Note: I will not be reading route 3 because I've been informed that it contains a dangerous amount of purple haired girl whose name I forgot. I kinda hate her and every scene she is in, so I'm not even going to touch that route.
So, try to guess who each character is. It shouldn't be hard.
Warning: I have strange opinions
Anyway, RANKINGS:
Routes: 2>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>1
Characters:
I nicknamed characters a lot during my readthrough so you are going to have to guess who they are. I remember their real names for the most part but WHAT'S THE FUN IN THAT.
5)Jersey Shore.
As soon as I saw his sprite, I thought "wow, this guy is a douchebag." And every single little thing he said just confirmed that. Every time he opened his mouth all I could think of was this:
Dude is just so hilariously cartoonishly douchebagy I can't hate him. If he had a mustache, he'd be twirling it. But he doesn't. And if his sprite was just a bit different, he'd be fist pumping and going to clubs.
He is such a douchebag he is actually fun to read. I hate him so much it comes full circle back into ironically liking him.
So he's Jersey Shore.
Except I just hate Jersey Shore, the show.
4)Rin
See, I don't even have a nickname for her. She's just...not an idiot. And that made the whole romance in route 2 much less painful than the Twilight/Star Wars episode 2 romance of route 1 where it was "SHE IS BEAUTIFUL AND HER SKIN IS SMOOTH UNLIKE SAND WHICH IS ROUGH" or something.
Nothing that special about her but she's actually entertaining. So hey.
3) Arthur Dent.
I'm fairly sure a lot of people hate this fella, but I can't hate him. He is just so...borderline apathetic that it's kind of funny. He reminds me of Arthur Dent for obvious reasons. It's actually funny instead of infiuritating. I mean I suspect that if I hadn't called him "Arthur Dent" the entire time in my head while reading I could have been upset by some earlier events, but keeping in mind that he's like Arthur Dent I was just like "Oh Dent you." And I love him.
2)Vance
The nickname comes from a detective novel most of you probably haven't read, so I'll sum up the detective in question:
This detective in question is a dick to absolutely everyone. Sometimes he has a reason, sometimes he doesn't, more often than not he just wants to be a dick.
He is intelligent, witty, but above all, he's a dick. You know that there's a lot more to his character than that, but if somebody asks you what you remember about him, the answer is "he's a dick. A hilariously entertaining dick."
1)Sheamus
OOOOOOOOOHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
IT'S A SHAMEFUL THING
LOBSTER HEAD
TOO MANY LIMES
TOO MANY LIMES