Board 8 > You are Jeff Zero; The Ressurection (CYOA)

(+) Yeah! (+)

You broke bread (well, not really. you broke into SantaRPGs house though)

You walked on water (well, not really. you tried to walk on water and then drowned though)

you died for our sins

you resisted Satan's temptation and prevented him from being freed upon the mortal realm

then, on the third day, you rose again.

you are Jeff Zero

Now what?

A) Dry myself off
B) Try to drag Whiskey Nick's corpse out of the ocean
C) Continue on to the North Pole
D) Other

--
hi, my name is saveus_Maria
http://i.imgur.com/NQOZN.jpg

D) Other (party with Mr. All Days Off and saveus_Maria)

--
http://myanimelist.net/animelist/swordz9

D) Be Mr. All Days Off

--
Mr. All Days Off
MILLIONS OF POSTS, MILLIONS OF POSTS The Primetime Posting Hours Players MILLIONS OF POSTS

What exactly is it about me, anyway

--
K | H | A | Q | Q | A | H | K
"we're about 50 years behind the rest of western society." -icon on B8

although you're unsure how you managed to come back to life, you decide to ditch Whiskey Nick's corpse and high tail it out of Canada. you've had enough of this subpar country. besides, today is the birthday of saveus_Maria and Mr All Days Off!

you trek back across the world (since, let's face it, North America is the only part of the world that matters) and arrive at a nebulous location where the birthday party of both saveus_Maria and Mr. All Days Off are being held at the same time.

now what?

A) Present the rare Tom Waits Record you got from icon as a birthday gift
B) Mingle with the guests
C) Find a computer and post on board 8
D) Other

--
hi, my name is saveus_Maria
http://i.imgur.com/NQOZN.jpg

D) Be Mr. All Days Off

--
Mr. All Days Off
MILLIONS OF POSTS, MILLIONS OF POSTS The Primetime Posting Hours Players MILLIONS OF POSTS

suddenly, a strange feeling creeps over you.

why haven't I seen a mirror since I was resurrected?

why did I feel the sudden urge to come to this place, of all places?

why is it that since I came back to life, I've had every single day off?

then you look around the party. you take a head count of the guests. wait, where did Mr. All Days Off go? suddenly, Aizen stands before you. no, wait -- behind me?!

"no, Jeff Zero. you are Mr. All Days Off"

then you realize the fundamental truth of the universe you were unable to grasp. Jeff Zero is dead.

You are Mr. All Days Off.

now what?

A) Punch Ermine
B) Make fun of Ed Bellis on Board 8
C) Tank brain surgery to the head
D) Other

--
hi, my name is saveus_Maria
http://i.imgur.com/NQOZN.jpg

B

--
K | H | A | Q | Q | A | H | K
"we're about 50 years behind the rest of western society." -icon on B8

a beard suddenly sprouts on your face.

now what?

A) Check Self
B) Check Guests
C) Check Out
D) Other

--
hi, my name is saveus_Maria
http://i.imgur.com/NQOZN.jpg

A

--
Mr. All Days Off
MILLIONS OF POSTS, MILLIONS OF POSTS The Primetime Posting Hours Players MILLIONS OF POSTS

you check yourself. you are, without a doubt, Mr. All Days Off. You are currently sporting a beard.

You look fondly back on the time you successfully stopped Jeff Zero from being revived and stopped Satan from taking over the world in the process. you also think about the time you derailed You Are Jeff Zero; The "Ress"urection (CYOA) and turned it into You Are Mr. All Days Off (CYOA)

you're currently not holding anything

your current location is saveus_Maria and Mr. All Days Off birthday party

now what?
A) eat chef boyardee
B) call Haguile over to spice up the party
C) tank brain surgery to the head
D) Other

--
hi, my name is saveus_Maria
http://i.imgur.com/NQOZN.jpg

C

--
Mr. All Days Off
MILLIONS OF POSTS, MILLIONS OF POSTS The Primetime Posting Hours Players MILLIONS OF POSTS

when you checked yourself, you also found that you had an annoying tumor. you quickly receive some 'minor' brain surgery and recover.

now what?

