Current Events > You're going drinking with a depressed old friend when Wonder Woman asks you out

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UnfairRepresent
08/07/21 9:48:18 AM
#1:


What do you do?


Your old friend has come back into town and you've agreed to meet for drinks.

He says he's been feeling down since he lost his job and this is the first thing he has been looking forward too in months.

But then on the day you stumble upon Wonder Woman and Hawkgirl beating the ever loving shit out of Captain Boomerang before tossing him like a sack of garbage into the back of a police car.

" Rape, Murder, Arson, Public Urination, Theft, Terroristic Threats, Kidnapping Assault, Forgery... And once again it's a man being a complete pig. I'm telling you, you don't get any of that in Themyscira where our sisters show each other respect and dignity. There's something wrong with men. I don't get how you put up with them." Wonder Woman laments

"Don't knock it till you tried it honey, there's plenty of good men out there. Like this guy." Hawkgirl says while pointing her mace in your direction

"Well he's not too bad I guess, but I bet he's just like the others." Wonder Woman bemoans

"Dont underestimate people. Give him a chance and I guarantee he will surprise ya. Go on, go ask him out." Hawkgirl prods

"No I.. He wouldn't....I can't.... He's just going to say no anyway. Besides I'm only free tonight." Wonder Woman says sheepishly while blushing

Suddenly Hawkgirl launches into the air, flies next to you, taps you on the shoulder and says "Hey, my friend Diana over there would love to take you out to dinner tonight. She's just shy. You up for it? Just take my advice and don't order Greek. Savvy?"

Oh no! Tonight!? That's when you're meeting your friend! It clashes.





You can't do both

What do you do?


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Dingydang166
08/07/21 9:50:41 AM
#2:


Uh he lost his job, that means he has plenty of free time now. We can reschedule for tomorrow. A REAL friend would be fucking stoked to see me have a CHANCE at fucking Wonder Woman.
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3PiesAndAFork
08/07/21 10:01:54 AM
#3:


Say I'm busy with my friend here, but I'd be more than happy to take her out to dinner tomorrow evening if she'd leave me her number.

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@('_')@
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Heliogabalus
08/07/21 10:03:02 AM
#4:


Your hypotheticals are deeply problematic at their very core.

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Solution_45
08/07/21 10:03:45 AM
#5:


bros before hoes

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superman 2000
08/07/21 10:05:02 AM
#6:


Dingydang166 posted...
Uh he lost his job, that means he has plenty of free time now. We can reschedule for tomorrow. A REAL friend would be fucking stoked to see me have a CHANCE at fucking Wonder Woman.

lol guilt-tripping.

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Lokison
08/07/21 10:10:20 AM
#7:


Say I'm flattered, but I have to show my friend here some respect and dignity.

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YookaLaylee
08/07/21 10:14:16 AM
#8:


Cant you invite your friend to come too and double date with Hawkgirl?
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divot1338
08/07/21 10:17:00 AM
#9:


YookaLaylee posted...
Cant you invite your friend to come too and double date with Hawkgirl?
Hawkman is going to kick your ass.

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YookaLaylee
08/07/21 10:18:05 AM
#10:


divot1338 posted...

Hawkman is going to kick your ass.

Im not the one who cheated on him. And my friend would be the one dating her lol
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UnfairRepresent
08/07/21 10:18:07 AM
#11:


Heliogabalus posted...
Your hypotheticals are deeply problematic at their very core.
Maybehaps but they're more about a thought experiment about how you might handle potential dilemmas than anything else

besides the more effort you put into them making absolute coherent sense the less people read them

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Heliogabalus
08/07/21 10:20:08 AM
#12:


UnfairRepresent posted...
Maybehaps but they're more about a thought experiment about how you might handle potential dilemmas than anything else

besides the more effort you put into then making absolute coherent sense the less people read them
You may be onto something there.

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Master Kazuya
08/07/21 10:38:10 AM
#13:


Friend can reschedule, Wonder Woman can't

If he's a real one, he'd totally understand and vice versa, I'd be okay if someone flaked on me to date Wonder Woman

Don't willingly give up chances at love, it's hard enough

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TendoDRM
08/07/21 10:40:22 AM
#14:


"Sorry, I don't date rapists."

We all know what you did in 1984, Diana.

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shiby with it
08/07/21 10:43:23 AM
#15:


YookaLaylee posted...
Im not the one who cheated on him. And my friend would be the one dating her lol
Plus you could just get Wonder Woman to beat his ass. Hawkman's a *****.

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Lordgold666
08/07/21 10:52:53 AM
#16:


*drives off with lynda carter*

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The_Korey
08/07/21 11:04:07 AM
#17:


Dingydang166 posted...
Uh he lost his job, that means he has plenty of free time now. We can reschedule for tomorrow. A REAL friend would be fucking stoked to see me have a CHANCE at fucking Wonder Woman.


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UnfairRepresent
08/07/21 11:24:24 AM
#18:


YookaLaylee posted...
Cant you invite your friend to come too and double date with Hawkgirl?
And then John Stewart beats the holy fuck out of your friend with a giant middle finger made from green energy



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IfGodCouldDie
08/07/21 12:24:46 PM
#19:


I'd prove not all men are bad by politely declining saying I have prior plans with a friend who is down and out.

