Current Events > There's a button you can press that will tell you if your partner has cheated

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HairyQueen 04/19/23 8:57:51 PM #1:	Do you press the button? Yes I would press the button No I wouldn't press the button Do you press the button? - Results (53 votes) Yes I would press the button 66.04% (35 votes) 35 No I wouldn't press the button 33.96% (18 votes) 18 A wizard appears before you and presents to you a button you can press that will tell you if your partner of 20 years has cheated on you. They explain that there is an unknown probability that your partner has cheated on you any number of times in the past. They assure you that if your partner did cheat, they have come to sincerely regret it. They also will never cheat on you again, regardless of whether or not the button is pressed. You ask why the wizard chose you of all people to give this opportunity, and they explain that everyone gets a visit from the wizard after their 20-year anniversary. If you choose to press the button, you'll learn if your partner cheated on you, not how often, not who with, only that it happened at least once. You cannot discuss the wizard or the button with your partner or anyone else. The magic prevents you from communicating this information. If you choose to not press the button, the wizard assures you that your partner will be faithful from now on with certainty, and if there was any cheating in the past, it truly crushed them with guilt. The wizard will never contact you again. Do you press the button? --- "I like to smell other people's farts" -k1zzl3_82 https://i.imgur.com/BQTuf1F.jpeg <cite>HairyQueen posted [p:972952987] in There's a ... [t:80417739]...</cite> <quote> Do you press the button? Yes I would press the button No I wouldn't press the button Vote View Results Do you press the button? - Results (53 votes) Yes I would press the button 66.04% (35 votes) 35 No I wouldn't press the button 33.96% (18 votes) 18 Show Voting Form function poll_vote() { var vote_option = $("input[name='poll_vote']:checked").val(); if(!vote_option) return; $.ajax({ type: 'POST', url: '/ajax/forum_poll_vote', data: { option: vote_option, board: '400', topic: '80417739', message: '0', key: 'ab6591dc' }, success: function(response) { if(response.error) { alert(response.error); } else { $("#poll_vote").hide(); $("#poll_results").html(response.html).show(); } } }); } function view_results_legacy() { $("#poll_vote").hide(); $("#poll_results").show(); } function hide_results_legacy() { $("#poll_results").hide(); $("#poll_vote").show(); } A wizard appears before you and presents to you a button you can press that will tell you if your partner of 20 years has cheated on you. They explain that there is an unknown probability that your partner has cheated on you any number of times in the past. They assure you that if your partner did cheat, they have come to sincerely regret it. They also will never cheat on you again, regardless of whether or not the button is pressed. You ask why the wizard chose you of all people to give this opportunity, and they explain that everyone gets a visit from the wizard after their 20-year anniversary. If you choose to press the button, you'll learn if your partner cheated on you, not how often, not who with, only that it happened at least once. You cannot discuss the wizard or the button with your partner or anyone else. The magic prevents you from communicating this information. If you choose to not press the button, the wizard assures you that your partner will be faithful from now on with certainty, and if there was any cheating in the past, it truly crushed them with guilt. The wizard will never contact you again. Do you press the button? </quote> ... Copied to Clipboard!
alfred_ashford 04/19/23 9:05:26 PM #2:	Yes I would and then I would suggest an open relationship lol --- Jackie Chan is the nicest guy but everyone wants to mess with him - Pablo Francisco <cite>alfred_ashford posted [p:972953164] in There's a ... [t:80417739]...</cite> <quote>Yes I would and then I would suggest an open relationship lol</quote> ... Copied to Clipboard!
averagejoel 04/19/23 9:14:18 PM #3:	I trust her enough that I know without the button, and I hope that anyone who says differently gets out of that relationship ASAP --- http://error1355.com/ce/averagejoel.html "Athens needed Socrates and this board needs averagejoel." -Godnorgosh <cite>averagejoel posted [p:972953363] in There's a ... [t:80417739]...</cite> <quote>I trust her enough that I know without the button, and I hope that anyone who says differently gets out of that relationship ASAP</quote> ... Copied to Clipboard!
HairyQueen 04/20/23 4:04:29 PM #4:	alfred_ashford posted... Yes I would and then I would suggest an open relationship lol Interesting. You could do that anyway though --- "I like to smell other people's farts" -k1zzl3_82 https://i.imgur.com/BQTuf1F.jpeg <cite>HairyQueen posted [p:972969014] in There's a ... [t:80417739]...</cite> <quote>alfred_ashford posted... </cite><quote>Yes I would and then I would suggest an open relationship lol</quote>Interesting. You could do that anyway though</quote> ... Copied to Clipboard!
sauceje 04/20/23 4:07:14 PM #5:	I'll take the money --- He was born in a coop, raised in a cage, children fear him, critics rage, He's half alive, he's half dead, folks just call him Buckethead <cite>sauceje posted [p:972969069] in There's a ... [t:80417739]...</cite> <quote>I'll take the money</quote> ... Copied to Clipboard!
