Board 8 > How to Escape the Friendzone

(+) Yeah! (+)

http://heartiste.wordpress.com/2012/06/14/how-do-i-get-out-of-the-friend-zone/

I feel like this will be helpful to quite a few people.

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Answer: never be there to begin with.

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Oh he does open with that.

I have been there done that, got the T shirt. Its doable, but hard freaking work. Only worth doing in rare circumstances.

As a lifelong hater of unnecessary drama having to orchestrate that kind of thing actively made me not like her that much anymore ironically.

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"Worst thing you can do is backpedal"

later

"Flirt with her and then call it off"

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Interestingly, I do half the s*** he says to do without thinking about it when not even in the situation.

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I don't understand the hate for the friend zone.

There are a billion women out there, you can easily go out and meet women who will easily want to bang you and it will take a lot less effort than two months worth of planning that could potentially ruin an actual friendship just because you're too scared to go out and bang some other girls

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Usually the friend zone is a problem when someone, you know, makes a habit of being in it.

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the craziest schemes

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Only time I've ever been there with someone I wanted to go further with was when a childhood friend became really hot grown up. But I decided not to go further to not risk the friendship and I'm over it now ^^

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There's nothing wrong with the friend zone... unless 100% of the girls you know friend zone you, which is who this article is aimed towards

Also it's way more fun to put THEM in the friend zone instead if you don't want to bang them

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I have friend zoned a few women, primarily because they're just not attractive, and seriously the tension they give off is palpable.

It's kinda awesome.

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You're not in the friend zone. She isn't interested in you. The fact that you continue to "be her friend" in a vain attempt to bang her makes you a scum bag.

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From: Aecioo | #006
I don't understand the hate for the friend zone.

There are a billion women out there, you can easily go out and meet women who will easily want to bang you and it will take a lot less effort than two months worth of planning that could potentially ruin an actual friendship just because you're too scared to go out and bang some other girls
Breaking out of the friendzone shouldnt be to get laid once. Its only really worth the effort is you like, potentially want to marry that person. Its that much of a commitment to break it.

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Breaking out of the friendzone shouldnt be to get laid once. Its only really worth the effort is you like, potentially want to marry that person.

Yeah, but Roissy's articles usually contain advices to get a girl to have sex with you. I don't read his blog that often, though, so perhaps he's switched to "how to have a healthy relationship with a girl" now.

The sheer number of alphas in the comments is outstanding.

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Mr Lasastryke posted...

Breaking out of the friendzone shouldnt be to get laid once. Its only really worth the effort is you like, potentially want to marry that person.

Yeah, but Roissy's articles usually contain advices to get a girl to have sex with you. I don't read his blog that often, though, so perhaps he's switched to "how to have a healthy relationship with a girl" now.

hahahahaahhaahahahahahahahahahahahahah ahahahahahahahahahahahahahlahahahahaha hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahah

*breathe*

hahahahaahhaahahahahahahahahahahaha hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahlahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahah ahahahahahahhahahahahahahahahahaha haahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha

ha

From: baubeta | #012

You're not in the friend zone. She isn't interested in you. The fact that you continue to "be her friend" in a vain attempt to bang her makes you a scum bag.

That's only about 50% of the time. And then you have the "Hyper Mega Friend Zone" girls that go around building a harem of friend zone'd guys that follow her around. They definitely want you to keep "being friends".

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The idea of a "friend zone" is flawed, because it is essentially reducing women to sex objects. The people who are in the "friend zone" continue to hang around because they think, eventually, with enough time and effort and "being there" for someone, you are owed sex. So, when the girl, who assumes that the person is actually a friend, and not a creep hanging around her because he wants to bone her, continues to not have sex with that person, they get offended, and slowly start to hate her, still wanting to have sex with her because they've put in too much time and effort in to not have sex with her. These "relationships" end either when the guy just can't take it and basically asks "Why won't you **** me!?!!", and the girl, creeped out at what she thought was a friend basically coming out and revealing himself to be the massive douche he is, tells him off, and he writes her, and all women, off as whores, because she(they) won't have sex with him. Girls put you in the "friend zone", not because they don't want to have sex with you, but because they want to be friends with you. You're acting like a nice guy, and she's enjoying being flattered, so she continues to hang out with and talk to you. She doesn't know you're doing it because you want to have sex with her. And honestly, even if she does, it's totally within her right to take advantage of you like that, because you're being a dishonest creep.

foolm0ron posted...

