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TopicFuck/Marry/Kill: Shiva, Sheva and Sheeva
ViewtifulJoe
02/05/22 7:43:28 AM
#20:


Sheva is the best option here by a mile. Even with the big handicap you gave the other two by using the default costume and not Fairy Tale or Business. She has a mercs loadout with a handcannon and 5 gold eggs (5 full health bars and they all stack on one inventory spot, man), can do spinning jump kicks, will happily follow you around with 8 first aid sprays and a longbow to keep you safe and healthy and she got to meet RE5 Wesker in person which is has to be some sort of blessing, enlightenment or misc good luck spell. Never forget Chris assaulted that boulder for her. You don't do that for just anyone.

Shiva doesn't talk which sucks and she probably radiates cold which I don't need because it's winter already. She would probably attract a lot of negative attention just by being some sort of ice demon that shoots ice blasts. She also might try to make me attend one of those Yevon temple trials which I'm not in the mood for. Non-verbally. I bet that's not obtuse and tiring.

Sheeva is from the cartoonishly evil MK dimension where people tear each other limb from limb over small disagreements. I'm not even going for the easy cosmetic insults. She probably has little to no concept of empathy and has values wholly incompatible with what you'd want. Last time I checked her moveset sucked, getting taken clothes shopping with her would be an absolute ordeal, she's probably not very interesting to talk to and probably puts way to much effort into trying to sound tough. Any ideas in your head about what four arms could do will probably only lead to frustration when she either won't or can't understand and reciprocate.

Sheva could also defeat both of them because the RE5 infinite rocket launcher is out of control in the best way.

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Still waiting on that third threat
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