NoxObscuras 04/20/23 4:07:32 PM #6:	I have confidence that my current girlfriend wouldn't cheat. But I'd still press the button. I have zero tolerance for cheating. That "they truly regret it" part means fuck all to me. Should have thought about that before cheating. --- PSN - NoxObscuras Z490 \| i9-10900K \| EVGA 3080 FTW3 Ultra \| 32GB DDR4 3600 \| 4TB SSD <cite>NoxObscuras posted [p:972969075] in There's a ... [t:80417739]...</cite> <quote>I have confidence that my current girlfriend wouldn't cheat. But I'd still press the button. I have zero tolerance for cheating. That "they truly regret it" part means fuck all to me. Should have thought about that before cheating.</quote> ... Copied to Clipboard!
garan 04/20/23 4:27:17 PM #7:	I press the button. If yes, then the relationship is over. Cheaters are the scum of the earth. <cite>garan posted [p:972969444] in There's a ... [t:80417739]...</cite> <quote>I press the button. If yes, then the relationship is over. Cheaters are the scum of the earth.</quote> ... Copied to Clipboard!
bigblu89 04/20/23 4:37:03 PM #8:	What if you push the button, the wizard says that they did cheat, and you break up. Only to find out the wizard is one of those irrational weirdos that thinks if someone thinks a celebrity is good looking, they consider that cheating. --- It takes zero effort to be a good person. <cite>bigblu89 posted [p:972969655] in There's a ... [t:80417739]...</cite> <quote>What if you push the button, the wizard says that they did cheat, and you break up.Only to find out the wizard is one of those irrational weirdos that thinks if someone thinks a celebrity is good looking, they consider that cheating.</quote> ... Copied to Clipboard!
HairyQueen 04/20/23 4:43:45 PM #9:	bigblu89 posted... What if you push the button, the wizard says that they did cheat, and you break up. Only to find out the wizard is one of those irrational weirdos that thinks if someone thinks a celebrity is good looking, they consider that cheating. Do you think your partner would ever need to feel "sincere regret" about checking out a celebrity? And that they would've been so upset about their behavior that they'll never find a celebrity attractive again? --- "I like to smell other people's farts" -k1zzl3_82 https://i.imgur.com/BQTuf1F.jpeg <cite>HairyQueen posted [p:972969794] in There's a ... [t:80417739]...</cite> <quote>bigblu89 posted... </cite><quote>What if you push the button, the wizard says that they did cheat, and you break up.Only to find out the wizard is one of those irrational weirdos that thinks if someone thinks a celebrity is good looking, they consider that cheating.</quote>Do you think your partner would ever need to feel "sincere regret" about checking out a celebrity? And that they would've been so upset about their behavior that they'll never find a celebrity attractive again?</quote> ... Copied to Clipboard!
KeeperOfShadows 04/20/23 4:49:57 PM #10:	I'd press the button no matter how much faith I had in my partner. No real reason not to. --- Currently playing: DFFOO, Priconne <cite>KeeperOfShadows posted [p:972969918] in There's a ... [t:80417739]...</cite> <quote>I'd press the button no matter how much faith I had in my partner. No real reason not to. </quote> ... Copied to Clipboard!
HudGard 04/20/23 4:52:02 PM #11:	Ignorance is bliss. --- You haven't set a signature for the message boards yet <cite>HudGard posted [p:972969961] in There's a ... [t:80417739]...</cite> <quote>Ignorance is bliss.</quote> ... Copied to Clipboard!
divot1338 04/20/23 5:02:36 PM #12:	I shoot the wizard. --- Moustache twirling villian https://i.imgur.com/U3lt3H4.jpg- Kerbey <cite>divot1338 posted [p:972970203] in There's a ... [t:80417739]...</cite> <quote>I shoot the wizard.</quote> ... Copied to Clipboard!
bigblu89 04/20/23 5:16:42 PM #13:	HairyQueen posted... Do you think your partner would ever need to feel "sincere regret" about checking out a celebrity? And that they would've been so upset about their behavior that they'll never find a celebrity attractive again? My partner? No. But everyone has a different opinion of what's considered "cheating". Some think it's sex. Some say kissing. Some say engaging in flirtatious conversation. Some say just mere sexual thoughts of another person is cheating. So a blanket statement by the wizard of "Yes, your partner cheated on you" can mean a myriad of things. --- It takes zero effort to be a good person. <cite>bigblu89 posted [p:972970475] in There's a ... [t:80417739]...</cite> <quote>HairyQueen posted... </cite><quote>Do you think your partner would ever need to feel "sincere regret" about checking out a celebrity? And that they would've been so upset about their behavior that they'll never find a celebrity attractive again?</quote>My partner? No.But everyone has a different opinion of what's considered "cheating". Some think it's sex. Some say kissing. Some say engaging in flirtatious conversation. Some say just mere sexual thoughts of another person is cheating.So a blanket statement by the wizard of "Yes, your partner cheated on you" can mean a myriad of things.</quote> ... Copied to Clipboard!