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BilalPowell
08/07/21 12:32:45 PM
#20:


It's Wonder Woman. I'll just ask her to let him work for the Justice League in return for going out with her and we're good.

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YookaLaylee
08/07/21 1:28:17 PM
#21:


UnfairRepresent posted...

And then John Stewart beats the holy fuck out of your friend with a giant middle finger made from green energy



And then I courageously step forward to defend my friend, showing the ring that Im more deserving of it than John Stewart and I become a new Green Lantern
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- Jamie Madrox
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rexcrk
08/07/21 1:39:00 PM
#22:


Dingydang166 posted...
Uh he lost his job, that means he has plenty of free time now. We can reschedule for tomorrow. A REAL friend would be fucking stoked to see me have a CHANCE at fucking Wonder Woman.
/topic

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Paragon21XX
08/07/21 2:16:57 PM
#23:


UnfairRepresent posted...
And then John Stewart beats the holy fuck out of your friend with a giant middle finger made from green energy

And then Lobo from Injustice 2 comes by and cockslaps John Stewart with a giant dick made from green energy.

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Hmm...
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Mist_Turnips
08/07/21 2:18:23 PM
#24:


Hang with my buddy of course. Wonder woman is trash.
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sabrestorm
08/07/21 2:19:04 PM
#25:


Solution_45 posted...
bros before hoes

only in tv shows
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Returning_CEmen
08/07/21 2:19:09 PM
#26:


My friend would understand

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UnfairRepresent
08/07/21 4:30:10 PM
#27:


YookaLaylee posted...
And then I courageously step forward to defend my friend, showing the ring that Im more deserving of it than John Stewart and I become a new Green Lantern
Genius

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UnfairRepresent
08/08/21 9:06:26 AM
#28:


Looks like CE is abandoning their friend

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DevilZhouYu
08/08/21 9:20:00 AM
#29:


IfGodCouldDie posted...
I'd prove not all men are bad by politely declining saying I have prior plans with a friend who is down and out.
I'm gonna extend this shit.

I do exactly this, Hawkgirl relays said message to WW, WW is impressed I would actually turn her down to help someone who is down and out, she walks over, takes a rain check, I help my buddy AND get a date with WW at a later date when she's free (she knows where I live, she's part of the JL, ffs. And if she doesn't, Batman can look that shit up)

Sometimes you have to play the long game.
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Nukazie
08/08/21 9:22:27 AM
#30:


i might as well be the depressed friend and i'd rather have my friend be with WW

oh and i'll go with WW if i'm the friend

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UnfairRepresent
08/09/21 6:34:37 AM
#31:


DevilZhouYu posted...
I'm gonna extend this shit.

I do exactly this, Hawkgirl relays said message to WW, WW is impressed I would actually turn her down to help someone who is down and out, she walks over, takes a rain check, I help my buddy AND get a date with WW at a later date when she's free (she knows where I live, she's part of the JL, ffs. And if she doesn't, Batman can look that shit up)

Sometimes you have to play the long game.
A job at the Justice League as a generic goon sounds like a ticking clock before a supervillain kills you to me

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BloodMoon7
08/09/21 6:49:21 AM
#32:


I don't like Wonder Woman but on the other hand, what old friend? I never kept in touch with people. I was the one who left.

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OwlRammer
08/09/21 6:59:08 AM
#33:


IfGodCouldDie posted...
I'd prove not all men are bad by politely declining saying I have prior plans with a friend who is down and out.
This, I'm sure given the conversation the two had she would come seek me out later anyways win win situation

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The_Korey
08/09/21 7:22:37 AM
#34:


Also, everyone knows that I don't drink, so fuck this "friend" for tryna drag me down with him.

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UnfairRepresent
08/09/21 7:41:54 AM
#35:


The_Korey posted...
Also, everyone knows that I don't drink, so fuck this "friend" for tryna drag me down with him.
Not all drinks are alcoholic

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BloodMoon7
08/09/21 7:47:26 AM
#36:


UnfairRepresent posted...
Not all drinks are alcoholic
Finna ordering water at da bar

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IfGodCouldDie
08/09/21 7:47:57 AM
#37:


BloodMoon7 posted...
Finna ordering water at da bar
Designated Drivers are a thing.

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BloodMoon7
08/09/21 7:48:32 AM
#38:


IfGodCouldDie posted...
Designated Drivers are a thing.
Well I can't drive so there.

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IfGodCouldDie
08/09/21 7:54:18 AM
#39:


BloodMoon7 posted...
Well I can't drive so there.
I don't care

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BloodMoon7
08/09/21 7:56:22 AM
#40:


IfGodCouldDie posted...
I don't care
And?

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The_Korey
08/09/21 8:21:50 AM
#41:


BloodMoon7 posted...
Well I can't drive so there.

Same. Riding a scooter is more well known about me than my distaste for alcohol n bars/pubs.

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UnfairRepresent
08/09/21 6:05:20 PM
#42:


BloodMoon7 posted...
Well I can't drive so there.
oh snap!

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