Current Events > That awkward moment when you realise that person at work is not your friend

(+) Yeah! (+)

Or even your ally.

I've made quite a lot of friends at various workplaces so I don't think it's unusual to have work friends, but I underestimated this girl. All that friendly chat and gossiping and relating over personal things, only to realise that she'd never want to hang out outside of work hours and will rat me out if she wants to (and has).

Oh well. I'll know now not to open up further.
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I like to keep my work life and my social life separate.
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Is this the Porsche girl
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Some people are pretty shifty, on the whole though I still think its beneficial to give people the benefit of the doubt most of the time.

What did she rat you out for?
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1337toothbrush posted...

I like to keep my work life and my social life separate.

I understand this feeling and it makes a certain amount of sense, but I also loath the idea of spending 40 hours a week with a bunch of people I can't even be genuinely personable with

Two_Dee posted...

Is this the Porsche girl

Nah, that girl is annoying on a whole different level. I don't work with Porsche girl, just hang out from time to time as she pretends to look for a job.
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Look out for ambitious women in the workplace. They will throw you under the bus in an instant.
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pinky, for once, you and I are in complete agreement. You think you get on really well with someone, then it turns out they just think you're alright. But yeah, far worse when they rat you out. Really sticking the knife in.

Just out of interest, what did you do to break the rules? Was it major or minor, or what? Anyway, workers have to stick together against managers, who are obviously the real enemy (and monsters).

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I was late in the morning and a client called asking for me. Not actually a big deal but because it was reported to my director it became this unnecessary formal incident.

I hate being micro managed more than anything so it really rubbed me up the wrong way.
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I work at a restaurant with a bunch of women. They're constantly looking for reasons to complain about each other and calling the others nasty things behind their backs, but are always pleasant to their faces. It's terrible.
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i worry about giving off this vibe a lot.

i struggle to form deeper connections with people due to anxiety and trust issues and i fear that people interpret my avoidance as disinterest or even disdain for them

in school for example it was incredibly hard to get me involved in non-school interaction, as much as others tried to involve and invite me. eventually i just started to drift away from my circle but i always wondered if they thought i just didn't like them or wasn't interested in them in any way.
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pinky0926 posted...

1337toothbrush posted...

I like to keep my work life and my social life separate.

I understand this feeling and it makes a certain amount of sense, but I also loath the idea of spending 40 hours a week with a bunch of people I can't even be genuinely personable with

You can be personable, just keep it within work. That 40 hours almost single every week is more than enough time.
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Anony1125 posted...

I work at a restaurant with a bunch of women. They're constantly looking for reasons to complain about each other and calling the others nasty things behind their backs, but are always pleasant to their faces. It's terrible.

yeah people should be rude to each other instead, that's much better.

Yeah I don't want to be friends with my coworkers. Most of them are manbabies who refuse to think for themselves and I have to do it for them

Fam_Fam posted...

Anony1125 posted...

I work at a restaurant with a bunch of women. They're constantly looking for reasons to complain about each other and calling the others nasty things behind their backs, but are always pleasant to their faces. It's terrible.

yeah people should be rude to each other instead, that's much better.

Its better because you know exactly where you stand with each other
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Anony1125 posted...

I work at a restaurant with a bunch of women. They're constantly looking for reasons to complain about each other and calling the others nasty things behind their backs, but are always pleasant to their faces. It's terrible.

Having worked in environments that are predominantly male and predominantly female, it has been my experience that this behaviour was much more prevelant in the female-heavy workplace.
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Esrac posted...

Anony1125 posted...

I work at a restaurant with a bunch of women. They're constantly looking for reasons to complain about each other and calling the others nasty things behind their backs, but are always pleasant to their faces. It's terrible.

Having worked in environments that are predominantly male and predominantly female, it has been my experience that this behaviour was much more prevelant in the female-heavy workplace.

I used to work with a bunch of nurses. That break room...you walk in there and it's guaranteed that women are talking shit about someone who isn't in the room. Then when that person walks in, they all get along great and start talking about someone else not in the room.
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Yep, it sucks. Even if you never intend to hang out and are just work buddies (nice to you, chats about stuff, laugh)...then you find out from other people that they've been talking shit about you behind your back.

And it's usually the women too. I guess it's in their nature to gossip and shit talk.

EndOfDiscOne posted...

Look out for ambitious women in the workplace. They will throw you under the bus in an instant.

I've seen even the lazy ones shit talk the hard workers for being "lazy" when they slip up on something minor.
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Luckily, the last person I normally work with that pulls the same shit just left for another job. I'm happy working with a bunch of generally good people, for the most part
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All the women I work with all off sick a lot.
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EndOfDiscOne posted...

Look out for ambitious women in the workplace. They will throw you under the bus in an instant.

This they know the art of Brownnosing and Blackmail and they will use it.

nobody at work is your friend
pinky you're in marketing iirc
you should be aware that you're dealing with people who are giving a false impression 99% of the time.

You'll always get fucked over. It's the point of living for most people

I have experienced that awkward moment, at some cost.
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pinky0926 posted...

nly to realise that she'd never want to hang out outside of work hours and will rat me out if she wants to (and has)

did these 2 things come up at the same time?
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pinky0926 posted...

Or even your ally.

I've made quite a lot of friends at various workplaces so I don't think it's unusual to have work friends, but I underestimated this girl. All that friendly chat and gossiping and relating over personal things, only to realise that she'd never want to hang out outside of work hours and will rat me out if she wants to (and has).

Oh well. I'll know now not to open up further.

I literally had the same thing happen to me. Female coworker acted like a great friend to me but never wanted to associate with me outside of it and was a total bitch to me behind my back.

Believe all women.
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A good rule for the workplace: be polite, be professional, but have a plan to backstab everybody you meet
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YookaLaylee posted...

Fam_Fam posted...

Anony1125 posted...

I work at a restaurant with a bunch of women. They're constantly looking for reasons to complain about each other and calling the others nasty things behind their backs, but are always pleasant to their faces. It's terrible.

yeah people should be rude to each other instead, that's much better.

Its better because you know exactly where you stand with each other

No cause there is this thing called work ethics

DifferentialEquation posted...

A good rule for the workplace: be polite, be professional, but have a plan to backstab everybody you meet

Even a better rule : be polite, be professional, and keep your drama out of workplace