentery"

"Assimilate THIS"

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DrizztLink
04/03/23 12:11:54 PM
#12:


Verdekal posted...
I mean to be fair, modern plumbing techniques didn't even exist until the late 19th century anyway. Before that there were outhouses or large manors and castles had shit ducts that lead outside or the dungeon or something.
Yeah, and those shit ducts weren't in our pants.

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A_Good_Boy
04/03/23 12:13:38 PM
#13:


Zikten posted...
Yes but even the medieval society that wizards cling to, had toilet solutions in history.
The people in those societies were shitting into pots and then tossing those pots into the street. Plumbing was a huge problem and the rivers would smell like putrid heaps of garbage. I don't think it's too far out there that a wizard would see their surrounds, covered in shit and filth and disease, and prefer making all that disappear with a wave of their wand.

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#14
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Questionmarktarius
04/03/23 12:27:01 PM
#15:


ProfessorKukui posted...
that means that somewhere out there there's a place with a whole lotta wizard doodoo
Wasn't that the basement, where the bigass snake lives?
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mario2000
04/03/23 12:29:36 PM
#16:


Questionmarktarius posted...
Wasn't that the basement, where the bigass snake lives?

no wonder it wanted to kill everyone

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#17
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sauceje
04/03/23 1:37:48 PM
#18:


Are we all somehow forgetting the big ass-bathroom that is pivotal to the plot of the second movie/book???

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Zikten
04/03/23 1:41:36 PM
#19:


sauceje posted...
Are we all somehow forgetting the big ass-bathroom that is pivotal to the plot of the second movie/book???
Rowling says that bathroom is fairly new. It wasn't always in Hogwarts
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sauceje
04/03/23 1:42:47 PM
#20:


It was already abandoned because of Moaning Myrtle tho
Man I guess wizards really do be walking around just shitting themselves, the muggle-borns must be like "yo wtf though"

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DarthDemented
04/03/23 1:42:54 PM
#21:


This thread doesn't even come up if you type "shitting" into the topic search bar

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DarthDemented
04/03/23 1:44:52 PM
#22:


ProfessorKukui posted...
that means that somewhere out there there's a place with a whole lotta wizard doodoo
I imagine at some point in the plumbing there's a charm that still magics it away somewhere.

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wanderingshade
04/03/23 1:49:04 PM
#23:


Even Romans had plumbing and flowing water. I think Just Kidding assumed toilets were invented in like the 17th century and didn't even bother to check.

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Zikten
04/03/23 1:52:35 PM
#24:


wanderingshade posted...
. I think Just Kidding assumed toilets were invented in like the 17th century and didn't even bother to check.
That would not surprise me. She doesn't seem to do much fact checking or much work into logical world building
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ToteAll
04/03/23 1:54:29 PM
#25:


Is this in Howgarts Legacy?
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Ricemills
04/03/23 2:01:41 PM
#26:


I don't think they meant the wizards shitting their pant, just that they take a shit wherever they like (assuming nobody watched) and simply vanish the evidence.

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ToteAll
04/03/23 2:07:32 PM
#27:


Ricemills posted...
I don't think they meant the wizards shitting their pant, just that they take a shit wherever they like (assuming nobody watched) and simply vanish the evidence.

It literally says "wherever they stood".
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masterpug53
04/03/23 2:08:19 PM
#28:


Ricemills posted...
I don't think they meant the wizards shitting their pant, just that they take a shit wherever they like (assuming nobody watched) and simply vanish the evidence.

Technically they didn't wear pants - iirc it was tradition for wizards to wear nothing under their robes. Pretty sure one traditionalist old fart at the Quidditch World Cup was complaining about having to wear pants because he loved the feel of the wind blowing between his [censored for comedic effect].

So in this case 'shitting their pants' and 'shitting wherever they wanted' are functionally identical.

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Prestoff
04/03/23 2:08:47 PM
#29:


ToteAll posted...
Is this in Howgarts Legacy?

There's bathrooms in Hogwarts Legacy. Though it's always empty and you never see anyone actually go into them...

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Ricemills
04/03/23 2:38:35 PM
#30:


ToteAll posted...
It literally says "wherever they stood".

They could have squatted in the same spot they were stood.

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DrizztLink
04/03/23 3:01:25 PM
#31:


masterpug53 posted...
Pretty sure one traditionalist old fart at the Quidditch World Cup was complaining about having to wear pants because he loved the feel of the wind blowing between his [censored for comedic effect].
He was supposed to be wearing Muggle clothes and decided on a nightgown or something similar, completely the opposite.

