Current Events > So I need advice..

(+) Yeah! (+)

bulletproofvita posted...

You're kind of aggressive

And you're seemingly narrow-minded on this particular topic, so I guess that makes us even?

DespondentDeity posted...

I cant believe you would use such insensitive phrasing as get off on towards an individual who has never reached climax.

r/orgasm

LOL
Deity pls

Arcanine2009 posted...

I mean she is asking you to do it. Maybe just do it really minimally.

haha, nah, make her super slender like Gal Gadot. In fact, TC should add a golden lasso and bracers.

Honestly, until I saw the side by side I didnt really have the right concept for what was really going to happen in the edit. I had also assumed that the person would be a lot closer to average in the before, and that the ask was to make them look like a fashion model or something unrealistic. I think you should just get paid for the photoshop and do the best job you can to give her what she wants.

I wish she had a way to learn how much you genuinely care for her and think that she is beautiful as she is, but I think theres just a different value at play with her mind set towards her weight and her perception of its manageability; I dont think she will interpret your gesture accurately if you refuse the photoshops, and youre currently stewardess of something utterly precious to her with her wedding photos so there is a trust relationship at stake even if you are being totally honest and forthright and taking it maximum serious, she would be hurt by your refusal and it could damage that trust.

I dont want this to be a critique of your shop skills or anything, cuz Im a moron who cant do this shit or use a computer at all, but as someone who has lost like 190 lbs I just dont even think it looks better. It still looks like a smaller version of an obese womans arm. It makes me feel sad that it will probably make her feel better to see the shopped version. I feel this curse with my weight loss tho, that all that fat is just out there, waiting for me to start craving 40 mozzarella sticks a day again and then its gonna come back! Whatever you do to the photo isnt gonna change what shes going to see in the mirror, so shes gonna have to suffer through that perceptual conflict every time she looks at one and then the other.

The thing is, you have to let her be responsible for her own behaviors, its in her power to change her weight and if getting married wasnt enough motivation then having you refuse the photoshops on her wedding photos isnt going to be either. It will just hurt her feelings and could damage your relationship even if its the right thing to do.

I think you should make her arm look fucking shredded tho, just extremely jacked more than Abby, why? Because its a possibility!

Harpie posted...

It does. I give too many shits

No, I cant change her perception but I can at least not contribute to her body image issues. In theory. But I am still contributing by not doing something that would make her feel better about her photos >.>

Yeah. You can't win every battle. That's why so much is just neutral for me. I didn't create the world, Im just living in it. I'll help pretty much every time when it's not messing with my own necessities. But, Im numb to feeling guilt for trying to find peace for myself in a world fighting against it at every turn. I'm done taking that on. Nothing around me changes except that I no longer feel a weight from it

Update: I ended up photoshopping the brides photos and sending them to her. I dont feel good about it but its something I already said Id do. Also, shes grown enough to decide what she wants to do. She loved the photos and told me they make her feel a lot better

Im definitely not doing this again, though. I will make my editing policies clear upfront and stick to them

Thank you to everyone who gave advice and thoughts! It helped me a lot

Of course you should honor her request, if she does or doesn't diet in the future so be it but these are photos she and her loved ones are going to look at for decades to come.

I didnt read every post, but why are acne and yellow teeth considered non permanent, but body weight is?

MICHALECOLE posted...

I didnt read every post, but why are acne and yellow teeth considered non permanent, but body weight is?

Well I mean it in the sense that it can go away in two weeks. A blemish lasts about a week and white strips work fast. Theyre also just easy to fix. Body weight edits arent either of these.

I also dont have ethical issues with removing acne or yellow teeth so

The brides wedding the brides request

is she paying for it?

Harpie posted...

Well I mean it in the sense that it can go away in two weeks. A blemish lasts about a week and white strips work fast. Theyre also just easy to fix. Body weight edits arent either of these.

I also dont have ethical issues with removing acne or yellow teeth so

Whats the difference? Just the amount of time it takes to get rid of them? Whitening teeth takes just as much time as losing body fat if you really work at it

I guess I just dont see the difference

you are a storyteller after my own heart lol

Do it, just charge extra.