Board 8 > Anagram Ranks 145 Waifus: The Top 22

Topic List
Page List: 1, 2, 3
Mac Arrowny
05/04/21 5:15:34 PM
#51:


LeonhartFour posted...


No, they didn't. Barret would never think of himself that way.

Eh, you can be a terrorist in a good way.
---
All the stars in the sky are waiting for you.
... Copied to Clipboard!
LeonhartFour
05/04/21 5:16:35 PM
#52:


But Barret doesn't think of himself as a terrorist at all. He thinks of Avalanche as the heroes and Shinra as the villains, full stop. It takes Cait Sith calling him out on it late in disc 2 for him to admit bombing the reactors was wrong, and even then, he can barely bring himself to do it.

---
... Copied to Clipboard!
azuarc
05/04/21 9:31:24 PM
#53:


I definitely remember the word terrorists being used to describe Avalanche. And I'm pretty sure that came from the members rather than Shinra's declarations. Regardless of semantics, though, Tifa being involved in a group staging urban guerilla warfare tactics can't work out in her favor.

---
Only the exceptions can be exceptional.
... Copied to Clipboard!
LeonhartFour
05/04/21 9:37:47 PM
#54:


Nah, it's never used by Avalanche in the game because, again, Barret sees himself as the hero. Even if the other members thought of themselves that way, they'd never say so aloud. It's pretty much exclusively used by nameless NPCs in Midgar.

---
... Copied to Clipboard!
Anagram
05/05/21 1:54:26 PM
#56:


I think I've spoiler barred all of the Danganronpa V3 spoilers in this writeup, but it might be possible to infer something based on what I didn't spoiler bar. I don't think so, but proceed at your own risk.

20. Miu Iruma

Series: Danganronpa
Nominator: MrSmartGuy (1/4 remaining)
Personal Familiarity: Yes
Attractiveness: 96 (2/145)
Personality: 28 (141/145)
Girlfriendness: 98 (3/145)
Overall Waifu Score: 74
Hair: Blonde (6/27 remaining)
Eyes: Blue (5/45 remaining)
Race: Asian (10/58 remaining)
Age: 15-19 (13/62 remaining)
Medium: Video Game (18/85 remaining)

Miu is, and I mean this in the most respectful of ways possible, easily the biggest beneficiary of the rating system I devised. I could not believe how highly she placed. I still cannot believe that Miu snuck her way into the top twenty. All of the other top twenty waifus, I more-or-less expected to be around this high. Maybe not top twenty, but at least top thirty or forty. Miu would not be anywhere near this spot if I had just directly assigned ranks to waifus.

I have to believe that Miu was scientifically designed to be the perfect waifu in every way except personality. Like, someone said what if we make a waifu for this game who looks gorgeous, and has the best and most interesting skills ever, and talks about how much she wants a boyfriend and describes all of the awesome things she can build, but who is just the most unpleasant person to ever live? Miu is a funny character and all, and she makes the game better by her presence, but I would be able to tolerate her for about two minutes before I simply had to leave the room. Ive done that before, where someone just annoyed me into just ****ing off, and Miu would speedrunning that challenge like no one else.

Her personality goes beyond mere obnoxiousness and enters the realm of I could not ever be in public with this woman, even before you consider that shes wearing borderline-BDSM gear. Shes got basically three modes, which are insulting others for literally no reason, making the worst sex jokes ever, and publicly orgasming when people insult her back. This series gets weird with sex stuff a lot of the time, but Mius probably where its at its weirdest. I might honestly have been too kind with a 28 in personality, thats at least partly the result of her being the liveliest character in the game. Like, just so were clear, in the first five seconds you meet her, she calls the main characters things I cant post on GameFAQs, and she does it for no reason. Then she spends the rest of the game mocking other girls for having smaller boobs than her and being just the absolute most unbearable person on the face of the Earth. Like, when I started this list, I figured I would post an image for each Danganronpa waifu of them saying or doing something interesting from their game, because those are easy to get hold of, and every single one for Miu is not ToS-safe.

