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TopicWho do you save: burning building, toddler Hitler, racist dog, or SJW laptop?
garan
03/13/18 4:11:06 AM
#1:


Who do you save?





You are trapped in a burning building with a toddler Hitler, a racist dog, & an SJW laptop. You have an escape route and can save 1 of them, put out the fire by sacrificing the computer, dog, and toddler, or flee by yourself.

The toddler will grow up to be just as bad as the original Hitler and cannot be stopped unless you let it die now.

The racist dog attacks everyone who isn't white, specifically biting people in the genitals. It also will piss on you as you attempt to save it, even if you are white.

The SJW laptop is an AI that constantly plays obnoxious preaching youtube videos yelling at you for being sexist, racist, homophobic, transphobic, and every other fucking thing you can think of. There is no way to turn it off or get it to have any other functions. If you try to flee the laptop, it will infect all your other electronics and continue to plague you for the rest of your life.

The burning building is possessed by the spirit of Candyman and will attempt to kill you and everyone you know if you save it.

If you let them all die, you will be reincarnated with godlike powers in an alternate universe. However, the world you leave behind will be doomed as the toddler, building, dog, & laptop will team up to enslave humanity, poison the environment, and kill all of the penguins.
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