Current Events > Have to have a meeting with my boss due to words I used in office, thoughts ??

(+) Yeah! (+)

happened today, I was in the dead wrong, i went to the office and someone was using spray paint for xmas deco in their office, i go down the hall and say wtf pretty loudly and then when I ask whats the smell and why someone is using it i say thats "effing r-wrod" I know the r word is a pretty bad word to say. my co-woker who as in office cubicle, said she will go to HR for me saying that. first time i said that word and I haven't used it out loud or anything

I have a meeting with my supervisor tomorrow about this.

I know im in the wrong but if roles reversed and they said a word that bothered me, i wouldn't go to my supervisor to taddle on me, I would just go face to face and say hey thats not a word i like to hear, etc.

am I being in the wrong thinking its petty to go to my supervisor that i said that? my coworker is 31 i think not that it matters.

I obv shoudl NOT have used those words at all the f words and especially the r word. i did not apologize after I said that even when that person said

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Lmao your coworkers petty as fuck

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PlsGodDontBanMe posted...

Lmao your coworkers petty as fuck

I talk to her about 2-3x a week with general topics, never once have I felt I was mean or anything like that toward her.

my other co worker who sits next to me and has known me for years thinks its pretty ridiculous

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First time offence its pretty lame. She coulda just been like 'lol thats so inappropriate' THEN reported you if it was an on going thing

I reported a fat bitch to HR and got her fired but i put up with her shit for months and she was lazy as shit and just overall a toxic person to work with. so i knew racist jokes she made would get her fired. I just documented them as she said them and when I really had enough of her shit just went to the boss who took it to HR.

toyota posted...

First time offence its pretty lame. She coulda just been like 'lol thats so inappropriate' THEN reported you if it was an on going thing

I reported a fat bitch to HR and got her fired but i put up with her shit for months and she was lazy as shit and just overall a toxic person to work with. so i knew racist jokes she made would get her fired. I just documented them as she said them and when I really had enough of her shit just went to the boss who took it to HR.

yes I understand if I kept using it which I never would over and over again. but I just think its super petty. I woudl love to titl this story in favor of the coworker so it makes it seem im in the wrong. but I feel its hard to do. most people i talked to said you shouldnt have said that but for first offence to go straight to boss that is childish, wantd toi know what everyone here thought


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@toyota

sorry that happened to you btw

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final bump before night, idk why its causing me such anxiety. on one hand its super disappointing I said it on the other it really burns and irritates me that it went straight above me without talking to me since it was a first offense thing.

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The coworker who tattled on you would be on my "Do Not Talk To" list for a while, personally. Yes, it is something you shouldn't have said. But to go to HR over a one time thing... makes me feel like said coworker either secretly has a problem with you, or sees you as a stepping stone.

Either way i'm sorry dude. It's all gonna shake out okay though, just have accept that you can't change what's happening tomorrow and to face the music.

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Your tone was bad since you said all this loudly. Makes it sound more angry than casual. The R word is a no-no, especially in a workplace. Profanity in general is also a no-no in some workplaces. You were also shitting on the Christmas decoration process which is supposed to light and cheery. You were wrong on several levels.

Apologize and show contrition, fake it if you have to. Be thankful that your boss probably won't fire anyone this close to Christmas. You will be on thin ice from now on, keep that in mind.

Unspecified_NPC posted...

The coworker who tattled on you would be on my "Do Not Talk To" list for a while, personally. Yes, it is something you shouldn't have said. But to go to HR over a one time thing... makes me feel like said coworker either secretly has a problem with you, or sees you as a stepping stone.

Either way i'm sorry dude. It's all gonna shake out okay though, just have accept that you can't change what's happening tomorrow and to face the music.

@Unspecified_NPC
I wont get fired i know that, and since my reputation around the office is very solid and reputable. I will be told if it happens again, i will be prolly gone. I am regretful i said the r word, but you are correct with your first sentence too. I will def be scolded and talked to with a very bad tone tho

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Big_Gold posted...

Your tone was bad since you said all this loudly. Makes it sound more angry than casual. The R word is a no-no, especially in a workplace. Profanity in general is also a no-no in some workplaces. You were also shitting on the Christmas decoration process which is supposed to light and cheery. You were wrong on several levels.

Apologize and show contrition, fake it if you have to. Be thankful that your boss probably won't fire anyone this close to Christmas. You will be on thin ice from now on, keep that in mind.

@Big_Gold
yes thanks, as I said above, I wont be fired but if it happens again i will be in trouble, I have reputable with a lot of other supervisors who know me.

again its the gogin to hr part that bothers me, I just am worried I wont be sincere enough in my apology, I am super regretful i said the r word and I said it out loud once ever and that was that but i will think this is petty but I will eb apologetic.

thank you

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Whats your relationship with her? Did you think you guys were cool or was she just a coworker that you occasionally dealt with.

Also how are you feeling about your position at work? Are you more worried about losing your job or something?

