Current Events > attn: CEers who have slept with their ex after breaking up, i need advice

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my friend is going through this process now and is asking for help

she broke up with her bf around 2 months ago. at first they stopped speaking completely. she was angry at him, played petty games towards one another, then blocked him, etc

and because they're in the same friendship group, they are at the same parties occasionally. at my birthday party last month, she was telling me that she didn't love him and she was completely over him, although he's clearly not over her. the day after my birthday party, there was another party where they both bumped into each other but didn't say anything. then ended up speaking to each other on the phone for 4 hours when they both went home

and i found out that they went to another party last weekend and have been speaking every day since then, but purely on a friendship level. nothing too intimate but also completely avoiding the subject about breaking up or relationship stuff

and i've just found out that they went out for dinner, movies and then slept with each other afterwards. they both definitely have feelings for each other, but i don't think they want to get back into a relationship

is this healthy? i feel like telling her that it's fine as long as she's not getting hurt. but i feel like it's going to make everything 100x worse
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much like dr. strange, i have run 14,000,065 scenarios and found only one where this ends well for both parties, & that is one where they had a very casual relationship to begin with & never had strong feelings beyond physical/social attraction
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Parappa09 posted...

is this healthy?

Depends on why they broke up but the answer to this question is 99% no. >_>
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Not gonna end well for him, but hes not gonna listen to anyone if they say nah, bro so let him have his fun and get heartbroken then take him with you to several strip clubs and places without her.

He honestly could probably do with this so he can be reminded that she really doesnt care about him like that and hell find himself grounded. He could also become an emotional wreck that needs the former pointed out to him.. and in time, with the help of his awesome friends, hell get over it.

I've never done the backslide, but here is my two cents.

Breaking up and getting back together happens. Usually there is a reason why people break up though and likely those reasons are still there and will show up again.

It likely wont work out again. But ultimately it is their life and if they want to try again that is their decision to make.
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never sleep with an ex; the breakup happened for a reason

those of us who have gotten back with an ex have inevitably learned this - for some, the hard way
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It's ok sometimes. A lot of couples are off and on., and a lot of them are fine together.

They could also get really hurt
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I've done this before and if the reason why they broke up hasn't changed in the first place then it's generally not gonna work out. I had to cut ties completely because the allure of having someone around that knows you so well and for the sex is hard to turn away from. The feelings are strong mane
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Well, it's their life. Sometimes it works... normally it doesn't but it's always worth a shot.
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MegaTech posted...

the allure of having someone around that knows you so well and for the sex is hard to turn away from. The feelings are strong mane

Bro, theyre fuckin brutal lol

Doesn't matter, had sex
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supercrono posted...

Doesn't matter, had sex

ex sex is the grand exception
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thanks for your help CE

i hope i dont get into this situation
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How many fuckin parties are you havin? Like you're not even in uni anymore.
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EpicMickeyDrew posted...

How many fuckin parties are you havin? Like you're not even in uni anymore.

as much as i can lol. i dont want to regret my youth or have a midlife crisis thinking that i havent done much >.>
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MegaTech posted...

I had to cut ties completely because the allure of having someone around that knows you so well and for the sex is hard to turn away from.

can't C any harder

rhklce posted...

MegaTech posted...

the allure of having someone around that knows you so well and for the sex is hard to turn away from. The feelings are strong mane

Bro, theyre fuckin brutal lol

Fucking right, it's like a damn drug lol. You either go cold turkey or you keep getting reeled back in.
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