Mius ridiculously high Girlfriendness is, of course, a result of her being the Ultimate Inventor, which means that shes just the best in the world at kind of technical device or computer, and she can build basically anything, including nonsense things. Which is one of the strongest waifu powers you could possibly have. Everyone loves technology and science-oriented waifus, they're the best. Like, again, in the first five seconds you meet her, shes throwing out uncalled-for insults, but also establishing how she invented stuff that lets you eat, read, and type while you sleep, just because she thought you waste too much time unconscious. She invented million dollar-idea contact lenses on a whim. She fixes a broken supercomputer in a day, builds EMP grenades in her spare time, and just builds whatever comes to mind in a second because she's just that good. Whatever you can describe, she can build. Miu finds the worlds most advanced android and is upgrading him days later I can only imagine that with her as your waifu, youll never have to pay for a repairman for any object for the rest of your life. Your car will break, and the next day it'll be an invincible hovercar.

The problem, of course, is how she uses these abilities. Everything she builds on her own time has some kind of weird sexual element. Like, her grand plan to let a boy know she likes him is to build a machine that teleports her panties into his hands against his will, which is hilarious but also I would not be able to deal with this girl for very long. Id be able to tolerate her for about the length it takes me to write this paragraph. Maybe if shes asleep, Id be able to stand being in the same room as her, but only until she wakes up. And this isnt even the weirdest thing she builds, I could go on. Why would you build a machine that punches people for making dirty jokes if the only person you know who makes dirty jokes is yourself? Because she gets off on abuse is why. That's not even me making a joke, that's the canon reason.

And just to be super-clear, Miu is not a case of a character being cruel and mean on the outside but secretly insecure or gentle on the inside. You get two separate modes to see characters internal thoughts or secret desires, and Mius secret fantasy is to make a baby with someone in order to force him to stay with her or to wonder if someone will think her inventions are insane, which she knows they will because her inventions are always insane. She has no cute moments where she really connects with you or does something adorable because shes just nonstop the worst person youve ever met. Shes the only time Ive ever seen a story with a super-hot girl, super-smart girl whos a friendless pariah in high school, and actually believed it.

So, what it comes down to with Miu is: perfect in every way except personality, but that personality is designed to be the most unappealing, horrible thing possible. If shed had even a completely normal, boring girl personality, shed be in the top five (I checked my Excel sheet to be sure). It makes her an interesting waifu to analyze, and thanks to the flaws in my ranking system, she climbed higher than she really should have. So, yeah: more interesting to talk about than quality as an actual waifu is how Im going to describe Miu.

---
Not changing this sig until I decide to change this sig.
Started: July 6, 2005
... Copied to Clipboard!
Anagram
05/05/21 1:55:43 PM
#57:


Next Up: A waifu I associate with bushes because of a stupid joke I made on AIM when her game first came out, but whom you would be hard-pressed to figure out the bush connection without the context of that joke, but it is actually possible if you have a really good memory of her game

---
Not changing this sig until I decide to change this sig.
Started: July 6, 2005
... Copied to Clipboard!
_stingers_
05/05/21 1:59:31 PM
#58:


Claire ez

---
Congrats Black Turtle!
... Copied to Clipboard!
Inviso
05/05/21 2:03:25 PM
#59:


XD Top 3 looks/girlfriend, Bottom 4 personality

Yup, that's Miu alright.

---
Touch fuzzy. Get fuzzier.
Inviso
... Copied to Clipboard!
colliding
05/05/21 9:06:23 PM
#60:


I need my waifus a little crazy. Miu is top ten for me

---
while you slept, the world changed
... Copied to Clipboard!
MrSmartGuy
05/05/21 9:12:28 PM
#61:


I have 2/4 left thank you very much.


---
Xbox GT/PSN name/Nintendo ID: TatteredUniform
http://www.scuffletown.org/wp-content/uploads/2010/05/tRBE1.gif
... Copied to Clipboard!
LeonhartFour
05/09/21 4:13:10 PM
#62:


... Copied to Clipboard!
Anagram
05/09/21 8:45:49 PM
#63:


Re8's been distracting me lol

---
Not changing this sig until I decide to change this sig.
Started: July 6, 2005
... Copied to Clipboard!
Not_an_Owl
05/09/21 9:09:48 PM
#64:


Anagram posted...
Re8's been distracting me lol
Where would Lady D rank on this list?