A) refresh board 8 home page constantly
B) Other

--
hi, my name is saveus_Maria
http://i.imgur.com/NQOZN.jpg

you hear an awful sound that resembles the dying wail of a child being tortured. thinking SantaRPG is nearby, you grab a razor and spring into action. oh wait, it was just cats fighting.

well, nothing pleases you more than animal cruelty, since you are Mr. All Days Off. you take the razor and shave one of the cats. the other one runs away before you can grab it.

a moment later, the cat returns with defender of animals everywhere, Silver Ermine.

he's an ermine with a cape and a mask.

"stop, in the name of the moon!", Silver Ermine shouts at you

now what?

A) stop in the name of the moon
B) do the opposite of what he said
C) use the razor on Ermine
D) Other

--
hi, my name is saveus_Maria
http://i.imgur.com/NQOZN.jpg

C

--
K | H | A | Q | Q | A | H | K
"we're about 50 years behind the rest of western society." -icon on B8

you try to attack Silver Ermine with your razor, but it proves to be quite tricky. he's a spry little fellow, much more difficult to catch than a cat. additionally, he has super speed. oh, it seems like he has super strength too.

you realize this when he grabs you in a judo through and flips you onto your back. you nearly cut yourself with the razor, and end up dropping it.

maybe you should have stopped in the name of the moon.

now what?

A) lay there in a daze
B) Other

--
hi, my name is saveus_Maria
http://i.imgur.com/NQOZN.jpg

B) equip the DQ1 stick

--
Mr. All Days Off
MILLIONS OF POSTS, MILLIONS OF POSTS The Primetime Posting Hours Players MILLIONS OF POSTS

and then crack this nincompoop over the skull with enough force to split Jupiter in half

--
Mr. All Days Off
MILLIONS OF POSTS, MILLIONS OF POSTS The Primetime Posting Hours Players MILLIONS OF POSTS

A

--
http://i498.photobucket.com/albums/rr345/Rakaputra/pjbasis.png
SuperNiceDog - 1, pjbasis - 0

you grit your teeth. there's no way that you would be beaten by a stupid animal. are you kidding me? this is unbelievable. after all, you're not some kind of pushover. you are the one, the only, Mr. All Days Off. and you sure as hell aren't going to take this laying down.

"Real American" suddenly starts blasting as BroAndChar's mom brings out the birthday cake.

'that's right, mom. you were always there for me, supporting me when I needed it. when I turned 38 and still didn't have a job, you continued to let me live in the basement. when I wanted a 500 dollar anime girl body pillow despite having no job, no income, no life, you were the one who bought it for me. when I was hungry, you made me hot pockets. when I got made and threw dishes at you, you'd stay the **** out of my way just the way I like. and now when I'm in such a difficult position, you'll support me by playing my entrance theme. thanks, mom, for believing in me.'

you reach out as if by instinct and grab something that was laying on the ground. oh, it's the birthday present that saveus_Maria brought. it's wrapped in some fancy paper with a red bow at the end. the object seems to be some sort of long shaft. you wonder what's inside?

you look up at the sun, wondering how long you have left to live. no, that's wrong. dying isn't an option.

the form of Silver Ermine blots out the sun.

"get three coffins ready.", you mutter under your breath, suddenly igniting your own body in flames with the hotblooded passion of 1,000 mecha pilots. the wrapping paper catches on fire, revealing the DQ 1 Stick.

you thought that you were alone, and that you were helpless, but the DQ 1 Stick was here all along. as long as you believe in the power of the DQ 1 Hero, there's nobody who can stop you.

with a wild scream you push yourself off the ground and leap into the air, meeting Ermine in the air. you swing the DQ 1 stick gracefully forward, cutting through all of the clouds in the sky. a beam of light descends from the heavens as the DQ 1 stick collides with Ermine, splitting his body into three parts.

the three parts of Ermine's body land in three separate coffins.

now what?

