Current Events > Marine man arrested for having a fake penis

(+) Yeah! (+)

https://taskandpurpose.com/camp-pendleton-marine-fake-penis/

A Camp Pendleton Marine court-martialed for using and distributing illegal substances to his fellow Marines had, among many other things, a fake penis in his possession ostensibly used to defeat Corps urinalysis tests when he was stopped and searched by military police last year, according to court documents released last week.

In a May 17 decision, a military appeals court judge upheld the court-martial conviction of Cpl. John Kmiecik for violating the Articles 92 and 112a of the Uniform Code of Military Justice when he was discovered with a cache of LSD and marijuana during a traffic stop at Camp Pendleton in March 2017.

Apart from the LSD and marijuana, military police also stumbled across a Whizzinator brand artificial penis, plastic syringe, urine specimen bottle, and bottle of Clear Eyes Redness Relief.

After receiving an initial sentence of 15 months confinement, along with forfeiting pay and allowances and a reduction in grade to E-1 (minus a bad conduct discharge), Kmieck appealed on the grounds that the presiding judge abused his discretion during pre-sentencing by admitting a signed acknowledgment from the appellant that he understood the Marine Corps policy concerning illegal use of drugs. Which, well, lol.

Efforts to avoid a hot result in your piss test with prosthetic dongs like the Whizzinator have been commonplace for more than a decade.

Anyway, if you have a fake penis in your car, along with a buttload of acid and weed, maybe dont authorize military police to search your locked vehicle.

Footage of the marine in training:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YCyqb0GMfvE" data-time="
---

prosthetic dongs

---

So he was using it to pass drug tests huh.
---

smoliske posted...

Anyway, if you have a fake penis in your car, along with a buttload of acid and weed, maybe dont authorize military police to search your locked vehicle.

Or better yet, don't bring contraband onto a military base.
---

I wont say that during my 6 current years of service I havent been tempted to dip my toes into the ocean of psychedelics, just aint worth the consequences though.

2 more years...

mustachedmystic posted...

smoliske posted...

Anyway, if you have a fake penis in your car, along with a buttload of acid and weed, maybe dont authorize military police to search your locked vehicle.

Or better yet, don't bring contraband onto a military base.

Yeah, it's not like you can say no unless you want to lose your job. Sometimes they have random car searches when you're coming onto the base.
---

It's been several years since I've thought about Whizzinators. Great brand.
---

lol
---

lmao