---
Besides, marijuana is far more harmful than steroids. - BlitzBomb
I headbang to Bruckner.
... Copied to Clipboard!
Anagram
05/09/21 9:46:44 PM
#65:


Not_an_Owl posted...
Where would Lady D rank on this list?
Very low girlfriendness because she's a man-murdering insane scientist vampire, very low personality because she's horribly evil, and I'm not quite sure about looks. I'm not sure how to factor in being 9 feet tall, but it means I'd need to buy a new car to fit her in it, so screw it. She would be okay for a mid-40s woman, but she's twisted by monsterism to look spookier. Either way, she's in the bottom 20 for sure.

---
Not changing this sig until I decide to change this sig.
Started: July 6, 2005
... Copied to Clipboard!
Anagram
05/10/21 5:01:59 PM
#66:


19. Lucina

Series: Fire Emblem
Nominator: Great_Paul (0/4 remaining)
Personal Familiarity: Yes
Attractiveness: 79 (29/145 tie)
Personality: 69 (35/145 tie)
Girlfriendness: 80 (13/145 tie)
Overall Waifu Score: 76
Hair: Blue (2/7 remaining)
Eyes: Blue (4/45 remaining)
Race: White (6/61 remaining)
Age: 15-19 (12/62 remaining)
Medium: Video Game (17/85 remaining)

So, when the game first came out, and Lucina saves Chrom in it, she does it by showing up and telling him that shes about to save his life, and then an assassin jumps out of a bush and she cuts him down. But given the context we have of her life, where she grew up in an apocalyptic future after her parents were dead and came back in time to save everyone, theres no possible way shed know which random bush an assassin would hide behind to kill her father. Thats why I associate her with bushes.

Its strange how Fire Emblem is now known for its waifus, but we only got three FE waifus in this list. One of them was Shamir, whos a complete no-name compared to Lyn and Lycina. Lucina, and not Tharja? Because boy oh boy, would I have had things to say about Tharja. But since weve got Lucina, lets talk about her.

Lucinas kind, brave, and all of that, and shes a little goofy. Anime stuff generally knows to give its regal characters just a little bit of goofiness to keep them relatable, which is a good move. Mainly, Lucinas goofiness manifests in her being terrible at jokes and trying to be serious even when its not really necessary. Most importantly, shes got a good moment halfway through the game. Shes like Sorry dude, it turns out that youre the vessel for an evil god or whatever, its not very well explained even in the game, but killing you will save the world from the Terminator future, so Im gonna do it. Normally, you either refuse to let her kill you and she backs off, or Chrom shows up and stops her from killing you. But! Theres a special version of the scene where if shes your waifu, shell be like Nah okay I wont kill you after all. So, what we know from this that Lucina wont murder her boyfriend, which is definitely a positive.

And as for Girlfiendness, yeah, Lucina proves herself time and again really devoted to her causes and her family. I guess she doesnt really have much in the way of marketable skills, but shes also a princess, so she wins points there. Even better, shes also not really an adventurer. She only goes on an adventure to save her fathers life (understandable) and stop the world from being blown up (extra understandable).

Is Lucina the most undeserving Smash character after Dark Pit? Im struggling to think of anyone else who got in so clearly just because they can easily be closed off of someone else. At the very least, she has the worst announcement pun (Lucina wakes her blade?!). Daisy is the only other contender, but even shes at least got a little more of a history to her. By the way, pulling up Lucina on Google reminded me of the existence of Fire Emblem Heroes, where I learned about Resplendent Hero Lucina, her twelve-year-old child form you can play as. Because of course theres a twelve-year-old child version of Lucina available in that game. Anything is real if Nowi is real.

Theres honestly not that much else to say about Lucina. Shes just a really good waifu who was clearly designed from the ground-up to be the face of her game which is odd, because shes sort of not the face of her game? Im not clear on if Nintendo intended for her to get as popular as she did.


---
Not changing this sig until I decide to change this sig.
Started: July 6, 2005
... Copied to Clipboard!
Anagram
05/10/21 5:02:02 PM
#67:


Next Up: A waifu who was in a game that was supposed to have a sequel, but it got cancelled because the first game was terrible

---
Not changing this sig until I decide to change this sig.
Started: July 6, 2005
... Copied to Clipboard!
Mac Arrowny
05/10/21 5:06:11 PM
#68:


Anagram posted...
which is odd, because shes sort of not the face of her game?