I had the same sort of anxieties too when my case went to HR seeing that I dont want to be known as some sort of rat or snake. Nearly everyone had problems with this coworker or got bad vibes from her if they just met. Despite all the transfers and other formal complaints nothing seemed to happen and she always found a way to get out of it until i went in with my shit. The fact that I even got the point where I was recording/documenting stuff on a fellow coworker made me feel so sick and felt more like I was betraying every other coworker that I was cool with. I mean, im the type of dude who usually covers for people if bosses try to nit pick shit

@toyota

i tlaked to her 2x 3x a week small chit chat,m ive been workign here for 4 years this is her 4th month on the job but she and her supervisor is very close to the "boss" ,

our relationship i felt was fine. obv my other coworker has known me for 2 years and he thinks this is all ridculous especially since its only firt time ive ever said it

as I said in previous post my job is safe but idk if i can ever move up now if this curent boss is here. i have a lot of other supervisors that can vouch for me tho. I shouldnt have said it and regret doing so, just need to be apologetic but damn its just irritating lol.

thank you, that sounds very toxic and thats not liek my work at all, sucks people. such as yourself, have to go through that.

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She's a bitch

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anyway to make this story titl in her favor? even if im firs time offence for R word? as someone said in another post how I should have apologized when she said she was going to HR, I did not apologize.

it doesn't help that her and her supervision are super close with the overall boss, if it was anyone else, I dont think its this big of a deal. my other cowerks prolly wouldn't have said anything about it

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Maybe just say the smell of the fumes caught you off guard and got to you?

Like we all know swearing at work is bad but can you really be faulted if say you banged your leg into something and accidentally cursed. Sounds like a similar situation.

What is your co-worker like anyways. Weird that someone would go to HR for something like that straight away. Maybe she was the one doing or came up with the idea of the spray painting lmao

toyota posted...

Maybe just say the smell of the fumes caught you off guard and got to you?

Like we all know swearing at work is bad but can you really be faulted if say you banged your leg into something and accidentally cursed. Sounds like a similar situation.

What is your co-worker like anyways. Weird that someone would go to HR for something like that straight away. Maybe she was the one doing or came up with the idea of the spray painting lmao

@toyota her supervisor was yes. and as I said her and supervisor are close to boss. her supervisor would be hte one to tell her to tell hr or my boss

I worked here for 4 years and sometimes say f word out loud at work next to my other coworkers and co workers past and never been reported or they told me anything. but new crow d so its diff and I shouldn't say bad language at work. thank you. i ll try to be aplogetic its petty but i wont talk to her anymore tbh and no I can 100% with confidence say ther was no bad blood between us. anyone else and it woudl have been a non issue even tho i was in wrong for saying those words.

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im going to bed but shes in her fuckign 30s man like wtf, how fucking petty do you have to fucking be fir first time offense, such fucking bullshit. its super fuckign petty and due to office politics I cant confront her about it becuase it would make things worse which I would 100% like to do in this situation

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You don't know her, maybe she has a loved one with special needs and using the word like that hurts a lot.

Just don't use that word like that.

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Wetterdew posted...

You don't know her, maybe she has a loved one with special needs and using the word like that hurts a lot.

Just don't use that word like that.

absolutely cannot use words like that, if I had a borther or sister or family member like that I would confront said person and say this is my situation dont use that word in front of me again or else.

I am NOT going to HR, right away even if they dont aplogize but that doesnt matter thast not theissue here. I was in the wrong, I know

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ryudo500 posted...

@Big_Gold
yes thanks, as I said above, I wont be fired but if it happens again i will be in trouble, I have reputable with a lot of other supervisors who know me.

again its the gogin to hr part that bothers me, I just am worried I wont be sincere enough in my apology, I am super regretful i said the r word and I said it out loud once ever and that was that but i will think this is petty but I will eb apologetic.

thank you

My advice would be to make eye contact (non-creepy eye contact) when you apologize to your boss. And don't let on that you're pissed at your co-worker or the situation that you're in, that's a dead giveaway that your apology is insincere.

Big_Gold posted...

My advice would be to make eye contact (non-creepy eye contact) when you apologize to your boss. And don't let on that you're pissed at your co-worker or the situation that you're in, that's a dead giveaway that your apology is insincere.

yes you are right thank you. I will hate to apologize to the co worker though. i dont think im man enough to handle that.

i will be apologetic for sure though, say that is lngauge not tolerated in our work environment and not the atmosphere or attitude or culture tryign to instill around here. always want to be anmbassador not just for our dpt area but for our work.

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You tell that fucker to shut their yap and mind their own damned business.

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LOL that might get me donzed. maybe lol

im goign to bed gnight yall thank you for the wisdom, i ll post back and tell you hwo it went, if i get fired it means I blew up but I doubtthat happens.

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Ilishe posted...

