Come on man skip the rules. We get it by now. Except for Akane, probably.
Im here todaybecause coach Nekomaru risked his lifeto protect meIm gonna be the one who avenges him! Ill definitely find out who the killer is! Yeah Akane that seems doubtful based on your past history but I appreciate your enthusiasm.
I just realized that both Fuyuhiko and Akane were saved by someone else who is now dead. Wonder if that is going to be a theme or if well see anyone else that gets saved before the game is over.
Kazuichi panics because Hajime was with Sonia and Chiaki first thing in the morning and insinuates the three of them spent the night together. Kazuichi, Hajime wishes he was half the player you imagine him to be.
Sonia: Imbecile! I am not some woman with flexible legs! Great use of the word imbecile. That is a really awkward way of saying you arent a skank, but good use of the word imbecile nonetheless.
Akane: Theres no way a chick would kill someone so cruellyso it must be one of you Strawberry House dudes. First off women can do anything they put their minds to, even murder. Secondly the last two killers were women and the one two cases ago specifically killed someone with a blow to the head. So, no. Objection. Objection all over the place.
Kazuichi seems to think the hammer was the muder weapon in spite of the fact the hammer is in perfect condition and has no oil on it. I smack him upside the head with some cold hard TRUTH.
Akane: Youre pretty insightful, Baby Gangsta! Damn thats a good nickname for Fuyuhiko and Im going to be mad if I didnt use it for him at some point already.
Everyone dunks on Kazuichi for having a dumb idea, and he sheepishly relents going lol jk I was just testing you guys! It was just a prank, bro!
Chiaki then declares that the murder weapon would need to be something that does have blood on it. Which means the murder weapon wasNekomaru himself! AHA! Beaten to death with his own body. That ol trope.
Or maybe that huge pillar I guess. That's less cool but "fine" I guess.
Theres something weird about the room itself though that might be a clue. Theyre very clearly telling me hey this layout isnt the way you think it is. Maybe my ramblings about one house on top of the other turned out to be right?
Now we have to discuss how maybe the pillar wasnt the weapon because you couldnt pick it up. Yeah, no kidding IMBECILES (good word Sonia, love it). We dont have a Casey At Bat situation here. I bet you could push it though. Or at least you could if you were a magical robot.
Oh hey Akane points out Nekomaru couldve lifted it. Sorry I called you dumb, youre ok. She also says it wouldnt matter because Nekomaru isnt the kind to commit suicide, but I still think he mightve if the alternative was all his friends starving to death.
Oh hey maybe this really was a suicide? Hajime flashes back to Nagito mentioning the suicide from the last game and then hes like BUT THERE IS NO WAY THIS IS A SUICIDE RIGHT GUYS. I lean in closely to his ear. I know what youre doing, friend-o. And it isnt working on me.
Dang both Sonia and I are wrong. There were no pillar fragments on top of his body, only underneath. Which means the pillar fell first, I guess. There goes the last shred of my "crushed himself with a pillar" theory. Im not quite sure a pillar being pulled down on top of him would leave fragments on his body, but I am not expert on robot murder so Ill believe Hajime on this one.
When we cant figure out how the pillar was used to kill Nekomaru, Nagito gets all pouty and complains about how we arent being special enough and living up to our ultimate status. Nagito you mustve been a lot of fun at parties before the world ended.
Fuyuhiko: Hey Nagitowhat the hell happened to you? Follow up question: HOW DARE YOU.
Seriously though something is off about Nagito now. Hes cruel in a way he wasnt cruel before. I have no clue what was in that file, but it mustve been some tasty late game spoilers because Nagito is somehow now more crazy than he was before.
Wow Sonia straight up is horny for Gundham. He goes off on some crazy nonsense about how he was the ultimate weapon because bleep blorp Im a crazy person and shes like "no youre MORE than that because of your amazing hamsters and oops my blouse just popped open tee hee MY LOINS". Keep it in your pants girl, dude might be a murderer.
Oh cool time to find out the secret of the funhouse! Its dark secret? The contractors used asbestos.
You still dont realize it? Jeez, get it togetheryoure supposed to be the symbols of hope, arent you? Ah I forgotexcept for Hajime, of course. Hey, Nagito. First off, rude. Second off, one of these symbols of hope is Akane so dont get your hopes up to high.
Sonia is set to solve the secret of the funhouse. I think it must have something to do with the structure of the funhouse! STAND BACK EVERYONE SHES GOT IT. It is undeniable that such a sweeeeet building structure is the secret of the Funhouse! GET BACK EVERYONE SHES LOST IT
No one can figure it out so we have to go begging Nagito to help us. He is as helpful as youd expect (zero) and says he WANTS TO PLAY A LITTLE GAME instead in his best Jigsaw voice.
Nagito says he can give us a hint as to the secret of the funhouse by showing a very special picture he took while inside the Final Dead room. Man, do I hope it isnt his genitals.
And as he said thathe showed us a peculiar picture oh fuck it is his genitals isnt it?
Phew not genitals. Just a boring picture of some trees and the clouds. This photo tells us three things: 1) the first floor of strawberry house is higher up as it is above the tree line 2) grape house isnt in the photo at all and it appears there is just one structure leading to the tower 3) the ghost of Mahiru lives on through NAGITOS ARTISTIC HAND
Grape house is actually on top of strawberry house. Or is it the other way around? I already forgot. The important part is that these were oriented vertically. That confirms what I was thinking, and at least parts of this murder are making a bit more sense now.
Kazuichi flexes his muscles and tells Sonia to check him out solving the mystery of grape tower/strawberry tower in relation to the houses. Sonia yawns and continues eye humping Gundham. Its for the best because Kazuichis theory is someone built a replica Mechamaru and thats why we saw a body in both locations. Congrats Kazuichi that is the dumbest theory weve heard in a trial so far and Akane has been alive and saying things the entire game.
Chiaki instead proposes that maybe the floor just moved. Akane is flabbergasted and Chiaki is flabbergasted about her being flabbergasted. You cant think a device like that? A device that moves things to different floors in the same building. Honestly, she probably couldnt Chiaki so spell it out for her.
Oh actually I quite literally have to spell it out in a hangmans gambit. Cool.
Ok so cool we have now figured out the mystery of the very bad architect. Can we now focus instead on the mystery of who exploded Nekomaru?
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Moops? "I thought you were making up diseases? That's spontaneous dental hydroplosion."