???
---
All the stars in the sky are waiting for you.
... Copied to Clipboard!
Anagram
05/10/21 5:16:46 PM
#69:


Mac Arrowny posted...
???
I mean, isn't Robin? And to an extent, Chrom is also there.

---
Not changing this sig until I decide to change this sig.
Started: July 6, 2005
... Copied to Clipboard!
colliding
05/10/21 5:19:21 PM
#70:


as a big Tharja fan myself, I wouldn't mind some truncated thoughts on my abusive waifu

---
while you slept, the world changed
... Copied to Clipboard!
xp1337
05/10/21 5:20:25 PM
#71:


Anagram posted...
Because boy oh boy, would I have had things to say about Tharja.
hopefully unkind things

---
xp1337: Don't you wish there was a spell-checker that told you when you a word out?
... Copied to Clipboard!
Sheep007
05/10/21 5:34:42 PM
#72:


I have absolutely no idea why, but I find Lucina's design very attractive. I really dislike the looks of so many other generic anime waifus, so I don't know what it is. Maybe it's just because she's a lady Marth.

---
Perhaps the golden rock was inside us all along.
... Copied to Clipboard!
azuarc
05/11/21 1:14:32 AM
#73:


Anagram posted...
Next Up: A waifu who was in a game that was supposed to have a sequel, but it got cancelled because the first game was terrible

BotW Zelda, obv.

---
Only the exceptions can be exceptional.
... Copied to Clipboard!
Raka_Putra
05/11/21 3:01:57 AM
#74:


Someone from Crazy Taxi.

---
Into the woods, but mind the past...
Into the woods, but mind the future!
... Copied to Clipboard!
colliding
05/11/21 7:58:49 AM
#75:


Kid Icarus Uprising is not terrible. Once you get the hang of the controls, they're actually pretty responsive. That being said, of course the game would be better if it just had normal camera controls.

---
while you slept, the world changed
... Copied to Clipboard!
Leonhart4
05/11/21 10:06:51 AM
#76:


I tried to like Uprising, but the control layout was just so uncomfortable with the way you had to hold the 3DS.

---
... Copied to Clipboard!
Anagram
05/11/21 12:53:21 PM
#77:


Uprising's great. I wish they'd made a sequel. The controls are the weakest part of the game, though, that is for sure.

---
Not changing this sig until I decide to change this sig.
Started: July 6, 2005
... Copied to Clipboard!
Mewtwo59
05/11/21 2:22:23 PM
#78:


The reason Uprising doesn't have a sequel is because Sakurai made it and his life has been nothing but Smash Bros since then.

As for the hint, I'm thinking you're getting pretty spoilerific with it and the answer is Kaede.

---
""Love" is making a shot to the knees of a target 120 kilometers away using an Aratech sniper rifle with a tri-light scope." HK-47
... Copied to Clipboard!
Anagram
05/11/21 3:26:04 PM
#79:


18. Christie Monteiro

Series: Tekken
Nominator: NBIceman (0/4 remaining)
Personal Familiarity: Yes
Attractiveness: 97 (1/145)
Personality: 75 (18/145 tie)
Girlfriendness: 56 (84/145 tie)
Overall Waifu Score: 76
Hair: Brown (5/22 remaining)
Eyes: Brown (2/27 remaining)
Race: Latino (0/3 remaining)
Age: 20-29 (5/59 remaining)
Medium: Video Game (16/85 remaining)

I dont really think about Tekken lore that often basically, what you need to know is that my favorite character, both to play and as a character, is Paul Phoenix. Fighting game lore to me is like, eh, I know it has to be there, but does anyone actually care about the plot to Mortal Kombat? Can someone out there tell me the backstory to, say, Sean from Street Fighter without looking it up? Someone out there probably does. So, Id never really thought about Tekken waifus in detail before. If youd asked me before I made this topic, I probably would have said Nina would be the best Tekken waifu, but really thinking about it, I now realize its Christie. This was an A+ nomination of like a mid-tier waifu in terms of how much people ever think about her. By the way, the game I was referring to is Street Fighter x Tekken, which was supposed to get a sequel, Tekken x Street Fighter, before the on-disc pay-to-win multiplayer DLC debacle blew up and Capcom just cancelled it.

