This is a fact understood by all. Except you. You posit there is some spark of goodness inside ponies. All I see is glue. Evil glue. An evil that has left a sticky residue on certain parts of the internet (which I will concede is at least different from the other sticky residues of the rest of the internet). No, there is nothing positive about these diminutive equines. They put up a facade of cuteness, but behind lay only the purest concentration of negativity known to the universe. One need only briefly examine the universe for confirmation that equines are the void in which matter is swallowed:
Yet, here I am about to embark on the greatest single mistake of my modest existence. I am about to actively choose to allow audio and visual pony simulacra to grace my mental livelihood. By making this choice of my own volition, I have already discarded false pretenses of sanity. It is only with the understanding that sanity is nigh nonexistent among homo sapiens sapiens in the first place that I can gather the will to proceed.
It would behoove me to know the price this pursuit of pony pain will demand. An episode is 22 minutes. A season is 26 episodes. This equates to 572 minutes or 9.5 hours of cruel and unusual punishment. Even the constitution supports the criminalization of pony related media. Legalities aside, I can only stall so much. It is time to begin the end of all things decent. It is time to experience My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic. Help me.
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There is no shame in not knowing; the shame lies in not finding out