From: baubeta | #012

You're not in the friend zone. She isn't interested in you. The fact that you continue to "be her friend" in a vain attempt to bang her makes you a scum bag.

That's only about 50% of the time. And then you have the "Hyper Mega Friend Zone" girls that go around building a harem of friend zone'd guys that follow her around. They definitely want you to keep "being friends".

And you know what? Those girls are still in the right. Why should they be judged because they seem to attract the dudes that just want to have sex with her, but will wait years for the chance that they will never get, because they have some sort of "friendship + being nice = eventual sex!!!" Sure, they're taking advantage of these guys, but these guys are letting themselves be taken advantage of because of a misguided belief that simply by being nice, they will eventually be owed sex. I mean, these girls tend to make it abundantly clear that they're never going to be with these guys, even if they don't outright say it. It's their fault for staying around.

Yesss haven't seen this blog in a while

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From: yoshifan823 | #019

Why should they be judged

Because success is frowned upon in today's culture

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_foolmo_
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Also, the article in the OP is disgusting because holy crap, it is literally reducing women to sex objects. "At some point you’ll have to make a bold move for her vagina." is not something normal, healthy people say, unless "her vagina" is some sort of slang term for a football endzone, and your last name is Harbaugh.

I mean, if you just want sex, don't be a creep who is using "science" and "game" to get it. Go to a bar and talk to a girl like she's a human being, same as you, and if she likes you, go for it. That's my whole issue with this "alpha/beta" thing, is that the endgame is ****ing as many girls as possible, and if that's your goal, then you really need to rethink your entire life, because that's not healthy.

From: yoshifan823 | #018

The idea of a "friend zone" is flawed, because it is essentially reducing women to sex objects.

I think YOUR idea of the friend zone is what is flawed, since your description is all wrong. It's more complex than that on both the male and female ends, so it's really not reducing anyone to a sex object until people like you come along and claim it to be so.

It even seems like you're never been friend zone'd, which is great for you in a sense, but I feel like you're missing out on a critical learning experience.

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Go to a bar and talk to a girl like she's a human being, same as you, and if she likes you, go for it.

Some people need help landing girls. "Just talk" isn't good enough advice for a lot of betas. If it works for you that's great, you're not as beta as some people here.

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foolm0ron posted...

From: yoshifan823 | #018

The idea of a "friend zone" is flawed, because it is essentially reducing women to sex objects.

I think YOUR idea of the friend zone is what is flawed, since your description is all wrong. It's more complex than that on both the male and female ends, so it's really not reducing anyone to a sex object until people like you come along and claim it to be so.

It even seems like you're never been friend zone'd, which is great for you in a sense, but I feel like you're missing out on a critical learning experience.

Oh no, I have. I spent 3 years of high school being best friends with a girl, in that exact situation. I know what it is, and looking back on it, I'm embarrassed at how I acted with her. We're still friends, but a much more normal, healthy friendship. I should have realized that she was obviously not into me, and was pretty clear about that, even though she never straight out said it. Maybe I have the benefit of hindsight, but staying in that sort of relationship hinders both people, and I'm glad I don't do it any more, because holy crap I felt perpetually horrible about myself.

From: yoshifan823 | #018

The people who are in the "friend zone" continue to hang around because they think, eventually, with enough time and effort and "being there" for someone, you are owed sex. So, when the girl, who assumes that the person is actually a friend, and not a creep hanging around her because he wants to bone her, continues to not have sex with that person, they get offended, and slowly start to hate her, still wanting to have sex with her because they've put in too much time and effort in to not have sex with her.

So is this describing you?

If so, that is pretty damn disgusting.

Or maybe I am the one with the "unusual" friend zone experience.

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foolm0ron posted...

From: yoshifan823 | #018

The people who are in the "friend zone" continue to hang around because they think, eventually, with enough time and effort and "being there" for someone, you are owed sex. So, when the girl, who assumes that the person is actually a friend, and not a creep hanging around her because he wants to bone her, continues to not have sex with that person, they get offended, and slowly start to hate her, still wanting to have sex with her because they've put in too much time and effort in to not have sex with her.

So is this describing you?

If so, that is pretty damn disgusting.