Im actually completely shocked that Christie made #1 in attractiveness. This was not my plan at all, but really thinking about it, I think she actually is the hottest girl on this list sometimes. Some of her official illustrated art is hideous, and some of her CG faces are hilarious, but her official renders from Tekken 5-on are all beautiful, so she wins it. Im not certain I normally like ponytails, but Christie definitely pulls it off better than she does long hair. Anyway, Christie is the most blatantly sex appeal character in the entire franchise, but it actually works really well, so I wont complain.

Im actually not that into her I dont even know what piece of clothing on her chest is called. Boob ribbons? Like, does that actually have a name? The Wiki calls it a bikini top. Regardless, I could live without it, but its fine, it doesnt take away from her. Ive gotta say, though, I absolutely refuse to believe that her boobs arent flopping out of that when shes fighting. Like, not only is Christie a professional fighter, her specific form of fighting involves dancing and flipping around everywhere. There is zero chance those tiny strips of fabric are staying on her.

This isnt related to her waifuness, but I really enjoy how Christie was designed in Tekken 4 to show off how they could finally do long, flowing hair, then in Tekken 5 they gave her a ponytail because the long hair was too much of a hassle. It reminds me of that section in MGS1, where the Playstation version you can walk through a slowly-rising metal shutter once its high enough, but in the Gamecube version, they couldnt figure out how to program that in, so Snake just walks through it in a cutscene.

Shes also a huge pain in the ass to fight. Christie and Eddy exist for exactly one purpose, which is letting incompetent players button mash and have a chance at winning. I hope actual capoeira practitioners know how much I hate their video game incarnations.

Christies also just a really good person. Like, a friend to children, always helpful, never breaks down, doesnt actually like fighting type of person. I may have overranked her Personality a little, but its honestly fine, it doesnt change a lot. Christie is clearly the Tekken girl with the best personality and whos going to be the most capable of having a normal relationship, which is odd to say, but Im pretty sure its true.

If Christie does have a problem, though, its with her Girlfriendness. I dont really mind that she goes to silly fighting tournaments once a year, thats fine, its not a big deal. Heres the problem: I searched everywhere, and I could not find what the hell this girl does for a living. The best I could find was Occupation: Capoeira Student. Christie, you cant get a degree in dancing-fighting. And even if you could, youre not a student once youre the best dance-fighter on Earth. Thats like Albert Einstein calling himself a Physics Student when hes 60. I have no idea what you can even do with this skillset aside from opening a strip mall dojo. What does your girlfriend do for a living? Oh, she teaches eight-year-olds to kick your jaw while pretending to dance.

That aside, I still think Christie is a quality waifu. Shes not in adventurer territory, which is definitely to her benefit, but shes still worldly and fun. Honestly, I think shed be a 10/10 waifu if you could negotiate her into wearing a shirt.

---
Not changing this sig until I decide to change this sig.
Started: July 6, 2005
... Copied to Clipboard!
Anagram
05/11/21 3:26:27 PM
#80:


Next Up: A waifu whose job probably involves traveling a lot

---
Not changing this sig until I decide to change this sig.
Started: July 6, 2005
... Copied to Clipboard!
NBIceman
05/11/21 3:34:52 PM
#81:


I'm satisfied getting the #1 attractiveness nom.

---
https://imgur.com/UYamul2
Spurs - Yankees - Eagles - Golden Knights - Longhorns
... Copied to Clipboard!
TheArkOfTurus
05/11/21 3:36:55 PM
#82:


Anagram posted...
By the way, the game I was referring to is Street Fighter x Tekken, which was supposed to get a sequel, Tekken x Street Fighter, before the on-disc pay-to-win multiplayer DLC debacle blew up and Capcom just cancelled it.

Tekken x Street Fighter wasn't supposed to be a sequel, and was going to be made by Namco, not Capcom.

---
Our eyes were removed
For our own safety
... Copied to Clipboard!
Leonhart4
05/11/21 4:52:08 PM
#83:


Yeah, Tekken x SF wasn't meant to be a sequel. It was just meant to be the same crossover with a different fighting style since Namco was supposed to make it (hence why Tekken got top billing).

