Board 8 > GB Quick Look: Postal 3

(+) Yeah! (+)

http://www.giantbomb.com/quick-look-postal-iii/17-5478/

This may be the worst thing I've ever seen.

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"Why are you inquiring as to whether a fictional child has four penises? Pretty weird dude."
http://img.imgcake.com/1322024300571gifne.gif

The quick look or the game?

Because if a quick look is bad then 2012 really is the end of the world.

The game

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"Why are you inquiring as to whether a fictional child has four penises? Pretty weird dude."
http://img.imgcake.com/1322024300571gifne.gif

So wait, he bought the game on Gamer's Gate, launched the installer, was given a code to punch into Steam, which he did, and that ended up letting him finally install the game, except through Steam, even though the game isn't even listed on the Steam store?

The hell?

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[NO BARKLEY NO PEACE] Ace Detective in Sir Charles's Police
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kkOj5DAJu2A

In the video he says it's the Russian version of the game. It's still weird though.

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Blue Cucco / Waiting Cactus
http://img355.imageshack.us/img355/4915/cojiro2nk2.jpg http://i53.tinypic.com/14wf59z.gif

I don't even understand what it being the Russian version of the game has anything to do with any of that though. In fact he didn't even sound like he was trying to get the Russian version of the game. He was just like "The intro screen has a bunch of .ru domains, so I think this is the Russian version." That just adds to the "The hell?"

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Ace Detective in Sir Chris' Police
http://i54.tinypic.com/vcw0ax.gif

The publisher is a Russian company, Akella. (At my job) We do some work with them for distribution in Russia.

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SuperNiceDog? More like GuruNiceDog.

Seems about as quality of a game as Postal 2, but with less shock value. I mean, Postal 2 never had THAT much shock value in the past, but today even soccer moms are desensitized to "fart guns" and pissing on hookers.

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_foolmo_
'and out of the blue and completely unprovoked came foolmo and his insult' - Anagram

Wow. This is...way worse than I expected.

Well it's officially on Steam now I guess- http://store.steampowered.com/app/10220/

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Blue Cucco / Waiting Cactus
http://img355.imageshack.us/img355/4915/cojiro2nk2.jpg http://i53.tinypic.com/14wf59z.gif

From: The Yoshimaster007 | #011
Well it's officially on Steam now I guess- http://store.steampowered.com/app/10220/

Well yeah, it's on Steam, but far as I can tell, it's not available for purchase. They've got a few games like that, but usually they're games that were available for purchase at one time, not games that are only available for purchase on a competing site, where you get a code to download it on Steam.

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Ace Detective in Sir Chris' Police
http://i56.tinypic.com/2hxynir.gif

Key features:

Edgy, satirical Running With Scissors sense of humor
A world of twisted parody inspired by real people, events and philosophies
Large, detailed, interactive environments
Crazy POSTAL style Vehicle gameplay
NPC’s react to your behavior in a variety of surprising ways
Multiple story paths determined by your behavior
Celebrity characters: Super porn star Ron Jeremy, Village People Cowboy Randy Jones, Internationally hated film director Uwe Boll and Playboy Playmate Jennifer Walcott
Appearances by other popular Running With Scissors character franchises: Krotchy, Champ and the Postal Babes, who will fight along side you (or sometimes against you!)
Insane new gameplay including the Helper Monkey, Grenade Cats and the BadgerSaw
Kill Uwe Boll! (or save him!)

This is the Ultimate right here, folks.

Looks like you can't actually buy it.

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"Why are you inquiring as to whether a fictional child has four penises? Pretty weird dude."
http://img.imgcake.com/1322024300571gifne.gif

From: tereziWright | #013
Kill Uwe Boll! (or save him!)

goty

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_foolmo_
'You are obviously intelligent and insightful' - Sir Chris about me

Well it looks better than Train Simulator, anyway.

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Ace Detective in Sir Chris' Police
http://img52.imageshack.us/img52/1804/valdez.jpg

The only thing I could speculate is that Steam is holding it back so a patch is available right away but GG didn't get the memo and released it early. I mean, right from the QL you can tell it's pretty broken. Maybe a beta build? who knows. Remember what happened with Magicka when it first released? They accidentally uploaded a broken beta copy of the game and had to spend the following few days patching it up.

Also I just noticed this: Hard Disk Space: 13.5 GB
Talk about unoptimized.

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Blue Cucco / Waiting Cactus
http://img355.imageshack.us/img355/4915/cojiro2nk2.jpg http://i53.tinypic.com/14wf59z.gif

Still don't understand why buying it on GG means you still play it on Steam, though. That's just... stupid. I don't even know why GG would agree to that. I'm thinking that has to be a mistake. At the very least, I can't believe GG is aware of this.

It's almost like buying the 360 version of a game, and when you open it up, the only thing inside is a PSN download code for said game.

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Ace Detective in Sir Chris' Police
http://i52.tinypic.com/2nar4wm.jpg

No I'm....

I'm pretty sure this is just the game.

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"Why are you inquiring as to whether a fictional child has four penises? Pretty weird dude."
http://img.imgcake.com/1322024300571gifne.gif

Well after more researching it seems that for whatever reason Steam itself is just broken. Game is also probably Steam-only.
http://www.runningwithscissors.com/postal-3-steam-keys

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Blue Cucco / Waiting Cactus
http://img355.imageshack.us/img355/4915/cojiro2nk2.jpg http://i53.tinypic.com/14wf59z.gif

But it is literally available for purchase on Gamer's Gate. I just checked the page.

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Ace Detective in Sir Chris' Police
http://img845.imageshack.us/img845/1417/nighthawks1575201136223.jpg

I'm not seeing the contradiction then. Just because it's not available for purchase, doesn't mean the game is not on their servers. I remember seeing people playing Sonic Generations on steam a good week before it was out.

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Blue Cucco / Waiting Cactus
http://img355.imageshack.us/img355/4915/cojiro2nk2.jpg http://i53.tinypic.com/14wf59z.gif

No that's not my point. Gamer's Gate is a competing service to Steam. It has nothing to do with Steam other than the fact that they are business competition. I have no Earthly idea why you can buy it on Gamer's Gate if you're forced to install and run it through Steam.

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Ace Detective in Sir Chris' Police
http://i55.tinypic.com/2mcnjl.gif

Then I dunno. I've barely seen any hype for the game and the game itself looks horrible so it doesn't seem like it'll sell well anyway.

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Blue Cucco / Waiting Cactus
http://img355.imageshack.us/img355/4915/cojiro2nk2.jpg http://i53.tinypic.com/14wf59z.gif

I liked postal 2, but this looks so bad.

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Nanomachines: The cause of and solution to all of life's problems.
http://img186.imageshack.us/img186/5980/861756874pp6.jpg