A) get a job get a life
B) go back to your paradise, the world of 2D
C) celebrate with the other birthday guests
D) Other

--
hi, my name is saveus_Maria
http://i.imgur.com/NQOZN.jpg

A

--
Mr. All Days Off
MILLIONS OF POSTS, MILLIONS OF POSTS The Primetime Posting Hours Players MILLIONS OF POSTS

you decide that since you killed Silver Ermine, you can do anything. you will finally get a job get a life and whatever

what kind of job will you get?

A) cashier at mcdonalds
B) CEO of Earth
C) middle school gym teacher
D) Other

--
hi, my name is saveus_Maria
http://i.imgur.com/NQOZN.jpg

D) Pro Wrestler with the "Mr. All Days Off" gimmick

--
Mr. All Days Off
MILLIONS OF POSTS, MILLIONS OF POSTS The Primetime Posting Hours Players MILLIONS OF POSTS

you've seen enough anime to know that the best possible job is a maid at a maid cafe. although you're 39 years old, male, bald, and completely socially inept, for some reason they decide to hire you. you overhear the assistant manager saying something about 'avoiding a lawsuit' as he files your application.

the next day you show up for work in a cosplay of Homura Akemi

OT Superstar Ristelle wanders into the maid cafe

'who homu here'

now what?

A) your brain explodes
B) retreat further into the darkness

--
hi, my name is saveus_Maria
http://i.imgur.com/NQOZN.jpg

B

--
Mr. All Days Off
MILLIONS OF POSTS, MILLIONS OF POSTS The Primetime Posting Hours Players MILLIONS OF POSTS

what is this pain

I can't

http://www.gamefaqs.com/boards/2000121-anime-and-manga-other-titles/62544846
http://www.gamefaqs.com/boards/2000121-anime-and-manga-other-titles/62955058
http://www.gamefaqs.com/boards/2000121-anime-and-manga-other-titles/62835484
http://www.gamefaqs.com/boards/2000121-anime-and-manga-other-titles/62783625
http://www.gamefaqs.com/boards/2000121-anime-and-manga-other-titles/62673713
http://www.gamefaqs.com/boards/2000121-anime-and-manga-other-titles/62548156


ggg

aegk

AAGGGHHHH

you feel your mind starting to crumble. some fluid is leaking out of your eyes and your nose. you manage to escape the psychic assault by retreating into the darkness.

however, you find yourself face to face with a Grue. you cannot fight in your weakened condition.

now what?

A) Fight the Grue anyway
B) Go back and face Ristelle
C) Run in a random direction
D) Call an ally for help
E) Other

--
hi, my name is saveus_Maria
http://i.imgur.com/NQOZN.jpg

D

--
Mr. All Days Off
MILLIONS OF POSTS, MILLIONS OF POSTS The Primetime Posting Hours Players MILLIONS OF POSTS

you fall to your knees. the Grue looms over your downed form, saliva dripping from its jowls as it relishes the thought of swallowing you whole. this thing is terrifying, yet without a clearly defined form. it's about 3x more deadly than a velociraptor.

if you try to run away, Ristelle will find you and finish destroying what is left of your mind

however, you've watched enough anime to know you can't do everything alone. you'll call upon one of your nakama instead.

who do you call?

A) CycloRaptor
B) meisnewbie
C) GuessMyUserName
[REDACTED]
E) Other

--
hi, my name is saveus_Maria
http://i.imgur.com/NQOZN.jpg

a chill overtakes your body. it was so warm before, but now you're, like, freezing? what is this? where did the pain go? where did time go?

of course, it's. . . "him"

11:23 - meisnewbie uses his massive brain and genius intellect to instantly rewrite the laws of space and time, winning a Nobel Peace Prize on the process

he throws the Nobel Peace Prize away, considering such an "honor" to be less than a piece of trash and below him

he shoots himself backward in time, launching himself at the Grue at speeds so ridiculous they can't be measured even with a quantum compass

the Grue splits in half, being reduced to two bloody husks, and topples away from you at either side

'where am I', you ask, unable to reason what just happened as you lay in a bloody mess of what remains of the Grue. you look up at meisnewbie

'you're home.', he says. meisnewbie pulls you up to your feet and bro hugs you

now what?