---
... Copied to Clipboard!
Anagram
05/11/21 5:21:52 PM
#84:


NBIceman posted...
I'm satisfied getting the #1 attractiveness nom.
She really deserved it!

TheArkOfTurus posted...
Tekken x Street Fighter wasn't supposed to be a sequel, and was going to be made by Namco, not Capcom.

Leonhart4 posted...
Yeah, Tekken x SF wasn't meant to be a sequel. It was just meant to be the same crossover with a different fighting style since Namco was supposed to make it (hence why Tekken got top billing).
Oh, I didn't know this. My mistake!

---
Not changing this sig until I decide to change this sig.
Started: July 6, 2005
... Copied to Clipboard!
Mewtwo59
05/11/21 6:15:05 PM
#85:


Oh, I wrote Christie off because that Nina Williams spinoff was the first thing I thought of when I thought of "bad Tekken game", and I didn't think Christie showed up in that.

---
""Love" is making a shot to the knees of a target 120 kilometers away using an Aratech sniper rifle with a tri-light scope." HK-47
... Copied to Clipboard!
colliding
05/11/21 8:55:31 PM
#86:


Mewtwo59 posted...
The reason Uprising doesn't have a sequel is because Sakurai made it and his life has been nothing but Smash Bros since then.


set him free, nintendo. let the man rest.

---
while you slept, the world changed
... Copied to Clipboard!
Mac Arrowny
05/11/21 8:59:20 PM
#87:


Theoretically he doesn't have anything on his plate for 2022-2023 or so.
---
All the stars in the sky are waiting for you.
... Copied to Clipboard!
Uglyface2
05/11/21 9:43:59 PM
#88:


Anagram posted...
Ive gotta say, though, I absolutely refuse to believe that her boobs arent flopping out of that when shes fighting. Like, not only is Christie a professional fighter, her specific form of fighting involves dancing and flipping around everywhere. There is zero chance those tiny strips of fabric are staying on her.

Tape. Legitimately, she'd be wearing double-sided tape on her boobs to hold the top in place. That's how performers in skimpy outfits make it work.
... Copied to Clipboard!
azuarc
05/11/21 9:44:15 PM
#89:


Anagram posted...
Next Up: A waifu whose job probably involves traveling a lot

I'm gonna guess that's Kaede....er, wait. Ibuki's still in! Okay, nope, Bye, Ibuki!

---
Only the exceptions can be exceptional.
... Copied to Clipboard!
Anagram
05/14/21 12:59:48 PM
#90:


17. Ibuki Mioda

Series: Danganronpa
Nominator: MrSmartGuy (1/4 remaining)
Personal Familiarity: Yes
Attractiveness: 86 (13/145)
Personality: 83 (6/145 tie)
Girlfriendness: 60 (65/145 tie)
Overall Waifu Score: 76.3
Hair: Black (0/21 remaining)
Eyes: Pink (1/3 remaining)
Race: Asian (9/58 remaining)
Age: 15-19 (11/62 remaining)
Medium: Video Game (15/85 remaining)

Black-haired waifus dead. They didnt even get into the top 15, which is funny, since its by far the most common hair color on Earth.

The clue I was going to give for Ibuki is the waifu whos least important to her story, only to quickly scan the list and realize Tae was still around. Do you even have to encounter Tae? I dont even remember. In terms of waifu emotional or story complexity, Ibuki is pretty clearly the least developed, least important, most emotionally flat waifu remaining. Shes basically just a really excitable teenage girl who is incidentally the Ultimate Musician, and whose role in the story is just to be fun and pleasant? And she really succeeds at that.

In real life, Im not so much a fan of girls who dye their hair multiple colors. You know that one trope of Asian girls in cartoons who have a purple or blue streak in their hair? Hate it. But Ibuki makes it work, probably because of the abstraction of generically cute anime faces. And again, in real life, Im sure I would hate that three piercings to the lower-right of the lip thing she has going on. Im gonna level with you: until I checked the Wiki just now while writing this, I thought those horns on her head were some kind of stage thing, like shes just always dressed in her stage persona or something and that includes having wacky fake horns because shes just that kind of girl. According to the Wiki, though, theyre just her hair twisted into horns. Okay, Ibuki, Im willing to buy that youve mastered how to dye your hair to get those white stripes, but I demand some kind of explanation for how youre keeping them in horn shape. The base of those horns is wider than your arms! Anyway, do you think she bought a punk rock-themed schoolgirl uniform, or did she alter her existing uniform to be that way?