She's a bitch

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She outed herself as your enemy. Be polite and smile at her in morning, but never trust her again. Begin quietly plotting in ways you can destroy her career/life. Be polite and smile when you finally do.

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I'm at the point where I would just assume shovel shit, then work in an environment with an HR department.

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If it makes you feel better, your HR person probably hates that they have to do all this shit surrounding this. Imagine being at your job and people giving you all of this extra work because they cant bring themselves to tell coworkers to stfu.

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PlsGodDontBanMe posted...

Lmao your coworkers petty as fuck

I mean, I had a co-worker get me fired by my supervisor and then had THEM take me to court because they felt I was "mentally unstable and not creating/promoting a safe work environment."

The cop and the judge laughed out loud in the courtroom and immediately dropped the charge.

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Apologize to boss, ignore coworker.

If you get fired, seek revenge on her.

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Jiek_Fafn posted...

If it makes you feel better, your HR person probably hates that they have to do all this shit surrounding this. Imagine being at your job and people giving you all of this extra work because they cant bring themselves to tell coworkers to stfu.

haha I know stacey the HR girl, while she would be surprised ot hear about this I dont think she would hate me plus its not somethign she woudl bring in the office to talk about she woudl just leave it to the boss instead. youre right

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Conflict posted...

Going to HR over that is stupid

@Conflict I think its stupid but i shouldnt have said it my metting got pushed up due to other meetings.

itis petty both her and her supervisor

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jumi posted...

Apologize to boss, ignore coworker.

If you get fired, seek revenge on her.

@jumi correct, I will not get fired unless I handle myself poorly which I will try not to, I think ill be ale to apologize

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Kolibri X posted...

She outed herself as your enemy. Be polite and smile at her in morning, but never trust her again. Begin quietly plotting in ways you can destroy her career/life. Be polite and smile when you finally do.

LOL @Kolibri_X

while I wont do the latter, I will def not talk to her again. I think at this point, to do something like that EVEN IF her supervisor was the one who said to do it or did it, im done with both

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Guys the thing is, I really really want to confront and say how petty and how borderline childish I personally find her going to the boss/HR about all of this really is and that she should have said something further TO ME IN PERSON if she wanted an apology or whatever. no need ot go above since its not like im sporting the r word, first time offense.

if she heard me swear before, and doesn't like that either, let me know as well. no need ot go above me when my cubicle is right there you can talk to me face to face and I wont get into a shouting match with you I woudl hear you out.

I just want to call her out but office politics wont let me. liek many said i ll be a good little boy and just suck it up and apologize to boss, I hope he doesn't make me apologize to her though, because I didn't say it in a term like that TO her


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seems like you struck a nerve or she has been looking for an excuse to go to hr and found it. either way you fucked up, just own it and apologize and youll probably be fine.

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BuckVanHammer posted...

seems like you struck a nerve or she has been looking for an excuse to go to hr and found it. either way you fucked up, just own it and apologize and youll probably be fine.

@BuckVanHammer
yes thank you, I wont get fired but will be scolded harshly, thank you.

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Imagine being an adult and tattling. Fuck that b word.

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ryudo500 posted...

i went to the office and someone was using spray paint for xmas deco in their office,

where do you work? never seen a can of spray paint in any office ever
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Rebel_Patriot posted...

Imagine being an adult and tattling. Fuck that b word.

other than what I said a few posts ago yeah I just think its petty.

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How did it go, TC?

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PalmerSensei posted...

How did it go, TC?

@PalmerSensei
thank you palmer..

I was a little bitch, I apologized 130x saying its terrible usage that should never be used. there were two bosses, the one did most of th talking about how he knows I want to move up and this language isnt tolerated aroudn here and this should be a teaching moment moving forward and that we can all lern form this. also said about his neice and again about future employers when they call and how he cant lie and wants to say good things and that I need to apologize to the person.

the other boss just said about the surrounding and did say at one point that "it did smell very strongly" I felt that was a jab to teh other boss tbh LOL

hardest thing was apologizing to the other person I did it, she said she didnt mind the f bombs at al but didn't like the r word. 30misn later she tried to strike up conversation with me about random things where I went to school and about xmas decorations for the office. I felt awkward because I didnt want to talk to her but felt I needed to answer her questions and dilogue so I avoid further issues?

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nah fuck that, don't humor her small talk. Be as professional as you need to be with her but outside of that, ignore her

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thast fair

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Wtf are you doing TC?

PlsGodDontBanMe posted...

don't humor her small talk

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I might've missed it but what kind of job is it anyway?

Sounds like U got off reasonably fair for what happened though. I wouldn't trust that person at all though and wouldn't entertain them in the future.

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I can understand being offended at the R word considering you know nothing about her personal life snd family members which is something the people here attacking her clearly havent thought of.

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Don't talk to her about anything that isn't work related. She got HR involved in a trivial matter that could've been resolved by just talking to you about it, and now after all that she expects you to be cheery and all smiles with her? Fuck that...

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