Current Events > Sooooo we went out the other day.

(+) Yeah! (+)

honestly, it's better than nothing

honestly, it's better than nothing

Disagree

Can you please define what this relationship is, what you want it to be, and if she is or will ever be on the same page?

This is just sounds like heartbreak waiting to happen. Again.

She wants to figure everything out for herself. She has no idea what she wants in life right now and she wants the space to be able to make those decisions and mistakes on her own without being held back.

and I want her to be a able to do that, my support sometimes comes off as Im trying to control her or influence her decisions but a lot of that is in the differences in the way we communicate.

Other than that where just figuring out where that takes us in the future.

But I don't understand why sex or any level of intimacy can't be involved. I have known women in that situation, and even if they don't have their life figured out, then will still want a certain level of intimacy or sexuality from someone they are seeing on a regular basis unless they simply aren't interested like that.

There is no problem with just being friends with a woman. I have female friends, and that doesn't change whether I am in a relationship or single. But it seems you would want more and I fear she does not.

Its definitely intimacy there, not as much as Id like (Sex obviously) but we do make out among other things.

But in general she just doesnt see herself being that intimate with anyone right now, Im not sure If thats cause of her growth or cause of the last relationship she had.

We didnt really talk about intimacy directly, Ill probably bring that up next week.

if she was into you, at this point, you'd know it.

honestly, it's better than nothing

Oh, I didn't know that. I was under the impression it was 100% chaste.

Can I ask why you are so hung up on her specifically? You do seem to be on somewhat different wavelengths, at least for now. You mentioned in the past that you were capable of dating other women, and I think even referenced a one-night stand or two earlier in the year. So it seems like you have prospects, but yet she commends your attention.

no hate, but from what I've read, it kinda seems like she keeps you on a line, like, she's not into you the way you're into her, but she keeps you messing with you since she's maybe not looking for anyone else right now and uses you as a potential barrier for anyone approaching her and/or she gets the kinda attention she needs while she looks elsewhere/waits for something else.

maybe I'm wrong, and the two of you have a real unique situation going on, but from my experience, if she was into you, at this point, you'd know it.

no hate to her, but I feel like you should cut ties (at least, for a good while) so that you can avoid any other potential heartbreak.

oh I mean your not very far off intimacy is lacking, is not just 0 like people think it is

even then we dont kiss often, and she genuinely weird about holding hands and most of our more intimate plans get canceled, it does honestly seem intentional.
but Im not sure if Im just perceiving it as intentional, I admittedly take things that of happened between us personal that arent really targeted towards me.

But her specifically, shes kind thats the most noteworthy thing about her but shes genuinely kind. I typically date bad bitch aesthetic if you get what Im trying to say and while shes just as attractive as them (Her body is crazy honestly) shes so kind and humble and genuinely a good person and she typically light up my day.

we were just a natural fit like interest wise we had just so much in common coming into our friendship that we instantly clicked, its extremely easy for us to talk for hours, when we met I tried to hook her up with my friend whos closer to her age and I was trying to date her friend that was closer to my age, and they just didnt work out, we where talking and she mentioned how she prefers to date men my age anyway and weve started looking at it other romantically ever since.

Yeah, this is how I read it too. He wants to eventually end up in a relationship with her, but she just likes the attention she gets from him.

Hopefully that's not actually the case though.

no hate, but from what I've read, it kinda seems like she keeps you on a line, like, she's not into you the way you're into her, but she keeps you messing with you since she's maybe not looking for anyone else right now and uses you as a potential barrier for anyone approaching her and/or she gets the kinda attention she needs while she looks elsewhere/waits for something else.

So she either isn't into you enough or she has severe intimacy issues that she isn't addressing. Either way, that does not bode well.

Man, I feel bad for you. Those are legit reasons. I have certainly had my share of "bad bitches" so to speak, but she certainly doesn't have a monopoly or being genuinely kind. I have dated a few genuinely kind women, including my current gf.

My advice, if it matters, would be to keep her as a friend, but start looking elsewhere. In time, you will either find someone else who checks all of the important boxes, or your current situation will either resolve itself, for better or worse. This is definitely a "don't put all your eggs in one basket" situation.

def whats going on here

also weird how TC keeps posting these topics apparently just to get clowned on?

i covered most of this in the last post that I was typing while you sent that, but yeah she 100% has intimacy issues, Ive been aware of that for awhile.

and yeah I would never put all my eggs in one baskets. Until we have consistent sex or a defined relationship, shes the favorite not the only.

i mean its CE I dont take 90% of you guys seriously because a lot yall are 30+ living only for jokes on the internet. So everythings pessimistic and awkward and worst case scenario with you guys.

i mainly only post as a way to vent for myself without involving people I know personally and for the 10% of people who actually have some well rounded realistic responses

i covered most of this in the last post that I was typing while you sent that, but yeah she 100% has intimacy issues, Ive been aware of that for awhile.

and yeah I would never put all my eggs in one baskets. Until we have consistent sex or a defined relationship, shes the favorite not the only.

i mean its CE I dont take 90% of you guys seriously because a lot yall are 30+ living only for jokes on the internet. So everythings pessimistic and awkward and worst case scenario with you guys.

i mainly only post as a way to vent for myself without involving people I know personally and for the 10% of people who actually have some well rounded realistic responses

The well rounded realistic responses are the ones youre ignoring as trolling

you just want people to affirm what youre doing

Its definitely intimacy there, not as much as Id like (Sex obviously) but we do make out among other things.

But in general she just doesnt see herself being that intimate with anyone right now, Im not sure If thats cause of her growth or cause of the last relationship she had.

We didnt really talk about intimacy directly, Ill probably bring that up next week.

Chad is blowing her back out any chance he gets.

Who have I ignored that wasnt trolling.

and I dont need you guys to affirm anything that Im doing, cause I havent once ask for advice. You have to remember that important fact.

Chad is blowing her back out any chance he gets

I hate comments like this. You don't know that. And what does this comment accomplish besides making you look awful?

You can give constructive criticism without comments like this.

Then you shouldn't have made this topic since you are clearly doing everything wrong and in desperate need of advice