Sadly, Ibukis musical specialty appears to be punk music, which is maybe the worst genre of music after patriotic early-2000s country. YEAH I SAID IT. The best ten punk songs of all time are kind of listenable to, everything short of them is garbage. I hate punk music. Its just people screaming into a microphone while sort of playing the guitar. Its funny, too, because I know Danganronpa agrees with me, because theres another unrelated character whose goal is to become the Ultimate Punk Rocker only because he thinks its the easiest genre of music to get good at. Grunge music is also terrible. Even in the anime, Ibuki defeats an army of goons by playing music until they pass out from ear pain. I could spend the entire rest of this writeup complaining about genres of music I dislike and getting people angry at me.

Anyway, the important part here is that we are told that Ibuki is the best musician on Earth. Not one of the best, shes called the Ultimate Musician many times within the game, and this is the only time we hear her play:
https://youtu.be/mThA7fXkhZU?t=47
Im gonna say it: every single Mega Man robot master theme is better. Which, given my opinion of punk music, is on point. The important part here is that although I hate her music, within the universe of Danganronpa, people think its the best thing ever. She didnt become the Ultimate Musician for no reason I hope that as your waifu, she wont force you to listen to her play, but she probably will.

I was torn on how to rate Girlfriendness for the most popular musician on Earth. On the one hand, its a really cool job, on the other, she has to be constantly touring, right? Like, nonstop. That means constant travel. So, either youre apart most of the time, or you go with her, but theres no time to go explore and visit the places shes touring. Both of these options are bad, but not gamebreakingly bad, you get what I mean? Theres also the fact that I personally have precisely zero musical ability. Ive repeatedly been called tone deaf in Discord whenever Ive tried to anything music-related. Then again, Ibuki explicitly states that you dont need talent, the ability to read music, or training to play the drums. As long as you can move your arms and legs independently of each other, even a novice can play them real easy! This is the level of respect the Ultimate Musician has for drums.


---
Not changing this sig until I decide to change this sig.
Started: July 6, 2005
... Copied to Clipboard!
Anagram
05/14/21 12:59:51 PM
#91:


Ibuki is also I want to say the most backstory-less character in the Danganronpa series? Her entire backstory is just that she was once in a band with other girls, then left. Shes also really, really dumb. Not puts herself in harms way dumb, but in the context of a mystery game, shes useful precisely one time, and thats just because she has superhuman hearing and heard things you didnt (I have to believe that punk rockers are the job most likely to have hearing loss, right?). But thats basically alright, because I dont frequently encounter murders in real life, and its not like shes a doctor or anything that will require intelligence. I also honestly have no idea how to factor in how she speaks in third person half the time. It feels like that might get old if you have to deal with it all day. I should also point out that if you suggest doing push-ups, Ibuki will agree, then demand you only do three total. Thats the kind of workout regimen even I can keep up with.

But, and heres the thing, Ibuki is just really, really charismatic. Shes just so constantly cheerful and upbeat and loving that its impossible not to like her. Every time shes on screen, the energy of the scene increases and becomes way more pleasant. Even Hiyoko likes Ibuki, and Hiyoko is an awful person who hates and insults everyone. I guess in fairness to Hiyoko, shes trapped in a crazy death game with a molesting chef, a yakuza, the most annoying girl in the world, and a literal insane person, so Ill let that one slide. The point here is basically just that Ibuki is impossible not to like. Yeah, shes as dumb as a bag of rocks, but she just has an energy to her, you know? I knew in one second that she was so ****ing dead, though I didnt know how it would happen. I really enjoy how after she and Hiyoko die, everyone mourns Ibuki and is like no how could this happen, she was the best, well never get over her tragic demise, and no one cares about Hiyoko dying at all except in how it provides more evidence to catch the killer. I suppose I should be saying that Ibukis dumbness is actually kind of a big deal? Because even when her life is being threatened in a crazy murder game, she shows zero concern and is 100% confident that everything will just work out if everyone is cool and works together. I mean, shes right, but still.