A) go take a bro shower with meisnewbie (no homu)
B) form a tag team partnership with meisnewbie and take down Ristelle
C) Other

--
hi, my name is saveus_Maria
http://i.imgur.com/NQOZN.jpg

[FALSE END]

--
hi, my name is saveus_Maria
http://i.imgur.com/NQOZN.jpg

A

--
Mr. All Days Off
MILLIONS OF POSTS, MILLIONS OF POSTS The Primetime Posting Hours Players MILLIONS OF POSTS

you decide to wash the Grue off of you with a nice, relaxing shower

of course, since you're both bros, you and newbie decide to shower together. about 15 minutes later, you feel nice and clean.

now what?

A) attack White Base
B) form a tag team partnership with meisnewbie and take down Ristelle
C) do something less dangerous (specify)

--
hi, my name is saveus_Maria
http://i.imgur.com/NQOZN.jpg

C) attack white base and betray meisnewbie

--
Mr. All Days Off
MILLIONS OF POSTS, MILLIONS OF POSTS The Primetime Posting Hours Players MILLIONS OF POSTS

you decide to attack White Base and plan to betray meisnewbie during the battle. which is a good thing, since he probably would have betrayed you if you didn't betray him first.

after he blows up, you see HGR broadcasting his famous 'seig vgmc' speech on every single television in the world in honor of "our fallen brother" garma newbie

now what?

A) face your fears
B) uh......


okay.......?
C) Other

--
hi, my name is saveus_Maria
http://i.imgur.com/NQOZN.jpg

C) Drop a colony on HGR

--
Mr. All Days Off
MILLIONS OF POSTS, MILLIONS OF POSTS The Primetime Posting Hours Players MILLIONS OF POSTS

C) Drop a HGR on colony

--
~Ç~ http://img.imgcake.com/AlecTrevylan006/fdshieldpngyn.png Eff_Dee
http://img.imgcake.com/nio/9fdpngys.png

you attempt to drop a colony on HGR but you forget that you can't breath in space until you're already in space

your body is fried with radiation from the sun and then explodes

THE END

The Primetime Posting Hours are over

you were Mr All Days Off

you have died via space

pedophiles killed: _____
countries destroyed: 0
animals abused: 2

Ristelle: STILL AT LARGE

overall, this journey was a Failure

it's too bad, isn't it?

--
hi, my name is saveus_Maria
http://i.imgur.com/NQOZN.jpg

well I thought this was a good CYOA where it was assumed everyone who went into space put a pink spacesuit ahead of time

guess I was wrong

--
Mr. All Days Off
MILLIONS OF POSTS, MILLIONS OF POSTS The Primetime Posting Hours Players MILLIONS OF POSTS

just like 2097 mockingbird all good things die as soon as you go into outer space

--
hi, my name is saveus_Maria
http://i.imgur.com/NQOZN.jpg

^What is this? I am suddenly very interested in everything about this.

--
Fennec... :3
http://fennecfox.biz/wp-content/uploads/2010/08/Fennec-Fox-Having-Fun.jpg

I guess it's a good thing it wasn't me.

--
K | H | A | Q | Q | A | H | K
"we're about 50 years behind the rest of western society." -icon on B8

I am retiring from CYOAs until I can be half as good at them as user saveus_Maria

--
http://img.imgcake.com/newaccountjpget.jpg

Cyclo you are good

But yeah

shameus_Maria

--
K | H | A | Q | Q | A | H | K
"we're about 50 years behind the rest of western society." -icon on B8