Sonic The Hedgehog Issue #9
April 1994
"Pseudo-Sonic" starts things off. As you might guess from the title, Sonic's opponent is a robotic clone of himself Robotnik built (only requires 3500 AA batteries!). We'll get there in a bit. First we have a possible Knothole Discovery spot, with Antoine guarding the secret entrance to Knothole Village. Wouldn't having a guard right in front of the entrance be a good indication that the secret entrance is right there? You tell me.
Anyway, Sonic's off to get some flowers for Sally, but accidentally picks up some poisonous ones that he's also allergic to, gets real swollen up and passes out. During that time, Pseudo-Sonic makes his way to Knothole's entrance, with Antoine of course not being able to tell the difference. The rest of the gang easily tell it's a robotic clone, but before it can reveal the location of Knothole, Tails of all people saves the day by dragging his two tails real fast on the ground to generate enough static electricity to not only screw up Robotnik's feed but also destroy Pseudo-Sonic. Meanwhile, Robotnik spots the real (and severely weakened) Sonic while tracking his robot's last known location. Luckily we have Betty Butterfly to let the FF know where he is, and Sonic is saved just in time by mah gurl Bunnie, who beats the **** out of Robotnik and literally throws him all the way back to Robotropolis. Hell Yeah! On top of that she also cures him of his allergic reactions. Totally should have been Sonic x Bunnie instead of Sonic x Sally. Then again there's still 200+ issues for Archie to fix that. Anyway, that ends the story.
You get to learn how to draw Sonic in a ministory. I like that.
"What's The Point?" is story number two. Sonic finds a porcupine-bird and decides to bring it to Knothole as a present for Sally's birthday. Turns out she hates it (especially after it eats her cake) and wants Sonic to take it back where he found it. As Sonic is finding a safe place for the bird, he spots Sally (who was picking berries for making another cake) captured by an EVIL TREE. Sonic spends an entire panel getting all the cheesy tree-related puns out of the way so we don't have to read them later. Before he himself is captured, Thorny the bird saves him and shows him which tree is the evil one. Sonic makes quick work of the tree, but here comes Robotnik armed with a freeze blaster. Thorny saves the day again by taking a **** on Robotnik's head and pecking him in the ass. Okay it was an egg and not poop. NOW Sally likes the damn thing. Whatever, the end.
Awesome pin-up of a totally ripped Sonic. I wish I could find a picture.
Great story followed by a bad one, but I'll take it. It's nice to see Sonic in moments of weakness every now and then.
--
HBJ Dubs
~Project 1000~