LogFAQs > #914884655

Shaduln posted...

Listen to Corrik over the trained therapist, he knows better.

It is literal common sense. Anyone who has any experience in mainstreaming/special education can tell you this.

If the behavior isn't prevalent, it is not a cognitive issue in a child. If it manifests around certain individuals, it is behavioral. Behavioral therapy with the parents where a therapist tells you how to deal with behavior to shape responses and avoid problematic behaviors/responses is a good idea.

Planned ignoring, proper phrasing of questions/ set up of situations, and etc are good things to learn.

One of the biggest issues parents run into is not knowing how to talk to kids.

NO is the last thing you generally want to have to tell a child unless it is something major. Thus, shaping your questions to avoid this response is always best.

For example...

Poorly framed questioning to a kid.

Question: "What would you like for breakfast?"

Answer: "Ice cream and Skittles".

Your Response: "No, you can't have that."

Child gets upset.

This is exactly how you DON'T talk to a child who has a behaviorial issue. Because the child did nothing but answer your question as asked and you responded by telling them no. Why did you even ask the question then if their response wouldn't be allowed?

Better question

Question: "Would you like eggs for breakfast?"

Answer: "No, I hate eggs"

Response: "How about cereal? You can have cereal or eggs if you are hungry. If not, and you get hungry later let me know and I will get you one of those".

Learning how to not lead conversations to "no" and misdirecting conversations to answers you find acceptable is one of the key things most parents lack the training on and it can handle many situations.

This can help with behavioral issues

That said, a three year old saying ridiculous things is not a cause for concern. You just want to ignore it at times, very calmly say stuff like "we don't say stuff like that. We love kitties. They are cute! Don't you think so!" and do your best to not make a big deal about it. Some kids will do things purposely just for attention from a parent. If you make a big deal to bad behavior, you reinforce doing bad things to get that attention.
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LoL ID = imajericho
XBL GT = Corrik