Poll of the Day > my alcoholic father physically assaulted me tonight

(+) Yeah! (+)

we went out to dinner to celebrate my new job and car. dude got trashed (like he does every single time i see him) and started arguing that i had bird pee on my car lol

he got so mad when i told him birds shit and piss at the same time and that i did not have bird pee or shit on my car. charged at me and tried to choke me on the sidewalk.

i wish i were making this up, it was out of fucking nowhere. it was honestly extremely upsetting. never seen him get physically aggressive like this with anyone.

Thats awful. Alcohol is terrible.

i like to drink but like i dont get how its even remotely enjoyable when youre getting this upset and angry every night from drinking. idk, i guess i dont really understand the addiction side of it. i wish him well but hes been an alcoholic since i was born, it just seems to be getting way worse lately.

really worried these neck marks are gonna be hard to hide when i start my new job

That's a felony, put ur dad in prison

I'm sorry that happened to you, buddy. My Mom can't handle her wine and I've walked out on her rude ass 3 times at dinners. It's one reason why I can't have dinner with them and my girlfriend. Both women are type A personalities and it would be a fucking war.

I walked nearly 8 miles in the rain and cold one night on my birthday because I had been driven to the restaurant. They had the cops out looking for me. I'm glad they never found me. One of the best walks I've had.

How does one stop birds from peeing on your car anyway?

Sorry this happened to you. Was he blackout drunk?

That is terrible. Do you have any other family members to help you get your father help?

Wow I'm really sorry that happened

That's awful! I definitely would cut him out of my life after that. :( Its high time he gets himself some help if he's assaulting his own family over something so petty.

You should take photographs of your injuries.

That wasn't bird pee, that was my special mayo

Do you still live him? Are you still a minor?

If so, thne I suggest you step away for awhile and if possible stay with another relative

If not, then maybe see about getting into a Shelter or something temporary until tempers die down

And if he has a history of this type of behavior, then maybe you should start to reevaluate your relationship with him

This is really awful, I'm sorry you experienced this.

Are you somewhere safe now? I'm sure you have a lot of feelings right now, do you have someone outside of PotD you are comfortable talking to?

This is 100% assault, if you would be justified to press charges, but I understand if you don't want to think of that right now. Has he ever experienced rehab or an intervention?

That sucks, dude. Based on your comments it seems like youre resigned to accept this is who he is and are content continuing a relationship with him, but I will say cutting my alcoholic toxic abusive (verbally/mentally, not physically) step-father and his mother out of my life has been one of the best life decisions Ive ever made and was a huge boost to my mental health. You have no obligation to stick around abusive and toxic family members. Something worth considering.

I cut out my toxic parents and my life also vastly improved.

i dont live with him

i wont be talking to him for a long time

Im sorry to hear this.

Youve made the right choice by just not talking to him for a while.

DirtBasedSoap posted...

i dont live with him

i wont be talking to him for a long time

i haven't talked to my parents in over 2 years and they still try to make my life hard so just protect yourself still. i wish you luck.

its weird cause he is a really nice guy when he isnt drunk. a little old fashioned but still a decent human being. i suspect that hes upset that Im actually doing something with my life and its made him reflect on how much time hes wasted as he enters the later stages of his life. idk, dont really wanna armchair psychologist but thats my guess as to why he lashed out so hard. also the alcohol obviously lol

Sorry to hear that. Is your neck in pain?

nah, the marks are pretty much already gone now too

DirtBasedSoap posted...

its weird cause he is a really nice guy when he isnt drunk. a little old fashioned but still a decent human being. i suspect that hes upset that Im actually doing something with my life and its made him reflect on how much time hes wasted as he enters the later stages of his life. idk, dont really wanna armchair psychologist but thats my guess as to why he lashed out so hard. also the alcohol obviously lol

Yeah that's what it sounds like. My dad has never really done much with his life and he's always negative when I tell him something good that has happened in my life. I'll tell about some really good gig my band gets and he'll always say something like "well I hope they're paying you well" and then I'll tell him what the amount is and no matter how high the amount he'll be like, "is that it?" Either that or he gives an obviously forced "that's great" kinda response. Never has physically assaulted me though

lmao yeah i told him Ive been having fun playing open mics the last couple of months and hes like why would you do that for free

i dont know dude, maybe because i fuckin enjoy it?

DirtBasedSoap posted...

lmao yeah i told him Ive been having fun playing open mics the last couple of months and hes like why would you do that for free

i dont know dude, maybe because i fuckin enjoy it?

lmao what a debbie downer

Funny that doing something because you enjoy it is such a foreign concept to some people

This sucks man. It's good you can cut ties from him. My dad isn't a alcoholic but he a negative piece of shit with a temper. I had a good day yesterday spending time with my brother and nephew. When I got home my dad was abusive and didn't seem to give a shit about his son or grandchild. He then decided to get my computer chair and attempt to put it onto my neck claiming he would kill me. He then punched me in my nose and that obviously bleed a lot. It doesn't help I've had surgery on my nose to have it put back in place. It still bleeds now when I blow my nose and it's bruised a bit.

I unfortunately live with dad but I haven't spoken with him all day, he hasn't apologised and I doubt he will. I'm not going to report this but I for sure need to find work and to move out. Can't be having pointless wastes of space in my life that do nothing but shit on other peoples happiness and refuse to fix their own shit.

Dysfunctional dad train wooo. Im sorry you dealt with that though. My dad was also shit. The kind of guy who would chastise me for my weight while also screaming at joggers that they were gonna die anyways while driving by them.

wwinterj25 posted...

This sucks man. It's good you can cut ties from him. My dad isn't a alcoholic but he a negative piece of shit with a temper. I had a good day yesterday spending time with my brother and nephew. When I got home my dad was abusive and didn't seem to give a shit about his son or grandchild. He then decided to get my computer chair and attempt to put it onto my neck claiming he would kill me. He then punched me in my nose and that obviously bleed a lot. It doesn't help I've had surgery on my nose to have it put back in place. It still bleeds now when I blow my nose and it's bruised a bit.

I unfortunately live with dad but I haven't spoken with him all day, he hasn't apologised and I doubt he will. I'm not going to report this but I for sure need to find work and to move out. Can't be having pointless wastes of space in my life that do nothing but shit on other peoples happiness and refuse to fix their own shit.

sorry to hear what happened and hope that you're all right. That being said, you should dial 988 (that's the new mental health hotline) and get advice from them as to what to do in your situation. Good luck.

damn, winter. I am so sorry that happened to ya.

Not like its a contest but that sounds a lot worse than what happened to me last night. Luckily my dad was so drunk he couldnt really do anything to really hurt me. He tried to punch me in the face and it was the weakest punch Ive ever felt.

I really hope youre able to get away from him soon.

GastroFan posted...

sorry to hear what happened and hope that you're all right.

DirtBasedSoap posted...

damn, winter. I am so sorry that happened to ya.

Thanks to you both.

I really hope youre able to get away from him soon.

Yeah I hope so too.

I think the weirdest thing about having dysfunctional relatives is that nobody without them gets how big a problem it can be. You can get stuck in an imbalanced relationship you can't escape from at any age, and you can't always tell by looking. Things aren't always bad with abusive people every single day like in the movies, and some of the worst stuff can be subtle.