Current Events > 2018 was such a shit year for me lmao

(+) Yeah! (+)

-got into the university of my dreams 5 months before 2018 started, only to enroll there and then hate it
-it's a really prestigious school so a lot of the people are rich, attractive, very successful, extremely smart, and just generally great so I felt like a fucking loser coming from a poor, abusive family
-became a drug addict and gained like 150 lbs at the same time
-went into credit card debt despite trying very hard to avoid it beforehand but I said "fuck it" so I went into debt
-thought of suicide more days than not
-went into therapy because it was so bad (I guess this is a positive but I'd rather not need to go at all)
-because of the stuff above i had no friends this year, i sort of made friends but would always act shitty to them / do something to get them away from me. plus I didn't want people knowing all I did was eat and do drugs in my car 90% of the time
-got a complete shit GPA 2 out of 3 terms at aforementioned university
-lost a scholarship because of that. didn't even care at the time
and more that I'm probably forgetting!

I went from having a ton of potential to being a complete trainwreck of a person in a year's time. It's kind of funny. 2017 was the year of me feeling super confident and realizing my potential, thinking I would be the first in my family to become middle class. 2018 was the year of shit and feeling like a bigger loser than ever, and fucking up my life. I guess 2019 will be the year of fixing what I fucked up in 2018 (or attempting to fix it). This isn't a New Year's resolution or anything, it actually was just kind of a coincidence that I decided to quit drugs and stop eating 999999999 calories per day right before the year ended (I stopped drugs right before Christmas). I feel pretty driven and am making a serious attempt at this compared to my other half-assed attempts to stop, so I am sure I will succeed. I am anxious, but overall excited to see how my life plays out.

I got a DUI this year so I feel you. Just hang in there bud.
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I had a great year. Too good in fact, I have a feeling i'm due for a bad year.
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What drugs did you addict?
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Sounds like a typical CEman
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Being overwhelmed your first year is nothing to worry about, just a whole lot of new parameters to deal with. Most people go through it same as you, and they're fine. Just be prepared in a few years when you graduate. Your life will go through another major change, but as long as you can adapt, you'll be fine.
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008Zulu posted...

Being overwhelmed your first year is nothing to worry about, just a whole lot of new parameters to deal with. Most people go through it same as you, and they're fine. Just be prepared in a few years when you graduate. Your life will go through another major change, but as long as you can adapt, you'll be fine.

I'm graduating next year :P I'm a transfer student.

It's okay though, I feel pretty confident I'll have my shit together by then.

The first part made me worry. I'm hoping to transfer into a university next year that I always wished I had gone to. Scared the difficulty spike might be too much.
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Vita_Aeterna posted...

The first part made me worry. I'm hoping to transfer into a university next year that I always wished I had gone to. Scared the difficulty spike might be too much.

Don't. The difficulty spike is not actually that insane (unless you're going to Caltech or MIT or something), I mostly just stopped caring about schoolwork once I left my other school. Not caring when you're in 300 level CS classes is a recipe for disaster.