Trumble 04/20/23 5:20:38 PM #14:	Yeah, I'd need clarification on what the wizard considers "cheating", and I'd decide from there. --- The only thing we have to fear is Trumble itself. http://error1355.com/ce/Trumble.html <cite>Trumble posted [p:972970542] in There's a ... [t:80417739]...</cite> <quote>Yeah, I'd need clarification on what the wizard considers "cheating", and I'd decide from there.</quote> ... Copied to Clipboard!
Anony1125 04/20/23 5:21:32 PM #15:	HairyQueen posted... You ask why the wizard chose you of all people to give this opportunity, and they explain that everyone gets a visit from the wizard after their 20-year anniversary. HairyQueen posted... You cannot discuss the wizard or the button with your partner or anyone else. The magic prevents you from communicating this information. So my partner has been given the choice as well, or will be soon. And they'll know that I've been given the choice too and will probably wonder whether I've taken it or not, though they won't be able to ask and I won't be able to tell. If they have cheated the guilt will come out anyway since there's a pretty good chance I now know. I guess I might as well press the button and confirm one way or the other. If she has, it will spare the awkwardness. If she hasn't, it will simply reaffirm my faith in her. Imagine you have a chance to prove you've been faithful and your partner doesn't let you because they're afraid to find out. --- Feeling really good. Faceless goofus in a sea of alts <cite>Anony1125 posted [p:972970562] in There's a ... [t:80417739]...</cite> <quote>HairyQueen posted... </cite><quote>You ask why the wizard chose you of all people to give this opportunity, and they explain that everyone gets a visit from the wizard after their 20-year anniversary.</quote>HairyQueen posted... </cite><quote>You cannot discuss the wizard or the button with your partner or anyone else. The magic prevents you from communicating this information.</quote>So my partner has been given the choice as well, or will be soon. And they'll know that I've been given the choice too and will probably wonder whether I've taken it or not, though they won't be able to ask and I won't be able to tell. If they have cheated the guilt will come out anyway since there's a pretty good chance I now know. I guess I might as well press the button and confirm one way or the other. If she has, it will spare the awkwardness. If she hasn't, it will simply reaffirm my faith in her. Imagine you have a chance to prove you've been faithful and your partner doesn't let you because they're afraid to find out.</quote> ... Copied to Clipboard!
Tyranthraxus 04/20/23 5:24:33 PM #16:	HairyQueen posted... If you choose to not press the button, the wizard assures you that your partner will be faithful from now on with certainty, and if there was any cheating in the past, it truly crushed them with guilt. The wizard will never contact you again. This makes the no option much more appealing tbh. --- It says right here in Matthew 16:4 "Jesus doth not need a giant Mecha." https://i.imgur.com/dQgC4kv.jpg <cite>Tyranthraxus posted [p:972970618] in There's a ... [t:80417739]...</cite> <quote>HairyQueen posted... </cite><quote>If you choose to not press the button, the wizard assures you that your partner will be faithful from now on with certainty, and if there was any cheating in the past, it truly crushed them with guilt. The wizard will never contact you again.</quote>This makes the no option much more appealing tbh.</quote> ... Copied to Clipboard!
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Pogo_Marimo 04/20/23 5:33:40 PM #18:	alfred_ashford posted... Yes I would and then I would suggest an open relationship lol This guy gets it. --- 'Cause you know that I have no fear, ain't gonna walk into the river and disappear. I'm gonna be a powerful man. Red blood running down the broken sand. <cite>Pogo_Marimo posted [p:972970794] in There's a ... [t:80417739]...</cite> <quote>alfred_ashford posted... </cite><quote>Yes I would and then I would suggest an open relationship lol</quote>This guy gets it.</quote> ... Copied to Clipboard!
RetsuZaiZen 04/20/23 5:38:52 PM #19:	20 years in? Man at that point it's full sunken cost at best. Basically, if she cheated once in year 3 I'm not throwing everything else away. That said I'm not pressing the button. --- Why do nerds always get caught up on the details? Michael Jordan is both the greatest and most overrated basketball player of all time. <cite>RetsuZaiZen posted [p:972970902] in There's a ... [t:80417739]...</cite> <quote>20 years in? Man at that point it's full sunken cost at best. Basically, if she cheated once in year 3 I'm not throwing everything else away. That said I'm not pressing the button. </quote> ... Copied to Clipboard!
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ekie 04/20/23 5:44:39 PM #21:	HairyQueen posted... Interesting. You could do that anyway though No he can't. Don't give advise that could end relationships --- ALL HAIL LORD DUNCAN! http://imgur.com/vsYREtU.jpg https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UZc3uq56JKU <cite>ekie posted [p:972971036] in There's a ... [t:80417739]...</cite> <quote>HairyQueen posted... </cite><quote>Interesting. You could do that anyway though</quote>No he can't. Don't give advise that could end relationships</quote> ... Copied to Clipboard!
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Current Events > There's a button you can press that will tell you if your partner has cheated (+) Yeah! (+)

Current Events > There's a button you can press that will tell you if your partner has cheated