LogFAQs > #911218642

Quick backstage interview with a sleepy cyborg:

Bob: "Charles."
CPU: "...Yes, Bob?"
Bob: "You know what I'm going to ask, and you look like you need a month-long nap, so... wanna share your thoughts?"
CPU: "Not.... (Yawns, stretches) particularly, no, but might as well get this out of the way so I can sleep the idiocy off." (Lifts five fingers, lowers the first one.) "First and most importantly, congratulations to one of my partners to their new title! Not my sorta deal as ya know, but can't say he didn't work hard to earn the bloody thing. Proud of him, not gonna speak FOR him, however."

(Lowers second.) "...Someone has the option to hire anyone they want, and they hire R-Truth. I'd apologise for what I'm about to say, because I genuinely do like R-Truth, and I can't believe I'm saying this, but this is why Popplio is Sun's best starter. She's a tad goofy, yes, but at least she has a working brain in her skull."

(Lowers third.) "As much as I don't like Bang being brought down by it, I do appreciate being able to guess who's not going to win by listening to who Mundo endorses."

(Lowers fourth) *Grabs a plushie feline, and punts it out a nearby window.* "Vash the Stampede is a *pansy, and Outlaw Star was better than Trigun.* Both are still worse than RK, though."

(Lowers the fifth and final finger.) "...Bowser wishes to fight... *me* for stealing his thunder, does he? Odd, last time I looked I wasn't his idiot son, a 2D star-themed jester, a feathered combatant or whatever the hell *Smithy* was supposed to be, but I'm always up for a challenge from a worthy opponent, and I can't say Bower's anything less than that. ...Considering this company, it's probably bound to be something as ridiculous as a Rule 63 match between Peachowser and whatever a genderflipped me would be called, especially considering that damned Super Crown that's been going around..." *CPU muses to himself, muttering things like 'Can't believe Sting-Miz didn't figure that out....' then he waves his hand* "Can I go now? As tired as anyone else after that Feast or Fired match."

Bob: "One last thing."
CPU: "...Yes?"
Bob: "...Why didn't you go for the last briefcase?"
CPU: "...At what point have I ever shown an interest in a potential title or title match? ...And... hindsight being 20/20, that... would've been the Fired case, so dodged a bullet there... possibly in poor taste, after what happened with Telltale Combat a few weeks back, but whatcha gonna do, right? ...Oddly fitting considering his origin, though. May I go now?"
Bob: "You may, thank you for your time."
CPU: "The pleasure is-" *falls over as he falls asleep.*

(...Celebs. ...Kermit the Frog, Aisha Clan Clan, Mariel Gullwhacker)
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My thesaurus arrived yesterday, but when I opened it it was blank inside. I have no words to describe how angry I am.