LogFAQs > #960217307

LinkPizza posted...

That's the whole point. It's only bad because it's excessive. The problem is that excessive changes person to person, and based on literally everything else in life. Like I said earlier...

If you want to be a good SO, it can be helpful to help find solutions to problems. Any SO who leaves at the first sign of a flaw is a bad SO, IMO. Or anyone who doesn't want to help their SO is a bad SO... Relationships are about overcoming problems together... So, you don't need to help them. But an actual good SO would, at the very least, try... And if it gets toxic from trying to help, then leave. But trying to help is usually the opposite of toxic... Unless you're trying to help is something like screaming at them...

And I know it wasn't specifically about them. I use them as an example for one of the things she mentioned about her relationship, though... Earlier, I even said, "

That's the whole point. It's only bad because it's excessive. The problem is that excessive changes person to person, and based on literally everything else in life. Like I said earlier...

If you want to be a good SO, it can be helpful to help find solutions to problems. Any SO who leaves at the first sign of a flaw is a bad SO, IMO. Or anyone who doesn't want to help their SO is a bad SO... Relationships are about overcoming problems together... So, you don't need to help them. But an actual good SO would, at the very least, try... And if it gets toxic from trying to help, then leave. But trying to help is usually the opposite of toxic... Unless you're trying to help is something like screaming at them...

And I know it wasn't specifically about them. I use them as an example for one of the things she mentioned about her relationship, though... Earlier, I even said, "This article goes through 12 different signs, of which the GF (I presume) only mentioned like 3 or 4. Maybe he does more, but that wasn't what was written..." So, I didn't think it was about him since it wasn't based on specifically what she said. Just extra signs that she says are bad. I was just saying that I do agree with all of them... And even then, I would think you would need a bunch of them to be a manchild, anyway...

lol again you're not talking about things anyone is saying. A man excessively playing video games isn't one first bad sign or little flaw. It's constant behavior that strains the relationship.

Now I know you're going to focus again on maybe it's not excessive. Maybe it's not. If he's playing 1 hour a day or 8 hours a day and neither of them will compromise what makes you think this is a relationship worth sticking around in? Either the guy barely gets to do anything and he's still being nagged at or he's prioritizing video games over his partner. Either they talk about it and figure it out or it's not going to work. This is minor stuff to figure out long term. If they can't find common ground on something like video games how is it gonna be when they start talking about mortgages or raise a child?

A relationship isn't a problem to solve. It's two people gradually combining their lives together. Compromises need to be made and both sides need to accommodate. If this doesn't happen it's not a good relationship. The signs in this article show a man who wants someone to take care of him and doesn't want any responsibility so he's a bad partner to have. If the woman who wrote the letter finds that her partner fits most of the signs chances are she's not in for a good time. I don't need to speculate on what their relationship is actually like or make excuses for him. That's up to her to figure out.

Sometimes people just aren't compatible regardless anyway. A lot of relationships aren't worth saving or 'solving'

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A Fallen Mascot