Current Events > Everytime NeonTentacles is WARNED I feel sick to my stomach >_>

(+) Yeah! (+)

I have a custom script running on my PC that I commissioned a computer science student back in college to write, where it constantly refreshes GameFAQs to check the status of NeonTentacles's account. If the script detects the status has changed to "Warned" or "Suspended", it will send a text alert / email (in case I don't have my phone) and I can immediately react.

This evening was an evening like any other. I was hanging out at my crib (street vernacular for "house") with some of my friends and we were watching Wednesday Night Football (we tape Monday Night Football and watch it on Wednesday) and drinking Mike's Hard Lemonade.

Let me tell you boys, we were are completely Hard (slang for drinking many Mike's Hard Lemonades) the entire time. I looked over at my buddy and I could see he had a Hard one right in the front of his pants! I thought that was funny because normally we put them on coasters on the table. I realized my own Mike's Hard was getting low and I said to my buddy "hey, can you toss me another Hard one?"

He informed me that we were all out and I'd have to get more Mike's Hards. I figured I could just have a swig of his and asked if I could put my mouth on his Hard one. He laughed, because we were both drunk and would normally never do this (because of germs; sharing a drink is disgusting), but eventually he gave in. I grabbed the smooth shaft of the bottle and just as I was about to put it in my mouth, my phone rang.

NeonTentacles was Warned.

I howled. I let out a howl so loud and piercing that it woke up my son. I normally make him go to bed on Wednesday nights at 5:30pm partially because I don't want him to see me getting Hard with other men (the kid doesn't need to be exposed to heavy drinking at his age) and also because he's an annoying little shit and is usually asking questions about football, as if he were a nerd or something.

Tears rolled down my cheeks. I didn't know what to do. I kept refreshing the GameFAQs page, hoping that this was some kind of mistake. Maybe some moderator was intending to remove a post praising the KKK but had accidentally clicked on the innocent NeonTentacles link. Alas, this was not the case.

By this point, my friends were all visibly upset and I noticed they were trying to leave, even though we were only part of the way through the game. "No!" I screamed at the top of my lungs. I was inconsolable. I began thrashing about, throwing my collection of decorative throwing knives all over the crib (apartment). One knife struck my Native American friend, Big Bear Jim, in the neck. Blood gashed from his open wound, staining the carpet a deep red and splashing the walls. Blood was everywhere. A sickly iron scent loomed in the air as Death claimed Big Bear Jim.

My son knew he needed to act quick. He reached into his pocket and pulled out a small crucifix. "Dad!" He yelled. "Remember how Christ died for your sins? Well, NeonTentacles did the same thing. He will live in our hearts forever, and hopefully in 48-72 hours he will rise again from the depths of suspension and post wonderful stories about titties on CE again."

At that moment, I knew my son was right. My rage quelled. I tossed Big Bear Jim's corpse into the dumpster and put my son into the Punishment Closet, as he had broken one of my most important rules of the house (never make eye contact with me).

Anyway, I really just miss NeonTentacles and I think the mods should reconsider his Warning.

tl;dr - free NeonTentacles

It was for hornyposting in that topic about AOC wanting a bidet. You can probably fill in the blanks >_>

https://gamefaqs.gamespot.com/community/NeonTentacles

The mods apparently draw a line at scat/golden showers.

That's fine. Was getting on my nerves today anyhow

DKBananaSlamma posted...

It was for hornyposting in that topic about AOC wanting a bidet. You can probably fill in the blanks >_>

I'm just happy for you that it wasn't over a minor this time.

Maybe don't claim to want to occupy the position of a shit-cleaning water squirter in a lady's home. :l

everytime Neon is warned, me and my boys are like:

https://streamable.com/x4fa3w

but for real, I just wanted an excuse to post the link and mean no hate

damn. poor neontentacles.

Why couldn't it be me

DKBananaSlamma posted...

It was for hornyposting in that topic about AOC wanting a bidet. You can probably fill in the blanks >_>

https://gamefaqs.gamespot.com/community/NeonTentacles

Why did only your horny post get deleted?

DKBananaSlamma posted...

It was for hornyposting in that topic about AOC wanting a bidet. You can probably fill in the blanks >_>

https://gamefaqs.gamespot.com/community/NeonTentacles

You said you wanted her to shit in your mouth.

stop hornyposting

Was that really moddable? What was the reason, offensive?

NeonTentacles in the Punishment Closet rn

It was a real shit post tbh

Blue_Inigo posted...

It was a real shit post tbh

ha!

Still getting angry over women wearing less revealing uniforms...

Mods don't like the idea females use the restroom

https://gamefaqs.gamespot.com/a/user_image/9/2/5/AAb05zAAEJm1.jpg

Lmaooo

Ctrl F: blood was everywhere

Good post

BurmesePenguin posted...

You said you wanted her to shit in your mouth.

Dang

Turbam posted...

Dang

Im thinking YUCK

Nothing is as offensive as the cringey mid-2000s emoticon shit tbh.

the fact that you are allowed around vulnerable people is verging on negligence

rexcrk posted...

Nothing is as offensive as the cringey mid-2000s emoticon shit tbh.

<_< <_< <_< <_< <_< <_< <_< <_< <_< <_< <_< <_< <_< <_<
<_< <_< >_> <_< <_< <_< <_< <_< <_< >_> <_< <_< <_< <_<
<_< <_< <_< >_> <_< <_< <_< <_< <_< <_< >_> <_< <_< <_<
<_< <_< <_< <_< >_> <_< <_< <_< <_< <_< <_< >_> <_< <_<
<_< <_< <_< >_> <_< <_< <_< <_< <_< <_< >_> <_< <_< <_<
<_< <_< >_> <_< <_< <_< <_< <_< <_< >_> <_< <_< <_< <_<
<_< <_< <_< <_< <_< >_> >_> >_> <_< <_< <_< <_< <_< <_<

Free Neon!!!

RlP posted...

Was that really moddable? What was the reason, offensive?

I think he got banned for saying he works out to try to get with Asian women. Maybe he doesnt get the benefit of the doubt.

Neon always get punished for the most stupid shit.

...No pun intended.

So who is the backup Tity Meister while Neon is away? Is it Vegy? Or is Vegy an Ass Man?

[LFAQs-redacted-quote]

I can feel your rage, join me brother in an effort to wipe tittyposter off the face of the ce map. A true Elusium awaits us!

[LFAQs-redacted-quote]



Oh yeah. This copypasta

[LFAQs-redacted-quote]


You have a sister wife gimmick. I dont think you have any right to judge anyone lol

>_>

kage_53 posted...

You have a sister wife gimmick. I dont think you have any right to judge anyone lol

It's a copypasta from when someone went off on some random user for using >_>, thinking it was me

Please come back

I wish I was AOCs bidet

If only you'd get banned.

GrandConjuraton posted...

If only you'd get banned.

Wish granted: https://gamefaqs.gamespot.com/community/neonoctopus

but I thought only bad posters get banned

NordicValkyria posted...

Wish granted: https://gamefaqs.gamespot.com/community/neonoctopus

Now his alt(s) need to go. Like the one he posted the topic with.

All things will come to end eventually. But where there is a new end, a new beginning blossoms. Like a titty flopping out a bra, akin to a flower blooming in a field >_>

Let it forever be known that Neon got banned for talking about his desire to eat other peoples excrements.

Not just other people's! AOC's. Give me some credit here >_>