Or maybe I am the one with the "unusual" friend zone experience.

Was. I was 15-17, so I was more about "1 truuuu luvvvvv" than "I want to bone you", but essentially, yeah. I believed that we were "meant to be", and that she just didn't know it (very dumb, and pretty insulting to her, too), but I stuck around, hoping she'd realize that. It was wrong, and dumb, and like I said, embarrassing that I acted that way. I never quite reached that last stage of pure hate, but it was pretty condescending, which is a different kind of hate.

seems like a lot of work when you could just go f*** some other chick

WazzupGenius00 posted...

seems like a lot of work when you could just go f*** some other chick

Some people live in small towns I guess.

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Interesting. All the people I know who have been/are friend zone'd are just like "I love being in your presence because you have nice hair" and not "grr why won't you have sex with me yet I hate you".

Seriously, all the "harem" girls that I have seen always have really nice hair. I think that's the key to attracting the betas.

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WazzupGenius00 posted...

seems like a lot of work when you could just go f*** some other chick

Yes. If all you want is something to have sex with, buy a hooker, or a fleshlight.

foolm0ron posted...

Interesting. All the people I know who have been/are friend zone'd are just like "I love being in your presence because you have nice hair" and not "grr why won't you have sex with me yet I hate you".

Seriously, all the "harem" girls that I have seen always have really nice hair. I think that's the key to attracting the betas.

I think that's just a way to attract guys in general. I like nice hair.

From: foolm0ron | #030
Interesting. All the people I know who have been/are friend zone'd are just like "I love being in your presence because you have nice hair" and not "grr why won't you have sex with me yet I hate you".

Seriously, all the "harem" girls that I have seen always have really nice hair. I think that's the key to attracting the betas.
Well, girls with great hair are a rarity, if youre gonna be a devotee, thats a good thing to do it for.

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Also nice hair tends to accompany good hygeine, and thats common sense.

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people who get pissed off from being friend zoned need to realize that you aren't being a "nice guy", your approach to getting with a girl is just horrible.

UltimaterializerX posted...

From: yoshifan823 | #018

The idea of a "friend zone" is flawed, because it is essentially reducing women to sex objects.

All men think this way, roissey just tells people to stop denying it.

And this is why roissey is dumb. Him, and his followers, view women as inferior, existing solely to f***, and they spout horrible "biotruths" because they would like to convince themselves that they're better than other guys because "at least we admit it", when in fact, they're just dumb guys who view women as inferior, existing solely to f***. There's a huge strain of misogyny running through this entire group of people, just like their political counterparts, Men's Rights Activists. If it makes me appear weak to respect women as people in your eyes, I'll take it, because clearly your eyes are f***ed up.

Hey, here's a word of advice yoshifan: Stop arguing about this topic on this board.

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vcharon posted...

Hey, here's a word of advice yoshifan: Stop arguing about this topic on this board.

I know. I'm almost as dumb, because I think that with enough common sense and shame, these guys will change, when they need a lot more than that.

you can respect women as people and still pretty much want your only relationships with those outside of cousin, mother, sister to be sex or see ya later. it doesn't mean they're sex objects if the first thought that comes across your mind when you see a hot girl is "wow i'd like to bone her."

it also doesn't mean they're sex objects if you don't have time for their nonsense outside of sexual behavior. Most hot girls are incredibly high maintenance... I've had my fair share of friend zone style experiences when I actually thought "hey, maybe it isn't bad to be friends with this chick." Yeah... nothing in common, high strung, and nothing but a **** tease 24/7.

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Swifticuffs posted...

you can respect women as people and still pretty much want your only relationships with those outside of cousin, mother, sister to be sex or see ya later. it doesn't mean they're sex objects if the first thought that comes across your mind when you see a hot girl is "wow i'd like to bone her."

it also doesn't mean they're sex objects if you don't have time for their nonsense outside of sexual behavior. Most hot girls are incredibly high maintenance... I've had my fair share of friend zone style experiences when I actually thought "hey, maybe it isn't bad to be friends with this chick." Yeah... nothing in common, high strung, and nothing but a **** tease 24/7.

Are you antisocial and hate all people, or just not like hanging out with women? Either way, why?