Basically, what it comes down to with Ibuki is this: shes got a really cool design and lots of energy, charisma, and likeability and very little else. This is not a complex character waifu, this is a surface level girl who does everything to an A+ degree waifu (final FTE aside, where she suddenly starts talking about how to find your inner self, then laughs and says shes just kidding). That does have an appeal. I cant really imagine doing any kind of normal relationship things with Ibuki? Like, with a lot of waifus on this list, I can see going to dinner and a movie, etc. Ibukis idea of a date is to trick a boy into doing a thousand head bangs in a row as training for being on stage, until both of them pass out from awful head trauma. Just about the only normal relationship thing Ibuki seems to like is amusement parks, which, fine. I live in LA, were ****ing drowning in amusement parks. Can't go a mile without tripping over one. And hey, her profile lists her likes as walking, napping, and gaming. ****ing perfection.

I checked the Island Mode of the game, where you basically go on undeclared dates with various characters. Almost every character dances around the idea of it being a date, or is like what do you do think we should do without actually saying Im romantically attracted to you teehee~, while Ibuki just directly demands to hold your hand and bluntly states that youre together. I appreciate that, that deserves some points.

You know, let me restate this: Ibukis waifability comes down to how much of her crazy energy you can stand, and the inherent difficulties of being a rock star. Im honestly not sure how much of that I can stand, but I definitely still see her as an A-rank waifu, yes.

Finally, and this has nothing to do with her as a waifu, I should note that Ibuki has my favorite sprite in the series. Its not the one with the really long nose that people talk about, though that one is also good. Im talking about the one where she points with both fingers and the voiceover just screams POINTING! That made me laugh the first time it happened.

I wonder how long it takes to do your hair when its knee-length.

---
Not changing this sig until I decide to change this sig.
Started: July 6, 2005
... Copied to Clipboard!
hombad46
05/14/21 1:01:23 PM
#92:


Anagram posted...
Do you even have to encounter Tae?

Yes, you do. You need to get her and Iwai's stores open before you really start exploring palaces, and she examines Futaba after you clear her palace

---
"That's Engarde hairflip metal detector tier btw"
-XIII_rocks
... Copied to Clipboard!
Anagram
05/14/21 1:02:09 PM
#93:


Next Up: A waifu with extremely long hair

---
Not changing this sig until I decide to change this sig.
Started: July 6, 2005
... Copied to Clipboard!
Anagram
05/14/21 1:07:46 PM
#94:


hombad46 posted...
Yes, you do. You need to get her and Iwai's stores open before you really start exploring palaces, and she examines Futaba after you clear her palace
Man, I didn't remember that at all, thanks.

---
Not changing this sig until I decide to change this sig.
Started: July 6, 2005
... Copied to Clipboard!
azuarc
05/14/21 5:05:04 PM
#95:


After reading that write-up, I'm still confused how Ibuki hung on this long. She's 13th for attractiveness?

---
Only the exceptions can be exceptional.
... Copied to Clipboard!
LeonhartFour
05/14/21 5:06:56 PM
#96:


... Copied to Clipboard!
Anagram
05/14/21 5:21:06 PM
#97:


You're nuts, Ibuki's great.

---
Not changing this sig until I decide to change this sig.
Started: July 6, 2005
... Copied to Clipboard!
_stingers_
05/14/21 5:34:35 PM
#98:


13th is definitely pretty high. Maybe Anagram just has a thing for pink eyes?

---
Congrats Black Turtle!
... Copied to Clipboard!
Anagram
05/14/21 5:45:48 PM
#99:


~ Breaking Waifu Alert ~

Apparently, Tali's photograph was changed in the new version of Mass Effect. This probably would have affected her attractiveness rating. I guess we'll have to live with an imperfect retconned Tali ranking, now.


---
Not changing this sig until I decide to change this sig.
Started: July 6, 2005
... Copied to Clipboard!
LeonhartFour
05/14/21 5:47:49 PM
#100:


Huh, it's not a photoshopped model anymore? I'm actually kind of impressed they changed it.

---
... Copied to Clipboard!
xp1337
05/14/21 10:27:21 PM
#101:


wow mass effect 3 redemption tour

---
xp1337: Don't you wish there was a spell-checker that told you when you a word out?
... Copied to Clipboard!
Topic List
Page List: 1, 2, 3