LogFAQs > #973058383

KanWan posted...

You said you were Christian right>? How do you reconcile this thought with that???

God has a plan for everyone, and the way I see it? His plan for me is to see if I can withstand what I have before me without giving up (via suicide). That's really the only thing keeping me going and all I can aspire to do, and my faith is the only thing that even gives me that much.

Heartomaton posted...

I don't understand what you're saying and I doubt that's because it makes complete sense and I'm just not getting it.

You're not the only one who has been beaten down by life, experienced nothing but failure both socially and otherwise, and thinks they can't do anything about it.

Hell, you're not even the only one on this board who feels that way and has a bad habit of reminding everyone else about it for quite literally no good reason.

Furthermore, I'm dealing with the same feelings myself, and I've got a strikingly similar situation in life that you two do. But the difference is I'm not letting it beat me. Don't hit me with some garbage about differing inner strengths either, because I don't have any. What I DO have is anger, which is what I'm tapping into in a constructive way to keep going, which is exactly what I suggested you do last time we had this back and forth. It's what I'm going to do every time we have it in the future, too.

Me tapping into anger wouldn't be a good thing for anyone. I have a lot of it, and letting it manifest wouldn't be pretty; therefore, outside of small occasions (where I end up saying things that end up hurting others) where I can't really help myself, it's something to be kept under lock and key.