I'm sure this topic's already out there somewhere, but I'm too lazy to look for it, and I just wanted to post this.
Here's the game: Post your top ten games of all time in order, then flame about how bad one of the games is on the list above yours :)
This is supposed to be all in good fun and hopefully in the spirit of Zero Punctuation reviews by Yahtzee on "The Escapist," that is, berating an otherwise decent game for its major or minor flaws. Please don't get upset when somebody makes your favorite game sound like a piece of crap.
1. Halo CE 2. Call of Duty 4 3. Legend of Zelda: OoT 4. Portal 1/2 (sorry for cheating with two entries here) 5. StarCraft 6. Super Smash Brothers 7. Pokemon Blue 8. Star Wars: KOTOR 9: Assassin's Creed 2 10. Red Dead Redemption
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Remembering the days when you didn't have to put a "1" after Halo. Halo 1 LAN vid: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VhjWnJU2EKY
1. Metal Gear Solid 2 2. Resident Evil 4 3. Metal Gear Solid 3 4. XIII 5. Sonic 3 and Knuckles 6. Metal Gear Solid 4 7. Metal Gear Solid 8. Sonic 2 9. GTA: San Andreas 10. Tomb Raider 2
3. Legend of Zelda: OoT
This is the most boring game I have ever played in my life and no I will not need punctuation for this rant because it will be outstanding without that CRUTCH I feel that OoT would be more exciting if I didn't have to spend an hour running across Hyrule Field every time I did something worthwhile or if it wasn't just kind of lame I mean Jabu Jabu belly COME THE F*** ON WHAT A TERRIBLE DUNGEON I thought this game was meant to be the pinnacle of dungeon design or something like that
sucks
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"I wish I was French." - blindhobo13 "I don't think you know what "French" means." - As I Desire
This is the most boring game I have ever played in my life and no I will not need punctuation for this rant because it will be outstanding without that CRUTCH I feel that OoT would be more exciting if I didn't have to spend an hour running across Hyrule Field every time I did something worthwhile or if it wasn't just kind of lame I mean Jabu Jabu belly COME THE F*** ON WHAT A TERRIBLE DUNGEON I thought this game was meant to be the pinnacle of dungeon design or something like that
sucks
HEY! THAT'S NOT TRUE! OoT IS AMAZI... oh right.
Good job, lol.
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Remembering the days when you didn't have to put a "1" after Halo. Awesome Halo 1 LAN vid: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VhjWnJU2EKY
1. Shin Megami Tensei: Persona 4 2. Kirby Super Star 3. Banjo-Kazooie 4. Donkey Kong Country 2 5. Metal Gear Solid 3 6. Warcraft III 7. God Hand 8. Crash Bandicoot Warped 9. The Legend of Zelda: Majora's Mask 10. Paper Mario: The Thousand-Year Door
Metal Gear Solid
Would you truly put such a whiny and deplorable title in your favorite of all time? I suppose if you desperately hammered away at your Playstation back in the day, staying up until two in the morning trying to figure out the god-awful controls so that you could misquote an overtly-preachy and trite title in order to sound philosophical to all of your middle school friends, the morons they are. I suppose if you cut out the completely needless backtracking, the poorly-written monologues, the terrible pacing when it came to cutscenes, the stilted dialogue, the unintuitive gunplay and control set up, the clunky way that Snake crawled at only fifteen degree angles and stuffed his face into room geometry like put a metaphor for sex here because Zero Punctuation, and just removed Meryl entirely there could be a game that would be considered 'sub-par'. But it's an aged relic from an era of experimentation, and it's no longer needed and has no place in this world, so kick its blocky ass out of here. Or get a Hideo Kojima love pillow, either or.
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http://24.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_lvb2chGY8D1qm7gfoo1_500.jpg SuperNiceDog? More like SuperChillGuy. Who is better than me at brackets by a mile.
1. Super Mario 64 2. Final Fantasy 9 3. Super Mario RPG 4. Streets of Rage 2 5. Perfect Dark 6. Final Fantasy 7 7. Resident Evil 4 8. Grand Theft Auto: Vice City 9. Star Fox 64 10. Pokemon Yellow
Hi XIII. Tomb Raider 2? More like WOMB RAIDER 2! More dudes have been in Lara Croft than a professional whore. And when I say professional, I mean the one that has the best chance to survive the evening after being beaten by her pimp. At least the pimp has control over his ladies. Trying to control Lara in this game is like trying to get a drunk girl to walk across a balance beam. Enemies like wild dogs attacking you? Forget about trying to kill them! She has a hell of a time getting things that are biting at her legs. And thinking about it, that really does figure. She likes things that low on her, after all.
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"Just drown them in maple syrup. Sticky maple syrup." - Taslion
Oh hey, someone beat me to XIII. No matter. Here's one for you too, kamek.
Majora's Mask? Seriously? You have three days to finish that piece of crap but why bother? The game is so unbelievably boring, I'd gladly let the end of the world come before I take the time to beat it. Just like OoT, this game suffers from sub-par combat, a main character completely lacking in personality, and garbage level design. Link should just go ahead and poke Zelda with his Deku Stick before Armageddon arrives so he doesn't die a virgin.
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"Just drown them in maple syrup. Sticky maple syrup." - Taslion
9. The Legend of Zelda: Majora's Mask Who came up with the idea that implementing daylight savings time and the dec 21st, 2012 into a zelda game would be a good idea? Seriously, every time you have to turn back the clock it's even worse then turning back all your analog clocks back for DST. Oh hey, forgot to bank your rupees? To bad. They were stolen by the temporal mafia Also, only 4 temples? Comeon, and they didn't even do a good job on the 4 they have in the game. That fish boss? Get it out of my face. Also Fierce deity only for bosses? I want to be able to use it on everything, without the use of a glitch. Also, tatl is the most useless sidekick ever, he has no good information at all and is like "I have no idea how to beat this thing, it's up to you" at least navi helped you.
1. Zelda: OOT 2. Mass Effect 2 3. Disgaea: DS 4. Bioshock 5. Final Fantasy X 6. Pokemon Black/White 7. Half Life 2 8. Fatal Frame 2 9. Soul Calibur 2 10. Persona 4