Current Events > Drifted out of contact with a girl near the end of June. Weird to text back now?

(+) Yeah! (+)

Matched with a girl on Tinder back in May, texted with her a few weeks and met up.

She apparently enjoyed the meet up apparently and said she'd like to do it again sometime.

We kept chatting a bit afterwards. Asked if she wanted to do something. She said she still did but would be busy with PHD stuff. I said no problem.

We chatted a bit on and off for a bit after but I also got super busy with life so I kinda drifted.

Haven't spoken since the end of June.

Too weird to reach back out and say hey now? Been too long? Should I leave it be?

Sounds like both of you were interested in each other so yes, I would. A month isn't that long anyway.

Super_Slash posted...

A month

*two months

But yes I guess I could just say hey

[LFAQs-redacted-quote]

Eh never gave this one a chance is my thinking

don't let life get in the way of romance!

Make her some soup.

Maybe it would be okay to say hello and see how it goes? Seems like you probably chatted enough to at least text her in a conversational way. If it goes anywhere from there would probably be after you got chatting again for a bit.

You could give it a shot. She might ignore you or ask "who's this?" I was talking to a really hot Tinder girl months ago, but she replied more sporadically and eventually unmatched. I'm still disappointed.

weird or not, it comes off as desperate. it comes off as "i struck out all summer and now i'm going back to the well in hopes that you, too, didn't meet someone this summer. I didn't care about you enough to make an effort before, but i'm lazy and horny and you're my best option"

i mean, hey, some people do get roped in by that. But it does come off as desperate either way.

Doom_Art posted...

We kept chatting a bit afterwards. Asked if she wanted to do something. She said she still did but would be busy with PHD stuff. I said no problem.

May not be your case, but for a lot of people, men and women, the "i would love to BUT i'm busy with my work/my phd/ my summer/my whatever" is 100% bullshit. it's an excuse to avoid. if someone is interested, they make time for whatever or whomever they are interested in. Like jeffhardyboys said, find a new one. I think maybe you missed the signals back in May and hung on the the thought that "maybe later!".

Naysaspace posted...

May not be your case, but for a lot of people, men and women, the "i would love to BUT i'm busy with my work/my phd/ my summer/my whatever" is 100% bullshit. it's an excuse to avoid. if someone is interested, they make time for whatever or whomever they are interested in. Like jeffhardyboys said, find a new one. I think maybe you missed the signals back in May and hung on the the thought that "maybe later!".

This. I would suggest doing it since the risk is pretty low on this.

If she ghosts you, you just move one
If she says she's still busy with her PDH stuff, you just move on
If none of those happen you just get back in touch.

There is very little to lose so yeah, do it

Yeah it's not like I've sunk a lot into this, more of a bit of a "it might've been fun if..."

Worst case scenario she ghosts and my life continues on as normal, or best case scenario things reignite. In a no lose situation

Pepys_Monster posted...

You could give it a shot. She might ignore you or ask "who's this?" I was talking to a really hot Tinder girl months ago, but she replied more sporadically and eventually unmatched. I'm still disappointed.

damn dude let it go

I'd say it depends. Like yeah you don't want to give off "I'm desperate and you're a fallback option" vibes. But if you were interested in each other and circumstances really did get in the way, then it might be worthwhile. I was messaging a girl once and our schedules kept conflicting so we never went out. Then I went on vacation and was distracted with other stuff for maybe two months. Messaged her again when I finally had free time, and we banged right away. Stayed as fuck buddies for another few months after that.