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ToteAll
04/03/23 3:01:39 PM
#32:


Ricemills posted...
They could have squatted in the same spot they were stood.

It doesn't say that though.

Is it really that wild that an unhinge transphobe like JK Rowling actually meant "shit their pants"? She's unwell.
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divot1338
04/03/23 3:20:59 PM
#33:


You ever think one of those wizards started to like the feeling and they just stopped vanishing the poop?

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Ricemills
04/03/23 3:32:25 PM
#34:


ToteAll posted...
It doesn't say that though.

Is it really that wild that an unhinge transphobe like JK Rowling actually meant "shit their pants"? She's unwell.

Yes, it is wild.
And it says a lot about your preferred fantasies.

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Foppe
04/04/23 1:36:18 AM
#35:


Do you know how much time we spend on the toilet?
Wizards dont have time with that.

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Kim_Seong-a
04/04/23 1:43:07 AM
#36:


Vanish the evidence how though. There isn't any atomization spell iirc. You have to either teleport it somewhere or...oh god...

they transfigured the poo, didn't they? All those Hogwarts feasts...it was all...transfigured poo...

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remandramdoll
04/04/23 1:43:38 AM
#37:


Step one, build school with sewers in it
Step two, keep a basilisk down there
Step three, don't use the bathrooms for over a millennium and keep crapping yourself like a boss

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Prestoff
04/04/23 11:31:08 AM
#38:


Kim_Seong-a posted...
Vanish the evidence how though. There isn't any atomization spell iirc. You have to either teleport it somewhere or...oh god...

they transfigured the poo, didn't they? All those Hogwarts feasts...it was all...transfigured poo...

Recycling... YUM!

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Mystereave
04/04/23 11:36:50 AM
#39:


Kim_Seong-a posted...
Vanish the evidence how though. There isn't any atomization spell iirc. You have to either teleport it somewhere or...oh god...

they transfigured the poo, didn't they? All those Hogwarts feasts...it was all...transfigured poo...

I know you're just being funny, but the books actually mention a couple times that you can't transfigure things into edible food. It's the reason why the Room of Requirement can't provide food in spite of its many capabilities.
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Revelation34
04/04/23 12:01:43 PM
#40:


Mystereave posted...


I know you're just being funny, but the books actually mention a couple times that you can't transfigure things into edible food. It's the reason why the Room of Requirement can't provide food in spite of its many capabilities.


Well technically shit was food at one point.

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LincolnDuncan
04/04/23 12:14:36 PM
#41:


Kim_Seong-a posted...
Vanish the evidence how though. There isn't any atomization spell iirc. You have to either teleport it somewhere or...oh god...

they transfigured the poo, didn't they? All those Hogwarts feasts...it was all...transfigured poo...


There's a Star Trek theory that the replicators use poo

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DarkBuster22904
04/04/23 12:16:50 PM
#42:


But Vanishing is a fairly advanced spell... were kids just completely dependent on going to an adult to have their shit vanished for like 15 years? Or were they just left to, yknow... fester?

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EmbraceOfDeath
04/04/23 12:20:33 PM
#43:


LincolnDuncan posted...
There's a Star Trek theory that the replicators use poo
In The Expanse they do recycle everything they can, including for food and water.

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masterpug53
04/04/23 12:51:08 PM
#44:


The only thing I can guarantee is that we are all putting way more thought into this than Rowling ever did (which is any amount greater than zero).

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LeCh0nk
04/04/23 12:53:57 PM
#45:


NGL, this sounds a lot more convenient than a toilet.

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WolfFangHowell
04/04/23 12:55:50 PM
#46:


I'm blown away by all the fucking liars saying they would rather poop in hole in a 2x4 than MAGICALLY VAPORIZE IT.
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Blightzkrieg
04/04/23 2:34:51 PM
#47:


Mystereave posted...
I know you're just being funny, but the books actually mention a couple times that you can't transfigure things into edible food. It's the reason why the Room of Requirement can't provide food in spite of its many capabilities.
One of the many weird Barry Porter rules that don't make any logical sense

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TomClark
04/04/23 2:41:41 PM
#48:


[LFAQs-redacted-quote]


https://gamefaqs.gamespot.com/a/user_image/1/6/2/AAABqgAAESsq.jpg

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TomClark
04/04/23 2:45:09 PM
#49:


LincolnDuncan posted...
There's a Star Trek theory that the replicators use poo

It's confirmed on-screen. Admiral Vance taunts Ossyra over it at one point.

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Revelation34
04/04/23 11:58:21 PM
#50:


TomClark posted...


It's confirmed on-screen. Admiral Vance taunts Ossyra over it at one point.


Is there a clip?

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