Two of my best friends are women. I don't see how it's being antisocial to not want to be friendzoned. If we get off our highhorses and stop thinking on this "deep" level like you're trying to think, life boils down to reproduction with a healthy mate. Healthy mate is someone hot. That's why when you go walking down the street and see a hot girl, the first thing a normal dude thinks is "wow i'd like to bone that chick." Which is also why when you fail to get that to transpire, you usually don't stick around because nine times out of ten the chick doesn't have much in common with the average male. I don't see what's fun about sitting through hours of drama 24/7 and just being reminded of not being able to tap something hot.

But way to automatically assume someone doesn't like hanging out with women entirely just because he doesn't like drama the hot ones produce. Maybe you need to grow up a bit more even moreso from your 15-17 year old days as you described up above.

That or get off the high horse that every net kid goes through at some time of life. Things are realllllyy simple.

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*~Swift~*

lmfao yoshifan I had hoped you were a girl with how vehement and misandrist you've been in the past few topics, but this topic has been an eye opener.

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Look at his block of text up above too talking about how there's no such thing as the friendzone. It literally proves everything rousiey (can't spell his name) true. The girl likes being your friend, according to yoshifan, because you're nice and flattering her and stuff.

the kicker is how he describes himself to have once been a dirtbag expecting sex through the "let me be there for her and then one day, boom!" approach of being a 'friend." XFD

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*~Swift~*

Swifticuffs posted...

Two of my best friends are women. I don't see how it's being antisocial to not want to be friendzoned. If we get off our highhorses and stop thinking on this "deep" level like you're trying to think, life boils down to reproduction with a healthy mate. Healthy mate is someone hot. That's why when you go walking down the street and see a hot girl, the first thing a normal dude thinks is "wow i'd like to bone that chick." Which is also why when you fail to get that to transpire, you usually don't stick around because nine times out of ten the chick doesn't have much in common with the average male. I don't see what's fun about sitting through hours of drama 24/7 and just being reminded of not being able to tap something hot.

But way to automatically assume someone doesn't like hanging out with women entirely just because he doesn't like drama the hot ones produce. Maybe you need to grow up a bit more even moreso from your 15-17 year old days as you described up above.

That or get off the high horse that every net kid goes through at some time of life. Things are realllllyy simple.

I guess this is where we differ. Life is a lot more than just "reproduction with a healthy mate". We are not cavemen. People can want to be with someone for reasons other than physical attractiveness, and even then, you can not want to reproduce. There's careers, there's fulfilling life events, there are all sorts of things that people want things that don't just boil down to that.

Also, hot girls are people too. I'm not gonna lie and say that most of the time, when I see a hot girl, I think "wow I'd like to bone that chick", but there's a difference between wanting to have sex with someone and enjoying someone's company. I don't know exactly what kind of "drama" you're talking about, but I'm pretty sure that it's not just the hot ones that attract it. There are plenty of attractive women who have things in common with "average guys", because there's a wide swath of guys in that group. "Average guys" can have a lot of different interests. So can hot girls. Women are people, men are people. There is not much difference between the two, and that's what this really comes down to.

yoshifan823 posted...

vcharon posted...

Hey, here's a word of advice yoshifan: Stop arguing about this topic on this board.

I know. I'm almost as dumb, because I think that with enough common sense and shame, these guys will change, when they need a lot more than that.

Really, just don't argue it with the 'alpha males' (Sess, Ulti, Extha, etc). They take your caring enough to even argue with them as a sign of weakness, so you literally can't convince them otherwise.

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ExThaNemesis posted...

lmfao yoshifan I had hoped you were a girl with how vehement and misandrist you've been in the past few topics, but this topic has been an eye opener.

BTW: Misandry is only a thing about as much as white rights are.

"I'm a straight, white male, and dammit, I'm being discriminated against. Never mind my natural social advantage of being straight, white, and male."

there's nothing wrong with guys in the friendzone other than their inability to grasp the facets of attraction. A girl collects beta orbiters because it allows her to soak in male attention and affection without having to reciprocate.

http://thechart.blogs.cnn.com/2012/06/14/every-woman-needs-a-gaggle-of-men/#comments

they call it a gaggle now, and CNN and other major media outlets are literally advising women to snag as many beta orbiters as possible.

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Ok Extha maybe not, he just usually seems to parrot whatever Ulti and Sess believe in any topic about this, I don't know anything about his personal life. But Ulti literally bases his entire persona these days around being an alpha so I dunno what you're finding so funny.

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