LogFAQs > #955545985

you know, tc, this reminds me of something that happened to me on vacation a few years back.

Picture this: 5 billion people in a theme park. Vending Machines of fresh water sold out within an hour of the park's opening. 109 degree heat, zero shade and when you ask for a cold refill of water for your overly expensive free refill water bottle (which you wait nearly an hour for in a line at a time) it TASTES LIKE FUCKING SALTY SELTZER. Never mind that I have to pay for this trip for a fucking year, but the fact that we, as a family could only ride TWO FUCKING ROLLER COASTERS before we ultimately left our SEASON PASSES and went back to our hotel room for the weekend to not die of heat stroke.

Sounds like whining? Maybe we have ourselves a case of buyer's remorse? Here's the rub: The park hasn't made any money for over a year so they re-evaluated their park to fleece as much money from people as possible. Never mind the $15 beers, anyone who's ever seen a live show knows things on the inside of a "paid experience" can be expensive....but on THIS particular weekend, the heat on the west coast reached a possible all time high. In fact, Santa Clarita was on FIRE before I took off for a 17 hour drive back to Oregon about 12 hours before my hotel room was even forfeit...that's right, I called the vacation early and said "Fuck this state, I'm going home".

5 billion people in a park with 1 hour lines to EVERY refill station, EVERY bathroom, EVERY place you could possibly go to reprieve yourself. People paid to ride rides and almost everyone was standing in the shade and waiting to DIE. This was NOT the happiest place on the planet---in fact it was FAR FROM IT.

The website does NOT indicate any kind of these conditions, in fact they expect you to pay outrageous prices to find out for yourself.

So learn from this idiot that found out for himself and dragged his entire family and wasted $3000 in the process.....

Do yourself a favor and stay home, in the air conditioning and the comfort of your favorite things. Don't forgo all of that to come to Magic Mountain in California.

Unless it's December, this place is one of the worst locations y ou can spend your money on.

What use is having the MOST ROLLER COASTERS IN ANY THEME PARK IN AMERICA if you CAN'T ride them BECAUSE IT'S TOO FUCKING HOT.

And before you say "DO BETTER PLANNING NEXT TIME"

Let me tell you, we PLANNED. We brought cool wet rags (I would have died without these). They cool when you wet them and you fan them out to re-cool them. I also had gator hat on with the same cooling technology. We ALL had one of these, plus infinite refills (that we couldn't get because the lines were HORRID). We did pretty much -everything- we could to enjoy yourselves but stay safe and ultimately THE ONLY WAY WE COULD HAVE BEEN OKAY was to leave the park at 5 p.m. because the heat wouldln't subside for another 3 more hours. In which case----the park would have only been open for about 2 hours. It takes about 1 hour to get through any line, sometimes 2, so basically if you WAITED UNTIL DARK, YOU GET ONE RIDE AND THEN IT'S ALL OVER BECAUSE THE PARK IS CLOSED.

FUCK WHAT THE REVIEWS SAY. LA is HOT AS FUCK all year round and the only time worthy of going to this place is the same time everybody else on the planet wants to visit (Winter). So lines out the ass no matter what.

NEVER, EVER, go in the summer. This was one of the WORST THINGS I have EVER done in the name of FUN for me or my FAMILY.

This is just a PSA, a rant, and a chance to fume about how you see things on the internet, think you know what you're doing, only to be bait and switched by God because he loves to see you suffer. Fuck that guy and fuck 6 Flags Magic Mountain in LA, California.

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