Current Events > Is a single woman with a kid(s) a turn-off?

(+) Yeah! (+)

Makes you wonder if/why he left her or if/why she'd rather raise the kids alone.
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Yes. Not only because of the kid eventually becoming a responsibility for you, but childbirth can also basically massacre the vagina and I want none of that
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Yes. Not a deal breaker but a turn off for sure.
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bump
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Not really. I'd be put off if she had more than 2, I don't think I could handle that. I'd be less likely to approach a woman who had a son/sons. Boys are difficult in my experience and more aggressive.
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Only if she's a terrible parent.
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Depends on the number of baby daddies.
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Hard dealbreaker. Kids are the worst.
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Not for me
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SideshowBob311 posted...

Hard dealbreaker. Kids are the worst.

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Depends how gross she is, obviously.
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No, unattractive women tho...yes
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huge turnoff, shed have to be damn near perfect to consider anything more than a pump and dump. i aint down for raising some other fuckers little spawn
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I don't currently want kids right now, so yes, a turnoff.

Ask me at a point when I have kids, and probably wouldn't be a turn off?

YoshitoKikuchi posted...

Makes you wonder if/why he left her or if/why she'd rather raise the kids alone.

No, those aren't what come to my mind at all
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Muffinz0rz posted...

Yes. Not only because of the kid eventually becoming a responsibility for you, but childbirth can also basically massacre the vagina and I want none of that

Uhhh you know they go back to normal right?
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Its definitely a mark against her, but its no deal breaker. I dated a girl with a kid for a bit.
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If you haven't noticed, the general consensus is that it's a common turn off.
And that's not limited to CE.

A significant amount of eligible bachelors in their prime are not fans of dealing with what they consider is a single mom's "baggage". News media has frequently spoken about the long standing trend, occasionally encouraging men to "step up".

Single mothers are not innately unattractive; some can still manage to compensate enough to attract boyfriends. The point is their kids are still a common reason to have to compensate in the dating market, partly because transitioning the kids to accept a new a new partner can be extremely taxing for the adults involved. And it's why some single parents go to the extent of avoiding mention that they're parents in their dating profiles (ie: they wait to bring that up on the dates).

It's not even an issue limited to single mothers. There's plenty of single fathers too who notice steep increase in difficulty with keeping partners interested when kids from a prior relationship are a factor.
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Not automatically. I would give her a chance, but the line would be drawn if I was expected to be responsible for the kid/kids at all. I'm not into the idea of parenthood.
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ImTheMacheteGuy posted...

Not automatically. I would give her a chance, but the line would be drawn if I was expected to be responsible for the kid/kids at all. I'm not into the idea of parenthood.

Responsible for the kids when you start dating? Or even in the future?
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not if the woman doesn't need me to do anything with the kids. if she was hot and wanted to date me and had kids but didn't expect me to even meet them, it would be fine. I used to know a milfy lady around like 5 or more years older than me. and she had like 3 kids I think. and I would have dated her if she let me. she even had a really well paying job and would not need my support

I'm happily married and have a kid of my own so I can't necessarily 100% get into that mindset, but I'm 36, realistically most women in my age range are going to have kids. So just kind of have to go with it. I don't really mind kids, though, but I guess I'd want to know more about their family situation.
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emblem boy posted...

ImTheMacheteGuy posted...

Not automatically. I would give her a chance, but the line would be drawn if I was expected to be responsible for the kid/kids at all. I'm not into the idea of parenthood.

Responsible for the kids when you start dating? Or even in the future?

At this point yeah, either, both. I don't want to be in a position where they see me as a parental figure. If I'm seen as like a fun uncle who is around a lot, that's fine. I could babysit sometimes if they aren't too much of a pain in the ass and it's not sprung on me on short notice.
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Yes, as you'll basically end up cleaning up someone else's mess. You'll be expected to take the kids places, pay for their shit, etc. but heaven forbid you ever make any attempt to slightly discipline the kid by telling them to cut it out when they're in the store knocking shit off the shelves and shouting ICP lyrics at the top of their lungs. Then the mom will bitch at you non stop for the next 4 hours about how you're overstepping your bounds.
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DifferentialEquation posted...

Yes, as you'll basically end up cleaning up someone else's mess. You'll be expected to take the kids places, pay for their shit, etc. but heaven forbid you ever make any attempt to slightly discipline the kid by telling them to cut it out when they're in the store knocking shit off the shelves and shouting ICP lyrics at the top of their lungs. Then the mom will bitch at you non stop for the next 4 hours about how you're overstepping your bounds.

This post would have been better if you had made the scenario more specific.
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bump
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Biggest dealbreaker ever.

It's different now that I have my own kid (though I don't plan on ever dating again), but there's no way I would have ever dated a single mom before.

Nah, I love MILFs

depends how hot she is
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Complete dealbreaker. I dont date women with kids regardless any other qualities they might have. Not even good enough for hit and quit material either.
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YoshitoKikuchi posted...

Makes you wonder if/why he left her or if/why she'd rather raise the kids alone.

This, along with me having to deal with kids, plus possibly having to worry about baby daddy drama, plus the fact that I know I'll always be second rate to her kids and to their dad, plus a whole slew of other reasons make this an absolute dealbreaker for me.

Kolibri X posted...

Depends on the number of baby daddies.

This. No more than 2 baby daddies per kid.
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TheAnthraxBunny posted...

Kolibri X posted...

Depends on the number of baby daddies.

This. No more than 2 baby daddies per kid.

Kids are a turn-off period.
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Considering I have no interest in being a parent whatsoever, yeah. It's an auto-dealbreaker.
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I'm 27 and engaged, so if i was single right now and looking for women around my age, chances are the oldest their kid would be would be maybe 12 max? so that would be a deal breaker for me.

If I was 35 and the woman was mid 30s and had a 15 or 16 year old, that might not be a deal breaker.

Essentially, it's not so much a kid that would be a deal breaker. It'd be RAISING another kid that would be.
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